00:00:08Brian Atlaswelcome to the whatever dating Talk podcast where we try to make sense of the modern dating hellscape I'm your host Brian atas we're coming to you live from Santa Barbara California every Sunday and Tuesday at 5:00 p.m. Pacific
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00:02:28Brian Atlasprobably not ready to pull up no okay that's fine we'll skip all right guys uh disclaimer the views expressed by the guests do not necessarily reflect the views of the whatever Channel with that said without further Ado we're
00:02:40Nala Raygoing to have the guests introduce themselves so please tell us your name age location and occupation go ahead hi I'm Nala Ray I'm 26 um I live in South Carolina with my husband and we started
00:02:53Brian Atlasa clothing line company called be the change and we do race car giveaways all right wel welcome welcome and uh let's see you it's been almost a
00:03:03Brian Atlasyear I think since the last time you were on the show so it's a not the oneye anniversary almost well since you last been on the show so yeah all right welcome back Nala what about you hi I'm
00:03:15NoraNora I'm Nora tuna I'm from Germany and I'm studying at SC CC right now film and acting all right age I'm 20 20 okay and uh you're you said you're from Germany
00:03:27Norayes okay uh what language did uh what languages do you speak German I learn Spanish German French and Latin and I speak with my mom Italian oh okay and
00:03:40Brian Atlasthen you also do content creation is that correct yes I do what do you do I'm doing only fans and I'm on a lot of platforms okay how long You' been doing
00:03:48Brian Atlasof two years two years okay what kind of content boy girl content solo content got it cute outfits bikinis like okay all right what about uh I'm I'm sorry
00:04:00Andrew Wilsonjust real quick can can you say your name for me one more time my name yeah NOA Nola Nora oh Nora yes y okay what
00:04:11Mandyabout you thank you um hi my name is Mandy um I'm 20 years old um my most recent job was actually at Spirit Halloween and I did um custom
00:04:23Mandylike clo like uh bikini making before that mhm uh where you from uh Northern California Cali okay and are you in school right now no no okay what about
00:04:34Brian Atlasyou hi my name is V I'm 34 from Texas and I work in education all right uh are you a can you expand yeah I used to be a teacher but
00:04:45Vinow I'm just um like in application processing in highered yeah and do you do van life what's that oh like living
00:04:55Viin a van I have no idea where I got that is that did you get that from my name on Instagram no on the side I make rings um
00:05:05Viso I make rings and my husband does some stickers which I gifted you yeah thank you for the stickers appreciate it they're very good Andrew is one of the
00:05:15Vistickers and I wanted him to see his face I'll show it to him later and uh what about you do I have
00:05:24Vilike demon horns coming out or it's it's it's um it's whenever I don't know it's a funny face you made in
00:05:33JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)one of the podast I'm a fan yeah hi I'm JY um I'm 19 uh I'm from Southern California uh I go to school in
00:05:45JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)uh Westmont I'm studying business and I have an art minor and um I play college tennis all right very cool very
00:05:54Alaniscool hi my name is alannis I'm from Pake New Jersey I'm 2 2 years old and my occupations are FLOTUS and I'm also an independent recording artist um in more
00:06:06Alanislike Spanish music and also I'm a student and my major is in healthcare all right what about you hi I'm Natalie I'm almost 21 couple more weeks and I go to
00:06:18JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)Westmont College and I'm studying business all right and where are you from originally I'm from Oregon Oregon okay what about you hi I'm Jessica I'm 33 I'm from Houston Texas I'm currently
00:06:30JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)a stay-at-home mom but I'm working to get my certification in cyber security o damn pop off you said 33 right yes 33
00:06:39Alanisall right how many uh how many kids five what wow you look so young oh yeah thank you thank you you do well done I have
00:06:50JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)one but five that's crazy well I'm a I'm a blended family so I have three of my own and then my husband has two of his own but together we have five
00:07:00Brian Atlasall right uh Brian Atlas 35 Santa Barbara California host of the whatever podcast washed up has been over the hill
00:07:09Andrew WilsonYouTuber Andrew what about you yeah my name is Andrew Wilson I'm the host of The Crucible it's a popular entertainment uh platform on YouTube I'm a political analyst a political
00:07:22Andrew Wilsonsaturnist I enjoy doing conversations and debates of all kinds across the country and appreciate all of you guys coming out to whatever this evening to have these conversations with us all right welcome everybody we're going to
00:07:33Brian Atlasgo around the table once more what's your current relationship status if you're single how long have you been single and what's the longest relationship you've ever been in go ahead so I just got married in March
00:07:47Nala Rayyay that's it how long were you guys uh dating uh we dated October November December January Fe March 5 months before we got married wow okay so you guys been
00:07:59Brian Atlastogether for like a year since last October okay so about a year together totally yeah all right and uh longest relationship two years two years okay
00:08:11Noraall right what about you um I'm single right now my longest relationship was two years and I got out of the relationship in May or June yeah this
00:08:23Brian Atlasyear so you've been single for like 5 months yeah and that was the 2-year relationship yes okay uh who broke up with who we kind of
00:08:34Brian Atlaslike both agreement kind of thing Mutual Mutual yeah were you guys making content together yeah okay all right um and so you've
00:08:45Brian Atlasbeen totally single for the past five months no I mean we still see each other oh the
00:08:57Brian Atlasyes um okay so you still make content together sometimes yeah sometimes when's the last time you saw him this [Laughter]
00:09:14Noramorning oh my god wow wait so last you saw him this morning yeah but you guys broke up we broke yeah because I went
00:09:24Noraback to Germany for two months and then I came back and then kind of you reunited and then school started and
00:09:32Brian Atlasit's just yeah okay it's a lot going on you guys live together we did but not anymore so I'm for breakfast or what
