00:00:16Brian Atlaswelcome to the whatever dating Talk podcast where we try to make sense of the modern dating hellscape I'm your host Brian Atlas thanks for tuning in tonight you could have been anywhere in the world but you're here with me I appreciate that we're coming to you live
00:00:28Brian Atlasfrom Santa Barbara California every Sunday Tuesday at 5:00 p.m. Pacific a few quick announcements this podcast is viewer supported heavy YouTube demonetization so please consider donating through streamlabs instead of
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00:02:21Brian Atlasshow I mentioned on the previous Tuesday show 30 minutes before the show started so I was served with a letter from a law firm saying that the previous guest is going to sue me I'm still unable at this moment by advice of my attorney to get
00:02:32Brian Atlasinto detail on that I do want to clarify the title of today's video does not pertain to that it pertains to a guest
00:02:41Brian Atlaswho was supposed to be here uh on time but is uh different uh but is running very late I don't even know if they're
00:02:51Brian Atlasgoing to end up making it who knows um so that pertains to different legal threats so just another week um um so maybe we'll get into those specific legal
00:03:03Brian Atlasthreats today maybe not we'll see disclaimer the views expressed by the guests do not necessarily reflect the views of the whatever Channel with that said without further Ado we're going to
00:03:13Brian Atlashave the guests introduce themselves so please tell us your name age location and occupation go ahead my name is Alyssa I'm 28 I'm a real estate agent
00:03:24Bella Cakesand I also um own a cleaning a residential cleaning LLC and I live in Austin all right welcome back what about you hi I'm Bella online I go by Bella
00:03:35Bella Cakescakes um I'm from Michigan I'm 21 and I do only fans and I also work at a coffee shop oh you're from Michigan yes you have you and Andrew uh crossed I didn't
00:03:46Brian Atlasknow that you were from Michigan but all right what about you or actually I'm sorry uh what do you do on only fans um I do sexual content well no [ __ ] well
00:03:57Bella Cakesyeah but like I just do like well I mean like some people do like you know General but I mean just like what do you mean by like what do you do like boy girl solo content oh I mean I do I do
00:04:08Jamiesolo and with my boyfriend okay got it what about you my name is Jamie I'm 24 I'm from uh Santa Barbara California um kind of in a break for work I'm doing
00:04:20Brian Atlasuh stay-at-home parenting yeah Santa Barbara California uh what were you doing for work before that I was is a par educator
00:04:31Brian Atlasokay uh oh in schooling uh have you gotten your Bachelor or no couple years at the city college yeah a couple years at city college what about you any
00:04:42Bella Cakesschool um I am in college right now but I studying I'm studying marketing but I prefer not to like talk about that stuff so well you don't you don't need to tell us where you go to scho just yeah so
00:04:54Alissayou're studying your major is marketing yes okay and then schooling for you yeah I'm halfway through with my Elementary education degree all right do you have a bachelor's yet or no no no but that's what I'm going towards also I mean I
00:05:06Yekahave like a certification to be a real estate agent because you have to go to school for that too got it I'm yeka I'm 35 uh I sell gold and silver and I am in
00:05:18YekaBastrop Texas it's a small town about 45 minutes outside of Austin and any school I went to culinary school like 14 years
00:05:27Yekaago okay all right silver and gold yeah yeah with a wise wolf copper you sell copper no but I I usually give out copper for free like with orders
00:05:39Toria Brooketitanium pelium okay all right what about you I'm Toria Brooke I'm 31 and I'm a citizen journalist and I also work for a senior
00:05:49Hedyadviser to president Trump all right and I'm in Palm Beach County and uh age 31 31 okay what about you hi my name is Hedy I'm 30 years old I'm originally
00:06:01Hedyfrom um Los Angeles area but I moved to Salt Lake City with my husband about 4 years ago and I'm in between jobs right now but I have a background and I have an art history degree and I'm in uh worked in interior design previously so
00:06:11HedyI'm just trying to find my footing see what I want to do stay at home wife all right uh I'm Morgan I'm 18 I go to Santa Barbara City College majoring in polyi all right Andrew yeah my name is Andrew
00:06:24Andrew WilsonWilson I'm the host of The Crucible it's a popular entertainment Channel on YouTube I'm a political analyst political saturnist and uh I engage in conversations and debates from time to
00:06:35Brian Atlastime all right I'm Brian Atlas 35 Santa Barbara California occupation washed up over the hill has been YouTuber and uh
00:06:45Brian Atlasso uh welcome everybody so we're going to go around the table and get everybody's relationship stus so are you like single in a relationship married whatever it is uh if you're single how long you've been single and what's the
00:06:58Alissalongest relationship you've you ever been in go ahead I'm single uh the longest relationship I had been in was 5 years was that your marriage
00:07:09Alissayeah so I guess I'm divorced well but then sort of because he did file for a retrial but it's going to also end in divorce I don't
00:07:18TTS Readerknow oh hey J for donated $200 yo thank you man Brian parah conversation please accept this donation as part of your
00:07:28TTS Readerlegal defense fund I appreciate you and Andrew and all that you do let's go boys get those legal donations in hey really uh appreciate it uh Nico sorry if I'm
00:07:39Brian Atlasnot pronouncing your name right but uh thank you so much man uh we'll talk more uh on uh Instagram thank you man uh single the divorce is finalized cuz last time you were on the show I believe
00:07:51Brian Atlasit was still kind of yeah it was being worked out or yeah yeah and who filed me okay yeah and then okay uh what about oh um and that was your longest
00:08:03Alissarelationship right yes how long when did the divorce go through it was finalized in July but we've separated you've been separated for a long time yeah since
00:08:13Brian Atlasyeah January you'll have to give us uh a recap actually yeah why don't you just
00:08:19Alissagive us a recap on that whole thing okay um I met I met my husband through a mutual friend um I came over to his
00:08:31Alissahouse twice and then kind of just never left and um we got married and had two kids and then divorced well I filed for divorce
00:08:42Alissawe split up like a year ago essentially and um have not seen or talked to him since I've you know tried reaching out on behalf of the kids to no avail um he
00:08:54Alissadidn't show up to the divorce the the first divorce trial so um I think he probably thought that like I wouldn't go through with it and if he just waited me out it wouldn't happen but it did and then like two days after we get the
