ADDRESSING DRAMA! Brian CONFRONTS Hater Girl Who Called The Podcast DUMB?! | Dating Talk #191

Date: 2024-08-28

Duration: 6h 54m

Guests

Brian Atlas

LLexi (Escort)>

PPayton (pay_irl)>

MMadison (SBCC)>

Identified Speakers

SPEAKER_00(audience)

SPEAKER_05Lexie(guest)

SPEAKER_06Payton(guest)

SPEAKER_07Brian Atlas(host)

SPEAKER_08Brian Atlas(host)

SPEAKER_09Riley(guest)

SPEAKER_10Madison(guest)

SPEAKER_11Ava(guest)

SPEAKER_13Fern(guest)

Key Moments

OtherFern reveals her ex-boyfriend had a sexual encounter with her male best friend.

“Fern explains her on-off boyfriend (100+ breakups) turned out to be on the DL. Someone told her after their final breakup. She reconciled with the best friend.”

OtherRiley openly says she would go on a date with Lexi over the Chilean soldier guest (a man) sitting at the table.

“Brian asks Riley if she would go on a date with the Chilean soldier (a male guest). Riley says no — and she would go on a date with Lexi instead. "Brutal mogged" reaction.”

OtherPayton physically intervened when her boyfriend was held at gunpoint.

“Payton describes being with her marijuana-dealing boyfriend when an acquaintance pulled a gun. She grabbed a bottle and smashed it over the attacker's head. Police report followed.”

OtherAva and friends sold their bikini bottoms to a man at a nude beach for $100 each.

“Ava describes how an older man at a nude beach offered to buy their panties for $100; they negotiated up, went to his car, and sold them. Describes preparing them for sniffing.”

ControversyBrian and Lexie argue about whether she can claim to want traditional treatment while doing sex work.

“Brian points out that Lexie does OnlyFans and escorting, so it's inconsistent to want traditional chivalrous treatment. Lexie says she wouldn't want her boyfriend doing those things anyway so it doesn't apply. Extended back-and-forth.”

OtherRiley's crack cocaine admission — viewer's "ex-boyfriend" donation claims she smoked crack with him.

“A viewer donates claiming to be Riley's ex and says she smoked crack with him. Riley denies it was recent. Admits to smoking crack twice in her life total.”

OtherMan vs bear debate: all four panelists prefer the bear, leading to discussion about male danger.

“Brian poses the would-you-rather with a random man or random bear in the forest. All women except Payton (contextual) choose bear. Discussion of what percentage of men are dangerous.”

OtherSelf-rating round: guests rate themselves 1-10 (no 7 allowed) and rate Brian.

“Ava 6.5, Riley 8, Fern face 8/total 5, Madison 5 (declines to rate Brian). Payton rates Brian 7.2. Fern and Riley rate Brian 4.5. Ava rates Brian 6. Chat says girls over-ranked themselves.”

OtherBrian addresses Jake Shields Twitter drama — responds to claim podcast divides sexes and Daily Wire buying the show.

“Brian reads his tweet response to Jake Shields, pointing out Jake appeared on similar format shows himself. Denies Daily Wire acquisition. Mentions Cernovich also stirred drama. Guests react. Old scammer drama update deferred.”

Topics Discussed

Show intro and guest introductions

Brian opens show. Guests introduce name, age, location, occupation. Pre-show no-shows mentioned. Kiki (plush cat) introduced.

Relationship status round

Riley: 6-month situationship, sees guy 3-4x/week, not exclusive, deleted Tinder. Ava: single a few months, ended relationship under 1 year ago, bisexual. Lexie: single ~3 years, celibate. Fern: single ~1 year, 8-month situationship cooling down. Payton: single 7 years, celibate 4 years. Madison: boyfriend (works for podcast).

STI testing and sexual health practices

Lexi advocates STI testing before every partner, dental dams, and "dick checks". Discussion of risks of oral sex and STIs. Riley shares vape with Lexi; Brian objects due to Lexie's sex work.