00:09:43Norawhat's up just yeah my my my roommate is gone right now so I have to take advantage of
00:09:51Brian Atlasthe appointment okay all right um in the five months that you've been single have you dated or uh had any situationships with
00:10:03Noraother men I've been on couple dates on double dates with my friend to support them MH but I'm really not interested in any other person okay all right what
00:10:15Mandyabout you um what was the question relationship status yeah um so I currently have a boyfriend and we've been together about 2 years now all
00:10:25Mandyright and that's my longest relationship long how did you guys meet uh um we met on grinder uh [Music]
00:10:36Brian Atlaswhat wait we've heard this before we we we had a girl on the show a while a while ago who met a guy on on grinder
00:10:45Mandyum what um so are you bisexual what's your orientation yes I am bisexual um I just wait isn't that for gay men or
00:10:57Mandyis it for lesbians so technically it is for like gay men and like trans people but I got kicked off of the other dating
00:11:04Mandyapps so for okay okay okay to be completely Fair um before all of this I before like I
00:11:15Mandywas on grinder I was in high school and I was just like kind of experimenting online and stuff and I'm not about that life anymore I don't do any of that kind
00:11:24Mandyof stuff anymore um but yeah so I ended up getting grinder and I met him and we really hit it off like we didn't even
00:11:33Mandyhook up the first night like it was like mostly like just friendly so was kind of weird I know wait you said you were no
00:11:42Brian Atlaslonger about that life what was the life before the whole life the whole life what is what's the whole life I was
00:11:52Mandyjust I would consider myself to have been a sex addict okay um and that's just like I was just going online hooking up with basically anyone
00:12:05MandyI found attractive and I looking back have realized that that's probably not the best thing for
00:12:13Mandyme especially a girl that young so I'm with my current boyfriend and I'm
00:12:20Brian Atlashappy okay um we'll dive more into that in a bit um wait so okay
00:12:29Mandyyou met on grinder yes what just um what are your pronouns I'm I'm a girl she her she her okay what are his pronouns he's
00:12:39Vialso he's he him he was born with a dick like okay yeah just checking just yeah he's checking all right what about you I'm married and my longest relationship
00:12:49Viwas uh four years almost four years how long have you been married for almost 2 years and how long were you datting before that two month
00:13:01Brian Atlaswell like four months four or five months oh wow okay got me here quick uh so how did you meet your current husband uh through mutual friends okay and your
00:13:14Brian Atlasfour-year relationship who broke up with who it was me okay how soon after uh well wait how long ago was your four-year relationship it was a high school Rel High School okay all right
00:13:25Brian Atlasgot it so you met your now husband at 29 30 no um um I'm 34 okay math I'm the math 31 32 about there yeah okay got it
00:13:35JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)what about you I am single and I've been single my whole life single your whole life I've never had a boyfriend um it's actually mostly parent parental
00:13:47JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)restrictions um and even coming to college it's just I've had situationships um I've had talking stages that have never they've never
00:13:56Brian Atlasgone anywhere mhm okay uh what's the longest talking stage situationship you've found yourself in I think it was
00:14:04JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)roughly around a semester so about 3 months I think that was the longest and okay just didn't go anywhere sure uh
00:14:15Brian Atlasright and uh so three months you said okay and uh you're waiting until in until marriage correct yeah for sex for
00:14:25Alaniscarinal knowledge okay all so your are you I am okay cool uh let's see here uh what about you um I'm currently single
00:14:36AlanisI've been single for like a year and a half around about be two years um I got cheated on um post I got Che yeah I just
00:14:47Alanishad my baby and it was 3 months after and I found out I was cheated on since I was pregnant so yeah um I've been on a
00:14:57Alaniscouple of dates on like dating apps um not my cup of tea I get annoyed I'm very picky and I'm very like I like what I
00:15:07Alaniswant cuz I learn from that situation um so yeah okay uh very picky hold on before we come back to very picky I'll just get everybody's
00:15:19Brian Atlasrelationship status what about you I'm very single okay oh and sorry your longest relationship was how long really quick
00:15:28Alanisoh um two years the guy who cheated on me yeah years got uh very single yes so no guys in the
00:15:37Nataliepicture um I mean there's some cute guys at school but I my longest relationship was 3 months but I don't really count it cuz it felt very friendship level like we never held hands he hugged my
00:15:49Nataliegirlfriends he never hugged me it was really really awkward and then he was following like a podcast of like how he wanted to date me and then he sent it to me and I never watched it cuz I'm like why are you like based a relationship
00:16:01Nataliebased off of a podcast was it this it wasn't this I promise I would I would have watched it it was like I'm Christian it was a Christian podcast but
00:16:10Natalieit was very like ladderlike like step one make eye contact step two stuff like that and I was like I'm not going to listen to this so that was a failed relationship I ended it um he cried and
00:16:23Nataliehe was really upset with me and was really mad and all my friends told me like you did that to him and I was like well someone had to I wasn't going to just stay in it so yeah how is that your fault I know I was like I'm sorry he was
00:16:34Nataliesad sorry you wear the pants in the relationship I know literally I wor the pants but yeah so then I've had a couple situationships and talking stages I've failed and but that's life okay so
00:16:47Natalielongest anything is what three months three months and You' been single for how long you'd say for a year wait what is it's November a year and a couple months okay got it what about you well
00:16:59JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)I'm married I've been married for about um three uh sorry 2 years I've been with my current partner for 3 years but my longest relationship was 10 years wow