00:09:07Alissadivorce decree essentially he files for a retrial and suddenly has a lawyer and like you know is fighting that now so um we're prepping to go to trial
00:09:18Andrew Wilsonagain I mean it defaulted to you right cuz you didn't show up yeah yeah so that's why he filed um yeah yeah what'd you get did you get everything I did so
00:09:30Alissathe only things that I asked for is like things that we agreed to before I filed um he has the house cuz he owned it before we were married and um I just asked for regular standard order custody which is for people who don't know he
00:09:43Alissawould get them every other weekend that's standard in Texas um I kept my car he kept his vehicles and like he pays their health insurance and
00:09:53Alissastuff Metro thank you for the gifted 20 go ahead continue um and then when it comes to child support like he didn't
00:10:01Brian Atlaspay it but after he filed for retrial I got it like once yeah so what I'm a little confused here so when you say um he didn't pay child support was it court
00:10:13Alissaordered child support Okay and like no financial support of the kids essentially since I left seen him at all no I've emailed him
00:10:26AlissaI've called him I actually just called him on their birthdays um cuz their birthdays just passed and he didn't answer so then I sent a follow-up email and he didn't answer that either
00:10:42Brian Atlasje but that's okay they're doing great like that feel like that got kind of heavy there for a second yeah a little bit yeah um wait so there is a child support order though from the
00:10:52Alissacourt yes and I got it once um but that's you know that's the extent of involvement he is asking for full custody now which is absurd
00:11:06Andrew Wilsonbut like I feel like it's an intimidation tactic though yeah I didn't expect it to start like this Jesus uh started out a bit heavier than you
00:11:19Andrew Wilsonthe US uh what what was he ordered to pay you um 2,300 a month okay plus back child support
00:11:30Alissaif I recall he's he's well off yes he he earns a substantial income yes but he was not well off when we met because last time like the comments accused me of like marrying a rich man and then forcing him to have kids that is not how
00:11:42Alissait happened he was like crippled when we met because he had just had back surgery but he like progressively um made more money as we got together cuz he's an old field electrician and so then he went to 99 about two years into us being married
00:11:55Brian Atlasand that's when he really started making money but he's the one who wanted kids to so so he paid the child support once
00:12:04Alissayeah when was the child support order granted officially in July okay um and then in September I got it once um yeah CU everybody was like oh
00:12:16Brian Atlasyeah she's probably big balling like where please tell me where well I mean just because he doesn't pay it doesn't mean he doesn't owe it yeah he owes it
00:12:25Alissabut you simply need to see your case man go to the court yeah I mean but there's a lot of people that are like hundreds of thousand dollars in back child
00:12:36Alissasupport debt that never pay it so I mean but I don't think he'll get to that point though because he has lose you can't get blood from a stone
00:12:45Alissabut he's financially well off so there are methods by which the court can compel yeah but that's why he's asking for full custody now so he won't have to
00:12:56Alissapay it but they're not that doesn't happen and he's not going to get full custody he might get shared like 50/50 at best but yeah in his mind that's
00:13:06Bella Cakeswhat's going to happen okay all right uh what about you um I am in a relationship and my longest relationship was 2 and A2 years all right is that your current
00:13:18Bella Cakesrelationship no um I have only had two relationships so the longest one was the 2 and a half years and then the current one I got with him in around well we started officially dating in June so
00:13:31Brian Atlasit's been about a few months now okay so uh 4 months yeah four months all right how did you guys meet Tinder Tinder all
00:13:43Brian Atlasright and uh really going going back to you really quick so there's been no guys in the picture uh no recently yeah there has oh okay do you have a roster no no I
00:13:54AlissaI see one person at a time um and then if I start like if I'm interested in one person I just kind of cut off everybody else I started dating like a few months ago maybe like in August um and there was one guy that I was seeing for a
00:14:07Alissalittle bit and um do you want me to hop into the X thing yet like or the crazy or wait for the dating
00:14:16Alissastories for that one uh so I like was seeing one guy is like not anything serious No
00:14:27AlissaLabel put on it just getting to know each other or whatever um but then I had a house break in so I was like I have an ex that has my handgun and I had another gun but
00:14:40Alissait's broken like the trigger is all the way back like it won't that's very dangerous so can't use that um and haven't gotten it fixed yet anyway had a house break in and I was content leaving the gun with my ex for the last few
00:14:52Alissayears and like you know cuz he lives like several hours away like four hours away um but after that I was like I'm going to get my gun and I don't care how how it
00:15:03Alissaends up I'm leaving with my gun and um so then yeah so then I like ran into my ex and then I guess we're talking
00:15:14Alissanow by talking you mean like it's like brand new so um is it
00:15:23TTS Readerexboyfriend Glock tavius donated $200 why is it that if if a woman sleeps with a bunch of men she's a Sloat but if
00:15:32Brian Atlasa man does the same thing then he's gay that's um that's a really good point wow
00:15:41Brian Atlasglavius um double standards are messed up that's pretty bad yeah yeah messed up okay um we can get into more of your stuff later what about you I am not
00:15:53Brian Atlassingle I've been in a relationship for 3 years that's the longest relationship I've ever been into okay and uh that's also your longest not married though
00:16:04Brian Atlasokay uh you have a child is that correct yeah he's 2 and a half years old okay and is it with your current partner yeah okay and uh wait two and a half years
00:16:14Jamieold but you've been together for three years little over three years a little over three years okay so you got knocked up on the first date yeah it happened
00:16:25Jamiepretty fast actually looking back it's um pretty funny but yeah like so you think it was like within the first week of meeting yeah
00:16:37Brian Atlasyou got pregnant and then we moved in uh together like around then too just immediately after meeting each other have you guys ever been like has it ever been on again off again or it's always
00:16:48Jamiebeen not really no no like we've had our our ups and downs in the relationship like I think any relationship but we've been we haven't had any break
00:17:02Brian Atlasand uh let's see so together for three years you got a kid