Who should pay on the first date

Ava and Fern: go 50/50 or expect man to pay if he explicitly invited. Riley: depends on invitation. Payton/Lexie: women should pay. Brian argues paying is the optimal chess move but questions whether modern women deserve chivalry. Payton offered to pay on recent dates, wonders if that was wrong.

Prostitution legalization debate

Should prostitution be legalized? Payton: should be illegal, including for buyers; would reduce harm to society including porn. Others: legalization makes it safer. Brian: doesn't think prostitution is good but uncertain on policy position.

Relationship transparency and body count

Should Brian disclose he never wants to marry? Should women disclose body count? Lexi's OnlyFans / sex work vs claiming to be traditional. Brian argues you can't claim chivalrous treatment if you're not a traditional woman.

Body count discussion

Is caring about body count immature or insecure? Riley: hypocritical if man has high count but demands low count from women. Fern and Lexie: preference, not immature. Lexie declines to state her number on this episode.

Man vs bear debate

Would you rather encounter a random man or random bear in the forest? Ava, Riley, Lexie, Fern: bear. Payton: man (contextual). Discussion of what percentage of men would victimize a woman. Estimates range: Lexie 50%, Riley 10%, Fern ~10-15%, Payton ~1-2%.

Feminism and gender equality

Are guests feminists? Definition debate. Discussion of legal equality vs social treatment differences. Women being tipped more than men. Male bias against male elementary school teachers. Military draft and selective service: should women register?

Racism and racial discrimination debate

Can you be racist towards white people? Riley argues racism requires power differential (prejudice+power definition). Brian pushes back with standard definition. Extended back-and-forth.

Self-ratings (1-10 scale, no 7)

Viewer "Stiffler" asks guests to rate looks 1-10 (can't pick 7). Ava: 6.5. Riley: 8. Fern: face 8 / total 5. Madison: 5. Payton: 6.5. Guests rate Brian: Payton 7.2, Fern 4.5, Riley 4.5, Ava 6. Madison declines (has a boyfriend). Chat calls girls over-ranked.

Pay gap and women in workforce

Brian argues doubling the labor pool by pushing women into workforce lowered wages and caused cost of living crisis. Mating pressure from women (providers) explains wage motivation gap. Guests push back with general disagreement but limited counterarguments.

Bowing to your partner discussion

React to video of woman bowing to partner. Would guests bow for a boyfriend? Madison: yes. Payton: yes if good provider. Others: no. Brian contrasts willingness to have sex with strangers but not perform traditional acts of submission.

Twitter drama: Jake Shields

Jake Shields (MMA fighter) tweeted that Whatever podcast is designed to divide sexes and make women look dumb. Claimed Daily Wire is trying to buy the show. Brian reads his full response tweet pointing out Jake appeared on same format shows, denies Daily Wire acquisition talks. Also mentions Cernovich drama. Old drama (scammer update) deferred to another episode.

Transcript

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Brian Atlaswelcome to the whatever dating Talk podcast where we try to make sense of the modern dating hellscape I'm your host Brian Atlas thank you for tuning in tonight you could been anywhere in the world but you're here with me I appreciate that we're coming to you live from Santa Barbara California every

Brian AtlasSunday and Tuesday at 5:00 P p.m. Pacific a few quick announcements this podcast is viewer supported Havey YouTube demonetization so please consider donating through streamlabs instead of super chatting as YouTube

Brian Atlastakes a brutal 30% % cut so if you Super Chat 100 YouTube takes 30 if you donate 100 streamlabs only takes three streamlabs.com whatever link is in the description we do prioritize messages

Brian Atlasthat are made via streamlabs if you want to interact nearly instantly with us and Weighing on the conversation consider sending a TTS text to speech message for the first 30 minutes or so of the show TTS will be

Brian Atlas$69 $200 and up triggers TTS thereafter TTS is via streamlabs only if your chatter or TTS is too toxic we reserve the to skip it please see the description for all other triggers and full details uh we have Channel