00:17:09JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)before that mhm uh from what age to what age was the 10 year relationship uh from 15 until 25 I think and you've been with your
00:17:19Brian Atlascurrent uh your husband for 3 years yes married to yes okay and you have five kids correct and these kids are from multiple relationships or yes um the
00:17:31JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)first two are from my previous marriage um and the second one was a surprise and then my other two are my stepsons who
00:17:40JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)are from his previous relationship wait I have five I have five kids two are his his my stepsons
00:17:50JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)then I have three biological children that are mine that I created in my body and from two different fathers correct two different fathers different fathers
00:17:59JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)yes and is one of which your current husband no you have we do we do not have uh ours we have yours and then we have
00:18:08Brian Atlasmine and that's it no ours okay so there's uh in terms of the children in your household three different fathers is that correct yeah there are three
00:18:18Brian Atlasdifferent I see baby dadd biological fathers yes all right in the situation like math ain't math the math is struggling fig out
00:18:30Brian Atlasall right uh okay cool so that's everybody's uh relationship status so uh I want to is your relationship status
00:18:38Nala Rayyou still single you single Pringle I'm I'm a virgin amen oh oh are you are you serious he's a born again he's
00:18:50Brian Atlaslying is it still that perfect number seven I'm waiting for the for the right girl you know I know someone who said he's a born again virgin too I'm aorn born again I'm going have to go back in
00:19:01Brian Atlasthe podcast and check this Andrew got him he got the Christian in him so I want to dive into the very picky thing with you okay so okay when you say
00:19:11Alanisvery picky what does that look like so basically um everyone in my family says I have to lower my standards cuz I'm not going to find anyone what um so the
00:19:22Alanisbackground for that story was that my um I'll give a name to my child's father so like um Pablo yeah Pablo Pablo um I met him and I really
00:19:35Alaniswanted to look for something that my parents created cuz my parents are immigrants they're legal here um they have their citizenship for over almost 35 years so that's my parents my mom came and she
00:19:47Alaniswas a single mom she came from Colombia and she raised her kids by herself and my dad came from Brazil because my grandma brought him here and so they built this empire together they owned this room great company and they took us
00:20:00Alanisout of the hood and they wanted us to have like a better life let go and so I wanted to create that as my fulfillment so with Pablo um basically I was scammed
00:20:11Alanisand so he he came from his um he's from a US Territory he came here and basically was like yeah I want to get rid of the life that I had there wasn't a great life but I wanted to I want to
00:20:24Alaniscreate something so that my family can learn from me I was like great I'm here to I'm here to help you and so basically uh he used me I paid for a lot of things I would drive from 5: in the morning to
00:20:36Alanisbring him to work pick him up at 3:00 and you know and bring him home and I would spend all the time and what I got called was I used him I cheated on him I
00:20:46Alanisdid all these things and I was there and when I was pregnant I was actually in Colombia I was going to work with my lum's team and that's been my dream to do music ever since I was five and he
00:20:59Alanisbroke up with me and then I found out that I was pregnant and basically uh we got back together and um when I was back I moved everything moved my schools
00:21:10Alanismoved I had no car I had nothing and when I had nothing I was discarded he looked for somebody else so now when I see a man I'm like okay what are you going to do well how are you going to serve me because I can serve you I'm
00:21:23Alanisvery traditional I will help you but what are you going to serve me it's not like a a a 7525 it's a 5050 not on everything but how you're going to treat the other person you know
00:21:35Nala Raywhat I'm saying right I think women have like way higher standards nowadays for men because of this issue and I actually get asked that a lot on my social medias about like you know men literally asking me like why do girls have such high
00:21:47Alanisstandards now for us like y'all aren't doing anything look the high stand the high standards because I got left with a child by myself and um she she's doing
00:21:57Alanisgreat uh you know um did you ever get back to working with maluma or just that messed up it's a I've been taking a 2-year sabatical because this was a lot
00:22:08Alanisemotionally I thought it was endgame with this guy and so basically um I have to go back to Colombia it's a whole money thing too so I have to work again
00:22:18Alanisbut I am recording music again that is that is happening so yeah um but you know things happen but that's where my high standards come from and I think I'm looking looking for somebody who is
00:22:30Nala Rayhigher when it comes to financial than what I am right now well they're definitely out there so it's not like every man is just like a crap hole you know like there are so many men out there who are so willing to work and know that that is their role as a
00:22:43Nala Rayprovider and know that they that is their role in the family you know and are looking for that too so definitely don't get discouraged so before we get into your specific anecdote with this
00:22:53Brian Atlasguy and you provided quite a bit of details as to the story and what uh I'll save the anecdote for later but
00:23:05Alanisso very picky so what are your standards so basically um so let's talk physical let's talk personality traits let's talk pH So Physical I'm not really picky when
00:23:16Alanisit comes to physical I mean um currently right now I used to be really skinny now I'm on a weight loss I have PCOS so I don't care I learned everything physically um honestly I he had just has
00:23:28Alanisto be taller than me I'm 5'5 and a half so that's it um that's pretty easy and would like to be fit she's 5'11 like um yeah I think that's it I like
00:23:39Alanissomebody who's really well groomed and your teeth say everything my mom told me you look at somebody's teeth you can tell how their hygiene is yeah so I teeth teeth hygiene is really big for me