00:17:10Brian Atlasuh were like was it planned it was planned yeah wait so both wait planned within 4 days yeah um and he was like
00:17:23JamieI'm want to get you pregnant and you guys just mad is that how did it go down give us the details yeah all well when I met him he was 29 he's I think 33 now I was around like I think yeah he was oh
00:17:35Jamiehe was we said he wasm boyfriend and father of your child is you think he's 33 no he's turning 33 on in December okay but um like see when I met him he told me he was 28 he looked maybe even
00:17:47Jamieyounger than that but he his yeah he was 29 though but um he wanted to see him younger I guess by a year just kidding
00:17:55Brian Atlasum by a year yeah and so wait so but it was planned you said it was planned yeah so he was like well are you on birth control and you said nope yeah and then I said I could get pregnant and I think
00:18:08JamieI what was it like the first week of us daating he was like we would make some pretty beautiful kids and yeah I don't know I was let's try it
00:18:17Brian Atlasout yeah looking back it was a little fast but I'm would never First Sight yeah love it first sight for real and I wouldn't take it
00:18:27Yekaback well you know all right interesting uh what about you uh I've been single for almost 5 years now and the longest relationship I've been in was four
00:18:39Brian Atlasyears all right is that the one that ended five years ago uh no okay that ended like eight years ago so the most recent relationship that ended 5 years
00:18:51Brian Atlasago who ended it he did and then the four-year relationship your longest one who ended it I did okay uh and you've been single for five years have you been celibate for five years uh no three
00:19:03Brian Atlasthough you've been celibate for three years yes uh and then uh what's the in the fiveyear single period what's the longest period of time
00:19:15Brian Atlasthat you've been dating somebody uh in the five years like a probably few months yeah three or four months nothing serious
00:19:25Brian Atlasthough mm no I've never hav all right and you have a kid no kids no kids okay never married never married you don't have
00:19:36Brian Atlaskids I could have I mean I could be mistaken I I could have sworn on your Instagram there was a bunch of photos with you and a child probably my friends
00:19:46Yekaall have kids I have pictures with her kids and all my friends I love kids but I don't have any kids uh what about you longest relationship was 8 years and
00:19:57Brian AtlasI've been single for a year and a half single for a year and a half longest married nope no kid uh any kids and the single for a year and a half was it the
00:20:09Toria Brooke8year relationship that ended no it was not okay got it and you say you're from Texas right or I'm originally from New Jersey but right now I live in Florida yes oh W you got an accent you got to
00:20:22Toria Brookelive an accent well I grew up in New Jersey and then I also moved to Colorado when I was about four so I lived there till I was 12 okay maybe that influenced some of it was it like a rural part of I mean I I lived in various towns in
00:20:34HedyColorado yeah you got a you got a cool accent all right what about you I'm newly married I just got married in May and this is my longest relationship I've been with my husband for a little over
00:20:44Brian Atlasfour years now all right congrats thank you and you said it's your longest yeah relationship all right and uh God it oh
00:20:57Brian Atlasand you're how old again sorry 30 30 okay got it all right Morgan single longest
00:21:06Brian Atlasrelationship uh two and a half years mhm Andrew I'm married have been for a well over a decade all right cool that's everybody's relationship status so I'm
00:21:16Brian Atlasgoing to read the chat here real quick we have Greta Thanos holy crap can that first girl date asmin gold so she can clean his house and get him out of his
00:21:26Brian Atlasmom's attic who is that didn't we pull that up Asin Gold's Instagram he's a he's a twitch streamer yeah yeah maybe we'll ask well yeah uh I think you said
00:21:37Brian Atlasyou would date him I said I would I don't have no idea who it is oh wait wrong helmet that
00:21:47Brian Atlasokay hard it's here all right um and then
00:21:56Brian Atlasuh let's see what do we we have thank you Greta appreciate it if you guys want uh Reed is 100 TTS is 200 contribute to the uh legal defense fund guys and uh
00:22:09Brian Atlaslet me see here what do we have I'm going to get into the pre-show notes and um one moment guys one
00:22:21Brian Atlasmoment okay uh Clement what Clementine it's an Eternal Sunshine
00:22:29Brian Atlasala is your act uh and you you used to do but no longer do was it only fans and stripping correct yes many many years
00:22:39Brian Atlasago yeah uh what what were the uh big disagreements from last show that we had I think the only disagreement was
00:22:51Alissathat I think that you guys think that high body count is a bigger issue for like the majority of men in America than it really is because like I've never
00:23:02Alissabeen asked that ever um and I'm not even saying that it shouldn't be an issue because I agree that it should be personally mhm but that was yeah that
00:23:11Brian Atlaswas pretty much the only thing I'm sure there was more but um so okay body body count then um so I guess two questions for the panel and I before we actually
00:23:22Brian Atlasdive into any of these things I'll go around the entire panel and allow you guys to give us something so uh two things any disagreements that you have
00:23:33Brian Atlaswith either something that's for those I know some of you maybe have aren't as familiar with the show but any disagreements that you've either heard from me or from Andrew here any
00:23:44Brian Atlasdisagreements about the show and then secondly any uh dating topics that you want to touch on starting with you um
00:23:53Alissaokay so as aside from like what I just said I just think it's wild that you say Andrew that you don't even involve your wife in like like what you say just goes and it's not even a discussion because
00:24:06Andrew Wilsonyou don't even want to you don't care to deal with it it's not what I say pretty much no I just say if it is the case that I do do that right she doesn't have a say so when I feel
00:24:18Andrew Wilsoninclined to do so if necessary she doesn't have a say doesn't mean I don't involve her in any decision- making that would be absurd okay in fact I need to consult with her on many many many
00:24:27Andrew Wilsondifferent things because she runs the household but who cares maybe I just saw like one ultimately the position just is
00:24:37Andrew Wilsonif I decide not to involve her that's really that's my choice and not her choice and if I decide that we need to do something within the household that she may disagree with that's ultimately
00:24:50Andrew Wilsonmy choice doesn't mean I don't involve her in any decision making okay yeah I have a question do you think every relationship should be like that or is that just for you I think that um if if