Brian Atlasmemberships to become a member hit the join button tier one is just $5 a month we're also live on Twitch right now pull up another tab go to twitch.tv/ whatever drops a follow in the prime sub if you have one if you have Amazon Prime you

Brian Atlascan link it to your Twitch it's a quick very easy way to support the show every single month we got merch shop. whatever.com I'm wearing our whatever hoodie uh if you like it get yourself one follow us on Instagram at whatever

Brian Atlasever any girls who want to be on the show DM whatever on Instagram if you can make it to Santa Barbara follow me on Instagram BD adlas check out my nonprofit movement big ladyy matter BLM

Brian Atlasfor short let's see what else uh Discord we have a private patreon members only Discord discord.gg whatever patreon.com whatever we have a Clips Channel if you can't

Brian Atlascatch the full shows we have Clips channels link for that's in the description also we have a Tik Tok uh Tik tok.com whatever

Brian Atlaspod and uh we're trying to get to one million followers on Tik Tok we're about 50k away so if you can drop us a follow on Tik Tok would be much

Brian Atlasappreciated are you it's cop drop okay all right disclaimer the views ex uh oh apologies that we're running a little bit late here we had a uh P we had two

Brian Atlastwo Nosh shows um and then we had a where Kiki was sitting we had a uh last minute I don't even know how to

SPEAKER_00call it abandonment what do you call it a nervous freakout uh a panel

SPEAKER_00abandonment um One Motorsports donated $69 evening B I sent you a sweet clip in

Brian AtlasDiscord check it out to the guests May Fortune shine upon you yeah oh mind you the one of the no shows who

Brian Atlasclaimed she went to the ER uh actually it's not worth going I just don't believe whenever people say that they're in the emergency room I

Brian Atlasdon't think they're in the emergency room but anyways uh or their car broke down don't believe any of it they're all liars but uh with that said without further Ado we're going to have the guests introduce themselves so please

Avatell us your name age location occupation go ahead hi I'm Ava and I'm 23 and I live in Seattle occupation occupation I am

Rileycurrently trying to become an apprentice electrician all right and I also have a YouTube channel what about you hi I'm Riley I have a cough drop in my mouth so

Rileyignore that and I'm 19 occupation Santa Barbara oh location Santa Barbara occupation I work at a restaurant hi my hold on

Brian Atlasare you from Santa Barbara not originally but I live here right now okay and uh you go to school yeah what are you studying business okay are you

Lexiein school uh I did two years of Community College what did you study computer science hi my name is Lexie I'm 23 years

Brian Atlasold I do only fans and I'm from Arizona 23 you said yes okay what else do you do

Brian Atlasum are you not involved in that kind of work anymore or don't you work at one of the ranches no not anymore oh you quit okay yeah are you still doing like a

Brian Atlasside hustle with that or um yes oh okay is it it's a solo Venture though yes so like escorting yes okay got what about

Fernyou my name is Fern I'm not originally from Santa Barbara I'm from son County MH I'm a buser and I'm 19 years old student also yeah at the CC what are you

Paytonstudying uh law and Society all right welcome Kiki no I'm just kidding um I'm pay IRL or Payton I'm 27 from Massachusetts I work with farmers and

Brian AtlasI'm also a streamer uh he only speak he doesn't speak English he only speaks ger

Brian Atlasby the way this is a World War One helmet and a Chilean military uniform so if any of you have any funny ideas any

Brian Atlasof you edge edgy people it's a Chilean from Chile the Latin American country and a World War I helmet not World War

MadisonII relax okay Maddie what about you my name is Madison I'm 19 years old I'm a student at s City College and I also work for the whatever po I'm all right welcome everybody so we're

Brian Atlasgoing to go around the table once more what is everybody's current relationship status so are you single talking stage situationship Friends with Benefits relationship married

SPEAKER_00polyle Giovani Jade donated $69 chick in between bismar and the dollar is sleeper fine is that the same

SPEAKER_00chick from the last podcast she was dope dump your BF I'm simping she doesn't have a boyfriend have a boyfriend all right Giovani uh she is