00:23:52Alanisum but that's like not their but not their weight no why not would be a hygi how's that not related to hygiene um some people have issues yeah like I I
00:24:03Alaniscouldn't lose I had really hard time losing weight cuz I have PCOS so I understand that sometimes there's like diseases and issues involved and so I don't think weight is such a big issue
00:24:15Andrew Wilsonyeah but that's the same thing with teeth disease is an issue so like if we're just talking about what's generally true I would say that most people generally are overweight not due to a medical issue but because they can't put the fork down right because of
00:24:27Andrew Wilsonaddictive food or whatever whatever other thing that you want to point at and the same thing with teeth I would say that people who have bad teeth some of them could be affected by diseases and that's terrible most of them probably just don't take very good care
00:24:39Mandyof their teeth right that that makes the most amount of sense right mhm I kind of agree like I think that um most people who are like not everyone obviously like there are people who have issues but
00:24:51Mandymajority of people especially men who are obese because they don't really get PCOS um it's literally just a self-control thing and I'm not saying that's the case for
00:25:04Mandyeveryone and I'm not saying that everyone has an easy time losing weight cuz obviously it's not an easy thing but I do think that it does I I agree I think it does have to do with hygiene
00:25:15Nala Rayand you're taking care of yourself like by having a good diet you know so I think that that is kind of important in my opinion or maybe they're not even there physically yet but they're on their way there like that
00:25:31Alanisthey're making progress it yeah I think that's like to clarify like I would I don't matter the weight but like if I want to see somebody who like like I said who wants to go to the gym who wants to like do this stuff you know what I'm saying it's not or it's just
00:25:44Nala Raydoing it you know like hey I'm going to the gym two times a week like I realize like I'm not in the place that I want to be at for myself or for my future partner but hey I'm getting there that that's I think another oh sorry I think
00:25:56JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)another thing is that like the teeth thing I do I think is like very valid cuz like weight loss can take a long time building muscle sorry building muscle takes a long time but brushing
00:26:07JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)your teeth you know flossing going to dentist can be expensive but if you go like once a year that's fine like taking care of your teeth is an everyday thing going to the gym is an everyday thing
00:26:18JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)but taking the brushing your teeth it's a one minute two minute thing it's not something that's going to take you a a whole month to get used to I would say that more people are born with bad teeth
00:26:29Andrew Wilsonand are born obese right are you speaking personally or that's not a dig well when we say bad teeth are we talking about sorry just speaking just
00:26:39Andrew Wilsonspeaking in uh in generalities right I would say that most people that people are born with bad teeth a lot more than they're born with a precondition towards obesity that's not a thing which is I mean that's this is a brand new thing in
00:26:52Nala Rayin The Human Condition right no no absolutely no one can't the fact that they're born with crooked teeth and it may be a little bit harder to to clean their teeth although they're still taking the strides to do it just because you don't have straight Perfect Teeth
00:27:03TTS/Donationsdoesn't mean you're unhealthy yeah that's not I never must be real right like bore cheesy cheese 69 donated $200 chair one how does it feel to be
00:27:14TTS/Donationsfrom South Carolina where people can play football but not spell it # strong chre look like a horror movie
00:27:24Brian AtlasMuppet keep it up Brian and Andrew Sou I'm not from South Carolina you want to respond to the Muppet accusations Muppet accusations wait did I miss something oh yeah so chair one
00:27:35Mandychair 2 chair three chair four okay um I mean cool if you think I look like a muppet that's cool I mean dude The Muppets made a lot ofie Muppet I'll make
00:27:45Mandya lot of money if you're in a movie you a horror movie about Muppets that's cool get that bank exactly uh we were talking about teeth
00:27:56Alanisyeah I know I feel like you meant like cleanliness yeah that's what I mean cleanliness I don't mean like crooked like it just if you have clean teeth you brush your teeth here so just opening this up to the whole panel uh are you
00:28:09Nala Raypicky well you're married but well I'm married I was picky yeah absolutely I get really mattered to me like what not only like what he looked like I want to be attracted to you physically but you know obviously people are going to age
00:28:21Nala Raythrough life but in this moment I want to be attracted to you and then personality is such a big thing like I need to be be able to laugh with you and joke around and pick on each other a
00:28:31Nala Raylittle bit not like hatefully but like I like that like rhetoric like oh yeah like dude I call my husband a potato he calls me an onion like it's like just stupid stuff like that but it makes me
00:28:44Nala Raylaugh it makes him laugh like I love that stuff so personality is such a big thing I love to laugh like it's my biggest thing I love to be cheerful um and then did he call you an onion cuz
00:28:54Nala Rayyou make him cry I said that today in the car I was like do you call me NY cuz I make you cry actually not at all this boy does not cry at all unless it's like a Disney movie which is really cute by
00:29:05Nala Raythe way like so cute but he doesn't like cry in real life but I call him potato because he's caramel colored what so he's like really tan yeah uh he's half
00:29:17Nala Rayblack I can call him that though so yeah I don't know I love this like energy that we give each other that's like constantly like if if I'm having a
00:29:28Nala Raybad day he can lift me up and he knows the ways to lift me up and the same with him like if he's having a bad day I know what it takes to get him up off the ground should should we uh he's here with you right yeah he's somewhere
00:29:40Brian Atlasaround town should we should we get him on the show later what do you think like like a cameo like coming 30 minutes yes love that yeah maybe later uh dude he's
00:29:50Nala Ray6'4 uh height was a big thing for me cuz I'm 5'6 I wanted a tall man cuz I want nice athletic babies you know so yeah that could be interesting um maybe we can arrange that later on take down