00:25:01Andrew Wilsonmore relationships were run as a uh patriarchy where a woman submits and mans ahead the household that they would they would be a lot better for for both people involved I think biblically speaking what's going on in this country
00:25:14Toria Brookeright now part of the reason we're having so much Fallout even politically is because there aren't enough male leaders and figureheads and we need strong male leadership all around so I don't disagree with your Viewpoint I think there's obviously exceptions as
00:25:27Andrew Wilsonyou're kind of bringing up like there should be female involvement in certain decisions but I respect your view on that the problem is is that people always want to make arguments from outliers the kind of like um we're always looking at these small outliers
00:25:39Andrew Wilsonand going what about them we're not going to shape policy around outliers right we're not going to do that we're not going to shape society around outliers we're not going to do that uh that would be really stupid that would be the sacrifice of the whole for the
00:25:51Andrew Wilsonfew than the few for the whole so that would make that would make no sense like um yeah you can imagine that some people who possibly U you know stop signs may affect negatively I don't know I'm sure
00:26:03Andrew Wilsonthat they're out there I don't know how they're affected negatively by them but I don't give a [ __ ] right because we still need to have stop signs so I just I ultimately don't care I'm not going to
00:26:13Andrew Wilsonbe like oh well let's go ahead and redo everything when it comes to uh you know you stopping at an intersection because um because that affects your mental
00:26:23Bella Cakeshealth some [ __ ] sh like I agree with you like um I think there is like a biological aspect to like relationships and like gender roles and all that but I
00:26:34Bella Cakesthink that like in a relationship like you should have the decision to you know kind of have the dynamic that you
00:26:45Bella Cakeswant like if the woman wants to be the provider I think that should be like an option you know but like in general I do think that biology plays a part and that
00:26:57Andrew Wilsonin general men are more inclined to be the providers listen I I I agree that if a woman wants to be a provider she should be a provider I would just advise any man who is with a woman like that to
00:27:08Andrew Wilsonget the [ __ ] away from her that's all like I'm if a man and he wants that I'm not going to say I'm not going to say that they can't right that would be absurd and maybe there's some guy out
00:27:20Andrew Wilsonthere who's like oh I just can't wait to s for you queen or whatever you know whatever it is fine um but my advice to man life would be to get away from that woman it's probably going to end very badly and
00:27:35Brian Atlasprobably not the best idea okay was there I kind of want to just get everybody's disagreements before we dive
00:27:46Bella Cakesinto any of the particulars so was there more no I think that's it okay disagreements oh um so I kind of like already kind of stated like my stance but I do think that there is is like a
00:27:58Bella Cakesbiological aspect to like gender norms and like um you know like um just gender roles in society in general but I think that like in my relationship personally
00:28:10Bella Cakeslike I would like to be like a Trad wife like I want my husband to provide for me but I understand that there are women who don't want that and that's totally fine I've met like three yeah but it
00:28:20Bella Cakesseems like every time we reduce it they would prefer to stay at home yeah and you know I don't know like I think that um I just think it's important for
00:28:31Bella Cakespeople who don't want to follow that route to have the option to okay um yeah that's basically all and I do think another thing that was uh that I mentioned is that I do think that women
00:28:43Bella Cakeshave it a lot easier like in the dating realm um but I think that a lot of that comes with a lot of scrutiny as well
00:28:52Brian Atlaslike from you know like patri patriarchal ideals from society okay okay uh and that's a dating topic you want to hit on the women have it
00:29:04Brian Atlaseasier when it comes to dating yeah okay yeah we have that in the notes um any disagreements uh not really no okay any dating topics you want to hit on dating
00:29:14Jamietopics um no I guess anything I could add is that there should be stop signs as a compar well metaphorically there should be stop signs in certain areas on
00:29:23Jamiethe road but I completely agree like if somebody wants to be a tradwife uh and it works out for the family then that's cool but it also it also like if
00:29:36Jamieif somebody's going to be doing all of that work like all the house cleaning and such like they need to be provided for and I think that I get back to that and well in society now it's it's harder because you know things are so expensive
00:29:48Jamiefor like every family unit to do that like typically women have to work too in the family and um I just would hope in a perfect world um nobody would be putting
00:30:00Brian Atlasall of the responsibilities on one person in the uh family maybe we can just jump in now it it seemed like Andrew you wanted to uh you add something on this we can just
00:30:12Andrew Wilsonjump in now yeah well I just I just want to make sure I get the position down so if the the woman staying at home she should be provided for right yeah okay what does that look like uh it looks
00:30:23Jamielike taking care of the house taking care of the meals no her being Prov for what does that look like oh well provided for financially like what
00:30:34Andrew Wilsonshe what well women all kind of often tell me the there's like a Trope right well if I'm staying at home I'm cooking and cleaning and taking care of the kids basically right and I drive them to school and when they have a toothache
00:30:46Andrew Wilsonand when they're sick I take care of them blah blah blah blah blah I get all that what's the expectation for being provided for though what does that look like having everything you need and
00:30:58Andrew Wilsonnever that stressing out about it everything yeah but what is that when you say need does that mean like a bowl of GRL a day because that sustains you what does it look like living happily
00:31:08Jamielike getting getting being able to have all of the things that make somebody comfortable you know comfortable yeah yeah to live in Comfort yeah okay so you think that if you're going to be a
00:31:20Jamiestay-at home mom you should live in comfort you should have the things you need and some some of the things you want yeah this really doesn't tell me
00:31:29Andrew Wilsonanything so you say you should have the things you need okay needs a very uh subjective word right what do you need you need to sleep you need to drink water you need to eat food you need gas
00:31:41Andrew Wilsonyeah yeah you need stuff like that okay I get it you need those things but when it comes to comfort luxuries things like that what are the expectations there I have extra money I guess I mean