Brian Atlasshe is well we'll get into that in just a moment so current relationship status um if you're single how long have you been single what's your longest

Avarelationship um I'm single I've been single for a couple months now uh my longest relationship was a little less than a

Brian Atlasyear all right uh the one that was a little less than a year was that the one that ended 3 months ago yeah yes okay are you lit

RileyLexi always okay I just smoke some HED all right that's what I smelled uh what what about you I'm single I've been single my

Rileywhole life I've never officially dated anybody so single for 19 years all right um what's the longest period of time you've dated somebody I've never dated

Brian Atlasanybody well so I guess what's the longest period of time you've have you been on a date yes okay have you uh

Brian Atlaswhat's your orientation straight by bisexual uh bisexual okay have you um what's the longest period of time

Brian Atlasyou've been talking seeing anybody probably like seven months okay

Rileyuh man or woman um one woman one man at the same time no different time one woman like 7 months and then one man like 6 months 7 months okay but neither

SPEAKER_00of these whatever donated $200 Lexi if you left Bunny Ranch how does one book you for private is courting going

Lexieforward I have an email address that's linked in my email you bro you had a you had like your friends no I didn't um

LexieLexi with two ex's love lace VIP gmail.com hit it I'm subscribe to my only fans because it's currently on sale

Brian Atlasfor $5 okay Lexi all right [ __ ] Shameless plug all right um so you dated a woman for well not dated you saw a

Brian Atlaswoman for 7even months saw a guy for six months um what was the nature of those would you you consider them situationships yeah okay I guess that's

Brian Atlaswhat I'd call it yeah how so let's start with the uh the guy first the guy you saw for 6 months how often would you hang out with him um probably like three four times a week and pretty

Brian Atlasconsistently like that for the whole six months yeah okay and then the girl how often would you see her that was not often the girl was so long ago that was like like so long ago it was like barely

Rileya real relationship so I would say the most official is the guy six months six months and uh you're not seeing either

Brian Atlasof them currently though no I am you are yeah the guy or the girl the guy you're seeing the oh so okay you're seeing the guy

Brian Atlascurrently um is it long distance or you guys both live here no we both live here okay and you see each other three to four times a week but you've been single your whole

Brian Atlaslife but you've been you hang out with this guy three to four times a week for 6 months I mean are you guys exclusive not that I know of have you had any

Rileyconversations about exclusivity at all no but I probably should you should do you want exclusivity um probably yeah probably I think I make it kind of clear

Rileyon jokes that I'll make and stuff but what do you mean like I don't know something like if you [ __ ] her I'll burn your

Brian Atlashouse down like something like that [Music] okay which is a joke it is a joke wait

Brian Atlasbut you said if you [ __ ] her so is he like telling you about chicks he's pursuing or like no no whoa or like her the way you said it like her

Rileysounds very specific like no no one's specific like I'll just say that like in a joking way oh okay uh but so are you seeing other people then um not right

Rileynow are you on on any dating apps not anymore I was like on one I've been on I was on Tinder for a while but I just deleted it like a week ago you deleted it a week ago yeah well it's not very

Brian Atlasexclusive then if yeah I mean exactly I'm not saying it was exclusive well have you been have you um for the six months and it's when you say six months some people will say like on and off so

Brian Atlas6 months total but I've known them for 2 years but it's been 6 months whatever um um it's been 6 months consecutive right no there was like a two Monon Gap in the

Brian Atlas6 months or are we talking eight months total no months six months there's like a two Monon Gap in the middle yeah I see okay all right and

Brian Atlasso in this total six-month period of time excluding the two-month Gap were you seen or have you seen other people um in the two Gap yeah loose [ __ ]

SPEAKER_00Energy donated $69 Brian on the last pod Pearl said you paid her to be on the Pod Say It Ain't

SPEAKER_00So if that's true that's sad and total El simp [ __ ] Bro Maddy smacked at dumpy right quick # get the Rocks #f freck

Brian Atlasnumber8 at 18 what does he mean all right thank you uh thank You LP appreciate it man um they're talking