00:30:03TTS/Donationsyeah okay that'd be interesting uh we have this coming through yo Metro mat donated $200 thank you Matt you being overweight has nothing to do with poos and everything to do with what you put
00:30:14Alanisin your mouth and your lack of activity plenty of women with it that don't get heavy cope okay I mean I'm a healthc care
00:30:24Alanismajor so I know more I mean it doesn't bother me I don't care I know I have PCOS I did the the testing came out positive I take metformin I'm going I
00:30:35Alanisalso just had a baby by the way so like you gain weight with the baby I and you can gain up to 150 lbs legit so I don't care you can say what you want to say I
00:30:47Alanisknow my life I know that I go and I exercise I go to the gym every other day that's it all right
00:30:55Noracool are you picky I would say yeah but mostly mindset wise like I look for a guy who's like is on his [ __ ] who is
00:31:07Noradisciplined who's like has consistency in like things and that just like shows me what his future is look like also I look at his dad I'm like if his dad is
00:31:16Norainformed he will be informed too if his dad is like you know then he can when you say inform you mean physically or yes physically and also just like what is M where his mind at Dad if he's like
00:31:28Norastill like childish with his like wife and just like jokes around has a lot of banther then banter it's the best yes yes but of course I'm picky and just like wait long how long have you been in
00:31:41Brian Atlasthe US for just curious uh two and a half years and you came from Germany right yes okay do they uh is fra lion still
00:31:52Nala Rayemployed F fine yeah do you do people still say that he said fine I'm thinking like are you a FR
00:32:03Noraline I don't even know what how do you say it frine frine FR line frine you mean line what does this mean like a classy woman like a a little [Music]
00:32:17Norafrine um like deir is it not yes very very deir very classy I would say I would say I am because I'm just sure
00:32:30TTS/Donationswhatever fan donated $200 looking at this panel in the chat is going to have a barbecue roast tonight Ryan get the delusion calculator out let Andrew cook yo whatever Fam
00:32:43Brian Atlasthank you so much for the TTS man really appreciate it um yeah it's going to be an interesting show okay so very picky it sounds like very picky what about
00:32:52Noraheight height matter no no okay not really no my dad is smaller than me your dad's short wow how tall are you uh 5'6 5'6
00:33:03Noraokay yeah huh okay your mom taller my mom's taller yeah oh good for your dad good for him exactly how did he pull this how I don't understand German R
00:33:15Brian Atlassome some men like taller women that aggressiveness yes all right uh are you picky see you would have to Define picky for me like as an attractive physical
00:33:27Brian Atlastrait could be like personality it could be what they're bringing to the table money yes and no like cuz I have I mean I have to be
00:33:38Mandyphysically attracted to the person I'm with I'm sorry like I don't like they don't have to be like a model of smoke show like I'm I have my current boyfriend like he looks amazing for me
00:33:49Mandyokay but I don't think I wouldn't consider myself picky like I don't need someone who makes you know a million dollars I don't need someone who's like
00:34:00MandyI don't know I I don't consider myself picky in that sense really okay I I don't know uh were you picky before you got married no I'm not picky not picky I
00:34:13Vithink the things I want are pretty basic and um if anything it's just if they're willing to be up for the task like to be a father I'm not picking at all wait do
00:34:22Brian Atlasyou have kids I do I have two oh okay M from your current nope oh didn't didn't get that part wait so hold on let's rewind a bit uh so you've been
00:34:33Brian Atlasmarried for two years almost two years yeah uh two kids from was that from the four-year relationship you said n mm- uh
00:34:43Brian Atlasthey're from scattered relationships oh two kids two fathers mhm okay I see and are you going to have kids with your husband or we want to adopt oh adopt
00:34:55Vithat's so sweet yeah so we talked about adopting and or having a kid okay yep um how were you when you
00:35:06Brian Atlashad your first kid I was almost 21 almost 21 okay how old were you when you had your second kid uh 2016 26 okay and
00:35:16Brian Atlastwo different fathers right mhm I see okay huh okay and you're going to adopt I want to adopt yeah we want to adopt does he have kids from a different relationship none no kids mhm okay he
00:35:28Brian Atlaswants to adopt though too he wants his own and to adopt if we can God cuz the process is
00:35:37Brian Atlasnot that easy so huh yeah okay all right uh are you picky I think so I'm like I don't really
00:35:47JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)have any results to base it off but um I'm tall I'm 5'11 so I would like a guy who's taller than me just cuz I want
00:35:58Brian Atlasathletic babies oh yeah man but so when you say taller than you like six foot okay or it's got to be like three four if it's an inch tall to me that's that's
00:36:07JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)totally fine I just have to be able to you know not see over his head um um good
00:36:15JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)night but um but so the cut off there is a cut off like there is a cut off 51 511 511 is proba the cut off so wouldn't date 510 you know if it's person personality
00:36:28Brian Atlasand he looks got make he's got makeup for it got the lethal face card or whatever I think cuz for me you know protection is such a big thing um wait
00:36:39JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)protection like I want a guy who is you know that's why I want to be taller and stronger I want a gym guy cuz I I like I want to be able to feel protected when
00:36:49JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)we go out I want someone who can like um you know suddenly a fight starts out or some for some reason he'll be able to be there protect me I just protection
00:36:59Brian Atlasself-defense has always been a big big part of my life wait so could a guy if the I guess the reason is for protection could a guy make up for it for example let's say he's like he's a trained MMA
00:37:12Brian Atlasfighter but he's like 5'9 and 160 lbs she's like no only here's an easy one like what if