00:31:53Alissaif somebody's not uh to be working and they're they don't have an income so taking care of the house right okay but like some girls expect all the bills paid plus their nails done and their hair done and like their upkeep is that what you're saying
00:32:06Jamiewhat are your what are your expectations in other words for being provided for if you're staying at home if that's the agreement between the two well what are your what are your expectations well
00:32:17Andrew Wilsonhang on before we get to me can we finish on the inquiry here I'm just curious the statement is I stay at home and should be provided for I'm not disputing that I'm just trying to figure
00:32:28Andrew Wilsonout what that means what does it mean I'm being provided for does that mean my my food and board is taken care of and that's it or does that mean I get my hair and nails done x amount of weeks I
00:32:40Jamiehave my own account he puts money in it I get an allow like what does that mean yeah like being able to have some extra spending money I guess okay those are your year expectations yeah being able
00:32:52Jamieto like when you're working you can buy bigger things you know like a car right so it it's not a job to stay at home a responsibility in a sense yeah should he
00:33:03Jamiebuy you a car no I mean unless I need unless I need it and he's working and can afford it but if I don't need it then or want it I guess it also differ from person from couple to couple yeah
00:33:15Andrew WilsonI'm just trying to figure out a standard because the standard here was if woman stay home she should be taking it's not just her right it's just woman in general right they stay so I'm just trying to figure out what she thinks
00:33:26Bella Cakesthat means be provided for financially in needs and wants and wants yeah also well how where do we draw the line on wants I feel like Sor I feel like a good comparison to make and I hate to make
00:33:38Bella Cakesthis comparison is like how you would like take care of your child like kind of like buy them clothes like buy them you know give them the funds to do that kind of stuff and um I feel like that's kind of treat your woman like a child no
00:33:50Bella CakesI don't think you should treat her like a child I think that you should like when I when it comes to like doing the necessary funds for them I think that's a similar kind of like yeah
00:34:02Bella Cakesbut what is necessary what does that mean well what do you think it means well I'm I'm not making the claim I don't know well when you were talking so I'm not making the claim so the thing is is necessary I guess would mean like if
00:34:14Bella Cakesyou want to talk about needs like food shelter water hous I get those all of those are needs and then I think that if a woman isn't working and she can't provide for herself then the man should
00:34:25Andrew Wilsonprobably take care of everything else I mean there's Oliver wants well so hair and nails I guess what I'm getting at is like who makes who ultimately makes the decision on who provides what the man is
00:34:37Andrew Wilsonworking they make the decision together yeah what if they what if they can't agree then they shouldn't be together I agree great wow find someone you're comp with fix you fixed it simple fix awesome
00:34:48Andrew Wilsonwhat if we can't agree then get the [ __ ] out of here great that's awesome well no but I think this should be discussed at the beginning of a relationship CU people don't cuz people don't have things which come up in relation they disagree about all the time even after they've made an agreement before the
00:35:02Andrew Wilsonrelationship but you can mitigate the risks how by speaking about it ahead of time that doesn't mean that nothing will come up to change right so since we know that so then how do we answer this easily well here not looking for an easy
00:35:15Andrew Wilsonanswer right so then are we discussing just the initial we're discussing going to be happy at the end of this hang on let me answer to this we're discussing all of it so let's start with this this idea uh you have children right yes doesn't that change the dynamic in
00:35:27Andrew Wilsonrelation ship maybe for I mean to some extent to everybody it's going to change in regard to like finances no just in in Behavior just in Behavior period it's going to change the dynamic right now you two
00:35:39Andrew Wilsonhave to agree about another life too not just your own right so what I'm talking about is a threshold breaker where do we get to the threshold breaker where do we get to the point where like kind of tying it back to what you said earlier
00:35:51Andrew WilsonAndrew I can't believe you [ __ ] monster don't let your wife have a say in anything and it's like well okay one that would be absurd but two I'm giving you a great logical reason why right this second what happens when we hit a
00:36:03Andrew Wilsonthreshold breaker we can do one or two things we can do what you do and destroy our entire family because she didn't be together that's not okay that's dramatic perhap well hang on hang on how is it dramatic you said they shouldn't beet
00:36:15Andrew Wilsontogether that's dramatic the basis of first meeting not right so this so this is the question right you say why why does it have to be the man well the woman staying at home you're saying that
00:36:26Andrew Wilsonyou woman have wants that that are not Necessities I want things that aren't Necessities so who makes a determination she gets what she wants her if she's relying on the money from the man I mean
00:36:38Bella Cakesthat's actually fair if it that relationship has that Dynamic um I guess that would be but I I like again going back to like what I was saying before
00:36:48Bella Cakeslike I think like this is like a relationship like by relationship basis like it depends on the relationship like for you yeah we're entailing the
00:36:58Andrew Wilsonrelationship right now is the woman staying at answer individual so I agree in this situation we're entailing the relationship right this second we're saying in this relationship the woman's staying at home the man's providing not
00:37:11Andrew Wilsonjust for what her needs but for her wants as well so if he he's providing for needs and wants plus like for instance you might have all sorts of frivolous [ __ ] he doesn't care about guarantee you in fact he does right okay you going to spend money on that
00:37:22Andrew Wilsonfrivolous [ __ ] fine um guarantee you that there's going to be plenty of things that woman gets that he literally does not give a [ __ ] about right that's not really even going to be up for debate that's going to happen so if
00:37:34Andrew Wilsonthat's the case right who's the threshold breaker who gets to be the ultimate symmetry breaker the decision maker when the if he makes the money yeah I think from the onset of a relationship if a woman's looking for