Brian Atlasabout Brian's dumpy so lost I know you got a dumpy Brian apparently how does he know that I don't know maybe there's a clip of me like

Brian Atlasstanding up whoa it's so weird like all the girls look at it too when I get up they just start staring how do you see that you see when girls are tricking out your no but like there's like two three or four ttss that come through night

SPEAKER_03mentioning it well now I'm definitely going to be staring every time you get up every time get I'm going try to look what's that I'm trying every time you get up I'm trying to take a peek next time you get up just know I'm

Brian Atlasgoing to be watching ask girls are going to thank you for sexually objectifying me Alexi I always appreciate it um so uh can I ask

Brian Atlasher a question is it related yes who Lexi or no her okay go ahead have you ever had

Paytoncarnal knowledge I do not know what that is have you ever had sex with

Brian Atlasanyone in general yes yes okay so yeah going back to this um

Brian Atlasthe the two-month break you were like seeing other other people yeah okay um now has he ever discussed like wanting exclusivity or no no okay so he's kind

Brian Atlasof happy keeping things more casual probably and it sounds like you are kind of okay with it too right mostly yeah or do you want do you want boyfriend girlfriend what do you want I don't know what I want you don't know what you want

Brian Atlasit's been six months it's like 6 months you got to make a decision right um do I though well you don't no you don't have to do you are you worried if you were to

Brian Atlasgo to him and be like hey I want monogamy I want exclusivity I want more I want boyfriend girlfriend are you worried he would say no um not necessarily worried but I

Rileythink that that's definitely a possibility mhm but if that were to happen then I would just leave you know I wouldn't it's not much of like a worry at this point it's more

Rileylike a if that happens then I'll go find someone else who can give that if that's what I want okay I see uh and then there was the girl that

Brian Atlasyou were also seeing um but that sounded like it was a bit less regular in terms of how was like a while ago like when I was like 14

Brian Atlasso oh okay that's not counting um and then have you ever had a roster a roster yeah like maybe talking to a couple yeah H is that what you said I

Rileyguess yeah hey yeah have you ever had like hoes like a main ho side ho that kind of thing um well in like what way like people that I'm like seeing in real life or just like people on

RileySnapchat both I guess like I guess but not like a big roster maybe like two two okay um I'm just I don't know if you're

Brian Atlassingle though cuz when I originally asked you you said you've been single your whole life but you've been seeing a guy for 6 months you hang out three to four times a week that's pretty

Brian Atlasconsistent um that's how it is today though like well I know that that's the kind of arrangements but I don't know if I would categorize you as single right

Brian Atlaswhy not well I I feel like uh single would seem to suggest it doesn't necessarily mean that

Brian Atlasyou're in a like here let me ask you a question if some if there were people who were dating for just two weeks but they put a title on it boyfriend

Brian Atlasgirlfriend are they single no right they're in a relationship yeah but here you are you've had this ongoing for 6 months you hang out with the guy

Brian Atlasthree to four times a week if a guy were to come along and say I would like to hang out with you take take you out on a date on a day you plan to hang out with

Rileyanother man you would say no right um not necessarily I would say yes if I would prefer to hang out with that other guy like if I'm hanging out with

Rileythis guy and not doing anything and the other guy is asking me to dinner at a steakhouse or something I think I'd rather go to the steakhouse and get free

Brian Atlasmeal so if this uh Chilean Soldier here ask you out on a date you would

Brian Atlassay would you to to nice Habachi Benny Benny Hana steak dinner Habachi dinner would you would you say yes well

Rileyin this exact scenario in this exact scenario why not this person sitting right here uhoh is that who you're referring to is

Brian Atlasthat who you're referring to he's 6'3 he is 6'3 how tall are you 5'10

Riley1ent are over here um would you do it no okay not my type personally is it cuz

Rileyhe's white said okay but what if I were to take you out on a date right now if you were to take me out on a date between the two I would go on a date

Rileywith Lexi for sure so there's that damn brutal mogged no offense no offense it was valid is that