00:37:24JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)he's what if he's a lot shorter than you but he carries an Uzi see I do want to carry guns so that's kind of like already already a set and sewn thing so it's just more of also a
00:37:36JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)preference it's not only protection but I like to say protection is like the biggest reason but um mostly it's also a preference obviously guys who are taller tend to be more attractive to women but
00:37:48Brian AtlasI think I fall into that stereotype okay but personality is also a very big thing for me I think but would you rather date like that five 9 professional MMA fighter who could or
00:38:01Brian Atlasthe like 6'4 230 lb guy who hasn't trained a day in his life who like if he went up One V one against
00:38:11JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)the MMA guy would probably get [ __ ] up I feel like also most guys who are not trained no matter what will get [ __ ] up by a MMA fighter no M no matter what
00:38:22JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)height unless got a point no one um it's I think I think at that point
00:38:30JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)when it comes if he's that height 5'9 which is it's like what around here to me I mean I
00:38:43JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)love here sorry sorry I'm like I'm like misjudging um but maybe like right here yeah right there you know what if he's got that lethal face card and he's able
00:38:55Brian Atlasto protect me you know I'm okay with that uh so okay but so there's the height anything else you said Jim physically fit physically um what if what if he can't beat you in tenis that's I'll
00:39:07JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)teach him you'll teach him I'll teach him all right but um for me Christianity is a very very big thing okay you know yeah he he has to be a Christian and you know if he's not a Christian already then I would love it if he would go to
00:39:20JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)church with me um you know make an effort to like join me in my faith cuz Christianity Ty of um what type of Christian I'm a Reformed Presbyterian so would he have to be a
00:39:32JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)presbyterian I think there's like a um a big like broad spectrum of denominations so as long as he has like similar beliefs and as long as he proclaims
00:39:43JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)Jesus as his King then you know I'm okay with that like what if he denied the Trinity for instance see I don't I can't do that he Trinity Trinity is a big part of my belief so if he doesn't believe in
00:39:56Andrew Wilsonthe trinity then sorry so then so then the criteria for Presbyterian is pretty specific
00:40:05JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)right there's some values it's not just Presbyterian it's of most denominations have Trinity as a big part of it yeah yeah I understand but what I'm
00:40:16Andrew Wilsonsaying to you is that this is a specific criteria still right there's plenty of unitarians for instance who identify as being Christians um but if the if the value set is
00:40:27JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)Presbyterian if they have some value set which is in contrary to that would you still be with that person is the question I think that would be something we talk about because you know there are
00:40:40JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)a lot of beliefs that I'm not going to say I want them to change for me but it's possible that we can talk about it and see like why do you believe this like what evidence you have to support this you know it's not something that's
00:40:53JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)just set in stone like you can never change it I'm also I'm also okay with changing as well I'm like I have a very set and stone belief but you know if you're able to convince me that this is
00:41:03JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)the truth then I'm okay I will I will follow that but I am very what if they were catholic for instance I'm I don't know I don't think I would be with especially since
00:41:15JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)Catholic does have a very big like Contracting sorry contri contradicting thank you thank you contradicting with Christianity you know that's also
00:41:25JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)something we'll talk about I mean I was interested in a guy who was Jewish and you know I was willing to talk with him we just never got anywhere so there's a
00:41:34JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)lot of talking that could be there would you did an Orthodox Christian um I'm actually going to an
00:41:43JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)orthodox Presbyterian church right now so that's not that's not uh Orthodox at all okay well then I don't know I've never really met an orthodox person so I
00:41:54Alanisdon't really know their beliefs if I can introd interject um Orthodox uh they're more like Catholics they just have different stuff cuz I'm Catholic and I went to a Catholic school so wearn are
00:42:05Alanismore like Orthodox but yeah we're kind of the same that's how I would put it also like going to the point where you said like Catholics not really a lot of
00:42:14AlanisCatholics my age aren't really like they don't strictly follow the faith because of a lot of contradictions I think it's more like just have a conversation with them that I can speak as as a Catholic
00:42:28Alanisjust have a conversation with them because there's a lot of things that they say that I feel like it's very contradicting and I'm like okay I think my relationship's with God and I go to church and I follow the sacraments and
00:42:39AlanisI'm like okay I went to church I'm doing all these things but there's some things that I'm like okay well that's a little harsh what about someone who was like non-denominational and didn't believe in
00:42:50JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)religion but but believed in like a relationship with you know the Trinity yeah um I totally support that you know I'm a really big believer in like talking to people and like preaching the
00:43:01JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)word of God um I go to a Christian School for a reason so um I I think just a lot of these like situations a lot of these issues can completely be like solved just through talking absolutely