00:37:46Toria Brookesomething that's a lavish lifestyle then she should be targeting a man who's going to provide that lifestyle and you can't expect that out of somebody who is not living that life so like if you're a blue collar guy that might not be making
00:37:58Toria Brookeas much as you know Audi Prince then if she wants a lavish lifestyle then she should not be going for that blue collar guy yeah well I agree that that's true I think that this is scalable so he's
00:38:09Alissasaying like what if he like loses income or something then how do you adjust he the point he's trying to get to is that if he makes the money ultimately he gets to decide what it's spent on to summ
00:38:21Andrew Wilsonwell I mean one one I would agree that yes that's true uh but also further I take it one step forward and say you actually because there's only two there's only two people who are in a relationship right unless you're a
00:38:34Andrew Wilson[ __ ] weirdo but normally you have mommy and you have Daddy absent blue-haired cumer Gremlin so um ultimately I would think since there's two you guys are going to have a disagreement at some point somebody has
00:38:46Andrew Wilsonto be the decider somebody's got to do it somebody has to be the one who breaks the Symmetry right I don't see a way around that I've never seen a way around it what if you had like a Rand number
00:38:58Andrew Wilsongenerator what's that what if you had like a random number generator and you like flipped a coin yeah okay so let's say you fli the coin and you still disagree well you have to go whatever the coin flips you don't have to do [ __ ]
00:39:10Andrew Wilsonright well I mean if that's the agreement you do definitively debate this yes you can definitively defens I'm sorry wait a second people don't change their mind all the time constantly consistently well if you're if you're
00:39:22Bella Cakesagreeing to flip a coin and whichever side it lands on you go with that then if you go back on that agreement and that relationship I suppose that two people could agree to flip a coin in
00:39:33Andrew Wilsonwherever it goes It goes but uh I think that that would be a really bad way toci one two um I still think that that would create more problems than it would help it would but I also think like when you
00:39:45Bella Cakessay that the man should make the decisions like how do you have conversations with your wife then do you like tell her what you're going to do or do you ask her first like well I think like any healthy relationship on planet
00:39:57Andrew WilsonEarth we have discussions about what we want to do why we want to do those things however right if there's any impass I'm just going to decide and there's many times can you give me like an example of like a time where you had
00:40:09Andrew Wilsonto put your foot down oh yeah it happens all the time especially with raising kids right all the time non-stop especially when it comes to discipline things like that okay you want this to happen I want that to happen I don't
00:40:20Andrew Wilson[ __ ] care it's going to happen this way okay I see very simple right very easy so like that wasn't really an example though was it yeah that's a great example discipline I don't want the I don't want ex uh discipline to
00:40:32Andrew Wilsonhappen or I don't I I think maybe this is too harsh or even this is too light we have a disagreement on that it's a perfect example of where okay I'll just be the Symmetry breaker okay ultimately I'm going to make the
00:40:43Bella Cakeschoice and I think that that's actually necessary yeah honestly I see like I said I don't think that it works in every relationship but like for me personally like I don't I don't like making decisions so I like having that
00:40:56Toria Brookein my relationship I think when there's a good balance of masculine and feminine energy if the man leads it allows women to sit in their feminine and that's what we're so desperately missing right now in this country like it's actually sad I
00:41:08Toria Brookemean I grew up with a single mother for the most part and I think no I think that for the most part from men yes I'm I'm I'm agreeing if we had not from women but from men if we had more of
00:41:20Toria Brookestrong relationships and nuclear family then women wouldn't be forced as much to work on their own as much as they are and they'd be able to rest more in their feminine so I think it's kind of a
00:41:29Andrew Wilsonthat's why I'm voting for camela to try to get back to that strong you mean fraudulent fraudulent femininity you don't you don't you don't like that I'm voting for comma hey to each their own
00:41:42Bella CakesI'm not the one making the vote are you actually he's okay I like he's trolling he's trolling all right all right so clip I was like maybe there's some
00:41:52Bella Cakessort of like I don't know like reverse psychology or something in v for her no no she well she said that she she has you know she like works for a senior oh yeah yeah so I thought that I thought
00:42:04Andrew Wilsonthat that would just introduce like pressure for no particularly good reason but anyway so uh so back to this yeah I think so I think it this will always be the case I think anytime you have two people or what you'd say two
00:42:17Andrew Wilsonconsciousnesses which come into contact they necessarily try to dominate each other no matter what no matter what I don't care what the circumstance is um there something like that is occurring so since I think something like that is
00:42:30Bella Cakesalways occurring I don't think it's any different in a relationship and one of the personalities is going to have to be dominant so they always going to have to be dominant my question is like so what about like in like a lesbian relationship like who do you think
00:42:42Bella Cakesthere's like uh like the but who cares they get the wor who cares well I mean like it's a it's it's a question like they exist like what do you think there also just I have a an additional
00:42:53Andrew Wilsonquestion also in dwarf dwarf relationships m like your comments on like that Dynamic I think that one should wear shoes that lift them an inch and then they got the advantage right um
00:43:05Bella Cakesokay so so back to this in lesbian Rel I don't care they're outliers so I I just literally that's fair I mean like so in okay so you do agree that there are straight like heterosexual relationships
00:43:17Andrew Wilsonwhere the woman is making the decision and that is healthy for that relationship I don't think it's usually healthy there could be I'm going to concede that logically there there's going to be some there has to be some
00:43:29Andrew Wilsonrelationship somewhere where some [ __ ] simp loser is letting his woman tell him what to do I don't think it's and he's totally okay with it like I agree no no not it's not rare that they
00:43:40Andrew Wilsondo it it's rare that they're okay with it that's what I think I think that they would prefer not to not to have that Dynamic even if they hav so I think a lot of those relationships they are not
00:43:51Andrew Wilsonhappy yeah like the women aren't happy either like perfect so I mean can I logically accept that such relationships occur of course and that there's some [ __ ] somewhere who just loves that