Brian Atlasguy you're seeing sing other people also um I've never asked I don't know honestly you just he's [ __ ] other girls but I feel like would that bother you if he if he was sleeping with other

Brian Atlaswomen probably yeah so if it would bother you why not the why don't you push for exclusivity or a title um because that's a question that you have

Rileyto ask and that's a conversation that you have to have and that's not a conversation I really want to have cuz that's like very you prefer how casual it is I don't prefer hang out can I say

Lexiesomething real quick I feel like if he wanted to he would and as her being a woman it's not really her job to like be like if they've been talking for

Lexie6 months and he wanted to have her as a girlfriend he would have initiated that he would have exactly you know what I mean like he would have been persistent

Rileystill give him the time because I'm having fun I'm having a fine time it doesn't bother me that much that we're not dating and if you wanted a date then he could make that move but again yeah

Rileylike but that's why she's keeping her the girl like I'm not going to be you don't feel like it's depleting your options by sticking with him even though he doesn't want to be with you in a relationship but she just said that she

Paytonwould go out to dinner with me if I offered but I'm saying she also said that if he did want to she would be in a relationship with him so why keep playing you know around with him and and

Rileyhanging out with him if he doesn't want to be serious with you when you could find someone that does want to be serious with you because I'm not dying to be in a relationship that bad and I don't need to be in a relationship so if it doesn't work out then I won't be in a

Rileyrelationship I don't have somebody else I'm trying to date anyway so if I'm single I as I said I was single for 19 years I don't care if I have a boyfriend or not or a girlfriend or whatever so if

Paytonyou doesn't want to then it's not really affecting my life that badly if it was up to you though would and and you could somehow convince him to ask you and have this conversation with you and want to

Paytonbe with you seriously would you want that well I wouldn't want to have to convince him so not necessarily with the magic of you had magic right like you

Paytonhad magic and you could just make his mind say that he wants to be with you in a serious relationship would you choose that rather than how you're with him now probably I think anybody would

Rileyprefer to be in a relationship and not have to worry about other girls or whatever but that's just not the way it is and I'm not going to act like it is you know like that's that magic isn't

Lexiereal life so you seem like a very independent person and like in today's society a lot of us are codependent on a lot of people so that's what I'm getting

Rileyfrom you is that you're like kind of going with the exactly she just likes to have fun yeah and it's like it's not like I'm like hoing around and [ __ ] a bunch of other people and the reason I'm

Rileyin this situation is because like I want to be a hoe it's just like if he's not asking then I'm not going to beg and that's it you know like it'll go like how it goes until it ends and that's it

Brian Atlasso to Lexi's Point here Lexi you said well if he wanted to he would it's the guy's responsibility for ask T ask for for the relationship actually I think it's the

Lexiewoman's responsibility to ask for the relationship I feel like it should be like 50/50 Meet Me Halfway I'm not saying that like it's up to Ronald amaka donated

SPEAKER_00$100 subscribe to at the urban landlord and S so to AA fire fire fire you look great if they get out of pocket go #

SPEAKER_00Melly devilish face olive skin light brown skin what what oh it was the the Emojis that okay uh Ronald thank you for

Lexiethe TTS ronal what were you saying Lexi um I was saying that it was like meeting me halfway you know what I mean like for

Lexieexample with me if I like somebody I'm pretty consistent and persistent with making sure that they know like hey I'm interested in you you know what I mean so if I'm doing all those things and

Lexiethey're not reciprocating then at that point I don't feel like in her situation it would be worth to like continuously try to initiate a

Brian Atlasrelationship does that make sense that makes sense however I we'll get relationship status from everybody and then we'll dive right back into that so relationship status single longest

Brian Atlasrelationship 4 years how long youve been single for uh 3 years all right what about you I'm single all right right how long

Fernyou been single uh almost a year longest relationship one that's like on and off probably like 4 years and then like a consistent one was probably like almost

Ferna year the one that ended one year ago was which one the 4year one no the one-year one yeah that one's just a separate one it it's just another guy