00:43:14JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)and like settling differences learning differences you know there's a lot of Education that can go in talking about Christianity so there's a lot of you know talking conversations there really
00:43:25Nala Rayis because as the man of the household he should be leading you spiritually too like you're both there to support each other spiritually but like as the man of the house the spiritual leader you should agree on the exact same thing
00:43:38Nala Raybecause that can bring so much chaos like down the road if you don't you know so that's really good I like your viewpoints thank you here I got to finish up with this but very picky are
00:43:48Natalieyou picky yeah I'm really picky I'm also a Christian and I'm waiting for marriage that's been my intent since I was like a little girl and um looking for a Christian man who wants a second
00:43:59Natalieamendment rights he believes in guns let's go cuz I want to be strapped one day cuz I'll be I'll be 21 soon so I want to conceal Carrie that's my goal to
00:44:10Natalieprotect myself I've been in a situation where like I was kind of like assaulted in a way um not like constitutional carry in Texas I know she wants to bust a cat bro I know if I need to protect
00:44:22Nataliemyself I have a way to protect myself cuz a lot of times like guys are always stronger than girls no matter what I have a twin brother and I grew up wrestling him like all the time and I used to win cuz I used to be bigger and was proud of it now I would not be proud
00:44:34Natalieof it but he's way bigger and he can throw me across a room so easily just picking me up so like if I need to protect myself against a man I can't cuz he can e I'm 5'4 I'm short I'm small he
00:44:44Nataliecan easily pick me up so if I have a gun I can just protect myself if I need to I have pepper spray right now but I don't have a gun yet get a taser for sure dude get a taser dude if you get a gun get like a Sig m17
00:44:57Natalie[Music] or an AR yes I can't own one yet know exactly but like I believe my man should be able to protect me yep and I'm 5'4 so I mean he doesn't have to be that much taller than me as long as I'm wearing
00:45:09Brian Atlasheels and he's a little bit taller yeah and you said uh wait so you're you're also a virgin is that correct also a virgin okay waiting until marriage yes uh anything on the more physical front
00:45:21Natalieheight anything like that I love a thick guy I love she want a coat a winter coat guy yes I need like a like a thick guy teddy bear a pet
00:45:33NatalieGriffin huh like like a Peter Griffin no not like a Peter Griffin like a muscular thick i r i run track so I say like a thrower thick not like what's your ideal weight for a guy oh see that's hard
00:45:45Nataliebecause muscle is heavier IT muscle is heavier than fat 215 it's like a thick guy I love that
00:45:53JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)Dam I love that hey all right so what about you a little chunky um I wouldn't say I'm picky I have I think I have standards but I think that's what
00:46:04Brian Atlaseveryone has but I'm just I'm not picky I'll date my my one of my exes is shorter than me so okay um one last question on that here in just a sec
00:46:15TTS/Donationssomeone donated $200 what if the guy was awesome Christian Etc but he lived far away from you and couldn't move so this is for you
00:46:25JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)too I looked at you um let's see I've never done long distance before um actually one of my
00:46:33JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)situationships was long distance and it didn't last a month um well he was being very dry and I just I I couldn't do that cuz he wasn't responding but um I've
00:46:46JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)never done long distance I I'm I don't mind giving it a try I have a whole bunch of friends who it didn't work for so if it works for me that's okay and you know when I get old enough and I can
00:46:58JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)go see him on my own then I'm sure we'll have a good time but hopefully I meet him before we do the long distance okay what about you would you do long distance yeah I would agree with that I
00:47:10Natalietried long distance for a little bit it didn't really work out that well I feel like you need a base relationship in person and personally for me I rather be friends first then date them something's like a little less awkward like I know them more um but I've had situationship
00:47:22Natalieand it was long distance didn't really work out that well uh just because of how far away he was he's a great Christian I still pray for him here and there just kept in touch that way but um he's watching this crying I know I'd be
00:47:35Natalielike please don't be watching this right now you know who you are please actually no we need the views but please no but I would say I want to like have it in person first then try the long
00:47:46Nataliedistance because I want that physical like iners connection I'm B like physical touch person and if you're yes if you're long distance you can't do that like I love hugs um so so actually me and my husband did that we were long
00:47:59Nala Raydistance um first and we became great friends he lived in Virginia I lived in California so complete opposite ends of America and we grew the best friendship possible like we actually met on Tik Tok and then just started FaceTiming like
00:48:12Nala Rayevery day nothing was sexual and he was like the first man that ever came into my life that didn't treat me sexually and was just wanting to be a friend just wanted to get to know me just wanted to learn my personality just to be friends like he made that very clear I made that
00:48:25Nala Rayvery clear I was like dude I'm on a serious single streak right now like I'm loving life right now so he came into my life we became great friends met up for the first time in Nashville and stayed
00:48:36Nala Rayin very different hotels and we were just happy to like combine our friendship there in person nothing got sexual it was just hanging out I was like dude I love this guy like he's chill with me he doesn't treat me like
00:48:49Nala Rayan object like literally everyone else does and then that grew into something so beautiful and he had requirements as a Christian man he led me to Christ and showed me God's love through just
00:49:00Nala Raytreating me right was sending me Bible verses and praying over me and just like so encouraging to me over the phone over text messages and continue to show Christ's love no matter what and respect