00:44:02Andrew Wilson[ __ ] yes there's guys who like getting their ball stomped on I know because I've had women on here who tell me that they paid them to do it so clearly there are insane lunatics all over the place
00:44:13Andrew Wilsonwho want crazy [ __ ] but who cares I'm not going to Advocate uh towards any of that because that's definitely the exception of the norm the exception of the regular I think generally right if if we were to take the whole into
00:44:25Andrew Wilsonconsideration the kind of best family Dynamic is cross-generational nuclear and since it's either cross-generational or nuclear that um because you need a mom
00:44:37Andrew Wilsonand a dad at home that you're going to have to defer to the man because generally his job is to protect the family and he's the one who can do that can is capable of and the woman usually is not and so since that's the case I
00:44:49Hedythink he gets to be the Symmetry breaker that seems completely reason-based to me um are there any areas in your Rel relationship where you do take your wife's advice cuz for example with my husband take her advice all the time
00:45:02Andrew Wilsonokay I just want to I mean there are some it goes like as I'm like honey I'm about to troll these stupid ass feminine what do you think of this tweet I have a question for you happens happens every day down um what do you think like
00:45:14Bella Cakeswomen's strengths are like compared to men their strengths yeah well in which way in every way because I feel like a lot of the
00:45:23Andrew Wilsontime like they can have kids NE well I was going to say also earli yeah I don't well listen I'm going to be totally honest with you and we why are
00:45:32Andrew Wilsonyou with by we can debate this right now and I'm going to enjoy it so uh here's my position women can have children men
00:45:42Andrew Wilsoncan't women are literally better at men than at nothing better than men literally at nothing on planet Earth however men have women completely and
00:45:54Andrew Wilsontotally beaten when it comes to force and the application Force did you know that Einstein stopped making discoveries when he left his lady you know that Einstein was [ __ ] like uh he was he he was [ __ ] a cousin or some like a
00:46:06Jamiefirst cousin probably something like this I'm not kidding wait I stopped no but what was the claim he stopped making discoveries when um he left his girlfriend her wife or she left him it's
00:46:18Hedyactually debated that they were all hers too exactly okay but women are also more nurturing and they're better wait when did Einstein meet his wife I don't know no no before his discoveries I used to
00:46:30Andrew Wilsonthink all of this [ __ ] I used to think just like you did right surely women are more nurturing and NOP nope the thing is
00:46:38Andrew Wilsonis that um externally the presentation that women are more nurturing socially this is much more acceptable that they present themselves as being more nurturing that doesn't actually mean
00:46:50Andrew Wilsonthat they are it just means that socially they present themselves as being so I've never been convinced that women are more nurturing than men uh ever I think that they perhaps do it in a different way than men do but I don't
00:47:02Andrew Wilsonthink men breastfeed I well how do you think men are ning so I already conceited right so two things one yes men can lactate just so you know but two right you probably didn't know that but
00:47:14Andrew Wilsonyes they they can uh it's the grossest [ __ ] ever but yes no sustenance two two um to this point I already conceded reproduction as being the only thing a
00:47:24Andrew Wilsonwoman uh can do that a man can't but you came from us so how would does that have to do with anything I also came from the reproductive genetic material of my father or did you think that women
00:47:36Andrew Wilsonunilaterally got sex or uh got pregnant do you think that they unilaterally get pregnant this on their own they're asexual snap their fingers and become pregnant or does it require male genetic
00:47:47Andrew Wilsonmaterial well why do you disagree that women are more inherently nurturing because when I look at the stats for abuse rates of children and things like this I used to think all sorts of things I used to to think that uh men were far
00:47:58Andrew Wilsonmore likely to essay than women it's not true I used to think that um wait what okay what exact stat is that yeah well actually I can pull them all up I'd like
00:48:07Andrew Wilsonto see it but if women and hang on hang on one second okay this is going to come as a shocking stunner to you but I'll I'll actually logically demonstrate it and then what I'm going to do when I'm
00:48:20Andrew Wilsonout having a smoke I will literally text these to Brian he can pull them all up on screen so that you can see all of the studies I have them all prepared prepared for this just for this conversation in case the day came where
00:48:30Bella Cakesit came up and today is that day kind of essay I'm asking is it like in general or is it like a specific kind it's even penetrative even penetrative essay yeah isn't that amazing so the
00:48:43Andrew Wilsonthing is is um here's why here's why this occurs it's because of reporting so I did not know this but there's a reclassification for uh penetrative essay so if men are not penetrated it's
00:48:54Andrew Wilsonnot counted as essay and that's insane that's absolutely [ __ ] insane so it's just they just completely don't count it I couldn't believe it so how did they gather the
00:49:06Andrew Wilsondata then by self-reporting the same way they do with women and so when they did all these studies with self-reports in colleges all over the place they found out that men were reporting that they were estate by women far more than women
00:49:17Andrew Wilsonwere reporting they were estate by men just that was stud they didn't go and make well again I'll pull them all up I don't remember all the authors off the top of my head um but yes this was done and repeated multiple times so no I
00:49:30Andrew Wilsondon't believe in this myth I've never believed in the myth and here I can even logically show you do you agree with me that things that women consider to be sa are usually overlooked with men an
00:49:41Andrew Wilsonexample of this if you're at a party and I walked over to at my age an 18-year-old girl who was randomly on a couch and started rubbing her shoulders you would be a [ __ ] creep in essaying
00:49:52Andrew Wilsonthe girl right yeah now take 40-year-old hot mom comes over to 18y boy on the couch rubs his shoulders probably not a big deal I think there's hang on hang on okay go ahead can you can see that
00:50:03Bella Cakesthat's probably not a big deal yeah I don't think one isn't because of how it's reported no NE I don't think that this kind of thing is a big deal I think
00:50:12Bella Cakesit's a difference in like when a man essays a woman like and I'm not and like this is like
00:50:21Bella Cakesin a vacuum necessarily so like usually when we're talking about essay like a man essaying a woman is like a lot more serious like well I'm not talking about
00:50:33Bella Cakesit's hard to it's hard to say that like not not a man as saying a woman is not more serious but like yeah um so imagine if I was making this claim the other way no I'm not saying just well just
00:50:46Andrew WilsonEnvision if I was making the claim the other way when a man essays a woman that's not a big deal you even imagine that no I'm just talking about like women fear do you fear women yes wait
00:50:57Brian Atlaswait can you just repeat hold on repeat your claim you said it was I I don't want to misquote you but you said something along the lines of it's not as big of a deal no I that's not what I meant okay well what did you say just
00:51:09Bella Cakesrepeat what you said okay so can I rephrase it though repeat what you said then you can rephrase okay so I said it's when we're talking about sa like a
00:51:18Bella Cakeslot of the time it is not as like serious when we're talking about like you know like uh it yeah are you talking
00:51:28Bella Cakesabout the method of abuse like physically well not meth yeah method yeah that apply to other forms of uh assault or violence well I mean it kind of goes into it because like you can
00:51:41Brian Atlasphysically abuse any crime that occurs to a woman is more serious it's not more serious but it usually impacts more harm yeah okay by a here let me let me ask you this so if a woman suffers a if a
00:51:52Bella Cakeswoman is a victim of a crime she is impacted more severely than men than a man usually yes because men are biologically stronger I
00:52:04Bella Cakessee what you're saying okay oh sorry so if the chick is really buff Well yeah if if a girl is really buff then and she beats her boyfriend's ass then yeah that's that's an anomaly like I woman
00:52:16Brian Atlasshe gets beat up let me let me ask you this so that's going to be less impactful than if she was weak so if uh a man gets shot in the head and a woman gets shot in the head is there a differential on the impact no because
00:52:29Hedythey're not using Force you're using a gun that's there is a differential if a woman gets punched in the face versus a man because women have less dense skulls
00:52:38Brian Atlasso right but both both men and women have the same capacity they just mad at us we're better at the same injury okay so do you think men are stronger than
00:52:48Andrew Wilsonwomen yeah okay so do you think men will hit harder than women okay so men will hit harder will hit a woman harder than a woman will hit a man but if I were to get into a fight with a really weak guy who started [ __ ] nobody would think
00:53:00Andrew Wilsontwice if I smacked him yeah but because that's an anomaly is no it's not an anomaly almost every time two men fight one is significantly stronger than another yeah it's a generalization women are generalization of what is standard
00:53:11Andrew Wilsonand so this I idea that oh because women happen to be weaker than men almost all men are weaker than other men it's but women do tend to get concussions more easily so even if
00:53:21Hedyyou're Austin right here she's right here if you're watching um like MMA for example if you watch the women's fights even between women women on women they
00:53:32Hedyum finish much quicker than they do with men because they they have uh less dense skulls and so they are um more susceptible to concussions earlier on as well okay well let us assume for a
00:53:42Andrew Wilsonmoment let us assume that men were far more likely to get concussions than women but were far stronger than women in every other regard which they are right now and if they hit them anywhere else it did way
00:53:54Andrew Wilsonmore damage okay you wouldn't you still make the recommendation that because there's a force differential that men didn't hit women even if women hit men wouldn't you still make the same recommendation even
00:54:06Andrew Wilsonif yeah of course so the concussion thing doesn't matter ultimately it doesn't matter if we're talking about the moral imperative right if a woman strikes a man then she you know she gets
00:54:18Andrew Wilsonhit back that's the way it works that's what you get you know what you know what that does is it teaches women not to hit men there was a really good bill bur bit on that by the way yeah I mean I mean I
00:54:30Bella Cakesdon't think anybody should be hitting anybody I just think me that's great there's usually a difference like I don't think anybody should get cancer you know yeah I mean and but they're going to and so the thing is is like
00:54:42Andrew Wilsonsince they're going to I want to have some kind of reasonable policy and some type of reasonable social policy around how you deal with the fact that because it's going to happen women get really mad they hit men for some reason
00:54:53Andrew Wilsonsocially unacceptable for men to hit them back and the answer to this is well it's because they're weaker and it's like okay but every time a man gets a fight with another with another man other man is also weaker than him most
00:55:04Bella Cakesof the time right one of them weer than other think there should be battered men shelters uh well what what is a battered woman sheltered exactly a woman who was
00:55:15Andrew Wilsonin a domestic violence relationship mhm and she's in a shelter for safety mhm yeah I mean I I would give those to men for different things for different why like false essay claims right but why
00:55:28Andrew Wilsonwouldn't you give it for physical he's too rich should his Iden what why wouldn't you give it for physical abuse uh well I don't think it would be necessary to do so why not because generally speaking I don't think most
00:55:39Bella Cakesmen would need that for physical damage okay so you think that women okay so do you think that men are more physically abusive than women no so then why so do you think battered
00:55:51Andrew Wilsonwomen shelter should be a thing I I mean I'm it's fine you can have a battered women if you want I guess yeah but men do cause a lot more damage is what she's trying to say well you
00:56:03Bella Cakescan't get mad at men cuz they're better at it no one's mad I think she's saying think about like sports like you have different Le for different for different like yeah unless somebody puts on a wig well I mean you I mean it's like
00:56:16Andrew Wilsonit's a comparison like you have different leagues for different strengths just like how women and men have different strengths well then I guess lightweights who take on heavy weights should have a battered Men Shelter she saying that what do you want
00:56:27Hedyme to say when women are um abused physically abused they are um they it's a lot more detrimental to their physical well-being and health yeah yeah okay I would say I
00:56:39Andrew Wilsonwould say that physically right they could take the short end of the stick because they're less strong yes but that does not mean it's more detrimental that's where I would have no hang on I