00:49:11Nala Rayto me and then he was like he was like dude I can't date you you're on only fans I was like he's like that's just me and like you know what I'm saying and I was like okay I understand and I respect that you know and then like one day he
00:49:23Nala Raysent me this really long voice note just encouraging me and telling me and such a loving way that God had something so much better for my life than this and I was like no shot and so that's what kind of started my walk with Christ I started
00:49:36Nala Rayfeeling super convicted over what I was doing in my life and it hit so deep so and then I got saved very shortly after but then there was no promise of us even getting together I was like if I'm doing this I'm doing this for Christ and not
00:49:48Nala Rayyou because at the end of the day God has somebody for me regardless and and then and then later on he asked me to be his girlfriend and then literally like within 3 months we got married cuz we
00:49:58Nala Rayknew it was right so but yeah it was awesome it was awesome so don't be don't be afraid for long distance no don't be it gives you this longing for them
00:50:08Nala Raythat's like it's so it's so perfect like you just get to know them without even touching and physical Touch Is My love language and so that was hard for me but his love language is quality time so he
00:50:20Nala Raywas feeling loved like just being on the phone with me so I was like that's really cool yeah that's so sweet uh last thing on the picky thing just curious uh do do any of you here have and I know
00:50:31Brian Atlasmaybe some of you are a bit on the young side so money hasn't quite yet or not yet become really a factor so much when it comes to your dating but let's assume you know when you're in your mid 20s or
00:50:43Brian Atlasyou know the guy who you eventually will marry do you have a sense of how much you would like your partner to be earning I know some of you are already in a relationship so some of you might
00:50:55Brian Atlassay oh he's got to make six figures this sort of thing Nala I don't know if I should even ask the people who are in relationships this but why don't we start with you then I mean I'm already making a good amount of money and doing
00:51:07Norathe only fans yes and doing like investing in stocks investing in Bitcoins and like you're going to dat the guy who works at McDonald's I Bri cheese burgs
00:51:19Norayeah I'm like I'm I'm not interested in a guy who's really just money fixed and just money focused because the end of the day because I have to United States is so expensive especially for
00:51:31Norainternational he also be money fixed no if he has a good like system with his parents and they support him good since you dat a guy who lives with his parents
00:51:41Norano when you're 25 no oh relation okay when I'm 25 okay okay different story he should have a financial plan okay for
00:51:52Nala Rayhis future yeah what's wrong with living with your parents nothing I don't think there's anything wrong with it no no most girls won't take the guy who lives no I understand that but sometimes it's like for people who so my husband got
00:52:04Nala Rayout of the military he's a disabled vet and went back to go live with his parents to get on his his like feet on the ground and cuz like you know the military treats you like crap after you're out like even when you're in they treat you like crap so then he got back
00:52:18Nala Rayon his feet and started being like a huge live streamer and that was so supportive so it was just like I don't know sometimes it's just to like get your grounds again sorry go ahead it's it's true so do you have just uh just so
00:52:31Brian AtlasI can move things along bare minimum income here in a year for the guy to make yeah like half a mill
00:52:42Brian Atlaswhat wait hold on this that's impressive if he can do that oh I don't care about how much money he makes a bare minimum
00:52:52Brian Atlashalf a million uh what is he doing [ __ ] deuts in [ __ ] like marks or some [ __ ] what the [ __ ] something
00:53:02Brian Atlasillegal oh do they still have de marks or re did I say Reich marks oh my God can't believe I just said that um Deutsch de marks it's Euro so they don't
00:53:15Brian Atlasuse that anymore um okay that's that's way too much right half a mill is way too much $500,000 that's a 1center average income
00:53:27Brian Atlasanyways wait before I get my uh feedback on this I want everybody's okay wait what's the average income yeah like what's the average income in like California I'm not entirely sure I think I think it's like 83 what's the average
00:53:40Brian Atlasincome in the United States though no it's not 83,000 in California is not the average income no maybe 60k I was thinking like 50k but California how do people live here off
00:53:52Andrew Wilson50k lots of roomates really don't they have a massive amounts of subsidies that they have to use that's the that's the business model for for California businesses is that they pay low
00:54:04Andrew Wilsonunderneath a certain threshold so that government subsidies will come in and take care of his it's corporate welfare uh so what about you bare minimum well personally I don't care
00:54:16Mandythat much about money like I could be dating like a literal broke guy but um preferably I would like pref for
00:54:26Mandyhim to have enough to at least like have like a stable life with me you know and I'm willing to contribute to that as well you know it's not like he's the only one that needs to be making
00:54:38Mandymoney but um as long as we're able to you know pay rent and put food on the table that's all I really care about okay maybe if you guys can just give me a number just are you just asking Rel U
00:54:49Brian Atlaspeople that are not yeah I guess maybe single is better I guess so A number yeah so I mean you're young you're 19 so but
00:54:58Brian Atlaslike uh fast forward you're 25 your future husband when he's in he's 25 or 30 25 30 how much do you think he should be making I don't I don't know
00:55:10JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)like a good number I think honestly whatever is average would be good enough to for me Aver is fun okay all right um
00:55:18Alanisso I dated a broke guy she like anything better than that so um my dad makes more than six figures and my brother makes more than six figures so yeah you can't
00:55:30Alanisdate them I no I'm going to this is what I'm saying I'm not dating them but that's my I I want somebody who is more than six figures
00:55:40JY / Jessica / Natalie (merged)maybe more than 5 mil 10 mil yeah damn yeah sorry what oh my goodness wait hold on hold on hold
00:55:54Brian Atlason uh yeah wait 5 mil a year uh yeah like 5 mil a year is a basic minimum hold on wait wait wait wait wait