Fernokay and the fouryear on and off how many times was it on and off I couldn't even tell you every other week like would end for like a day and we'll be back and then it'll be like 2 months and

Brian Atlaswe'll be back it so like more than 10 more than 20 more than oh more than like 100 probably W my more than 100 and

Brian Atlasso that's a lot of times of of all those times how me uh how more often than not was it you ending things or who what by

Brian Atlasthe way orientation by okay um was it a man or a woman man who would end it you or him it was like 5050 but I would say mostly him

Fernit would just be him like raging and then ending it wait 50/50 but mostly him yeah I would say like 50/50 cuz I would do it sometimes but it was also like almost two years ago when it officially

Brian Atlasended it's like I really don't remember okay uh and then who would kind of be the one to reach back out to 50/50 or I would say mostly him so he would sounds

Brian Atlaslike he would mostly end it but then also so mostly come back okay yeah he was a what was the if there was a 100 is a lot but what was the

Fernprimary recurring reason for the frequent breakups it would be just like Petty arguments like I don't know he I he would say something that would piss me off I would say something that would piss him off and be like what's the point of him being together we would

Brian Atlasjust break up and then you guys would be back together like 3 days later not even probably days okay and and uh so what would be was there one primary thing

Fernthat was the source of the arguments like cheating or was it just Petty like annoying type stuff or I would find him like doing like really

Fernjust like weird things sometimes um Weir like what he would like Snap girls and then this one time when we like first started dating he texted a girl that he missed her and he would FaceTime her

Fernlike that night or something because we just scrolling on his Instagram and but yeah that I he did [ __ ] one of my best

Lexiefriends though while you were off or on um we were off and then we got back together is she still your best friend oh he oh he whoa twist so he [ __ ] her

Fernbest friend but her best friend's a guy a dude so he was on the DL he's by too then what on the DL though that's a thing did you know he was by I don't want to like expose him but like I don't

Ferncare this is TE this is um he was probably like questioning um but I never really minded it cuz like why would I care you know it's okay if you want to question but it probably happened like my junior year I

Ferndidn't know and then I got back together with him my senior year of high school and then broke up with him cuz I was like okay this is this I didn't break up with him because of that cuz I didn't

Fernknow yet so by that time I like broke up with him the very last time um somebody told me that and I was like what so I was probably like a secret for a couple

Fernof months yeah did did you break up again over that no I just found out by the grace of God that somebody told me after the last time we broke up and we

Brian Atlasnever go back together wait

Fernso you said he he he [ __ ] like he F he he did the [ __ ] he got [ __ ] God knows but know you didn't ask for details I mean like it

Fernwas kind of he won't admit it that it happened but some like he told a few people but to me he'll tell me like no it didn't happen but it did did you ask

Fernyour best friend if it happened yeah and he said it it did are you still friends with that best friend um I wasn't friends with him for about a year but I'm probably as close as ever

Fernwith him now oh man you're very forgiving I am but at the same time it's just like me and the other guy my exboyfriend friend like honestly it was fair game it was

Brian Atlas[ __ ] up that he did it but me and him were broken up so like what can I do about it now they break was there any infidelity on your side any cheating no

Paytonokay all right what about you uh my longest Rel relationship was 7 years I've been single for 7 years and I've

Brian Atlasbeen celibate for 4 years all right cool and so going back to you um are you currently is there currently anybody in the

Brian Atlas[Music] picture kind of guy or girl guy just and is it just one guy or there are other guys in the picture there's just one guy no roster no ever had a roster yeah like

FernI would snap people but I like wouldn't go on dates with like multiple men honestly to much how long have you been seeing this current guy kind of 8 months but you're single yeah uh

Fernhow often do you see this guy um it used to be like probably like three times a week but now it's it has it's been like 3 weeks since we hung out are things good though

Fernor I mean like we text and like he wished me happy birthday and stuff maybe you've been busy he's been busy I don't know school started I don't know but I

Fernwould say it's going fine okay and you want more or are you happy being nothing I guess I mean

Fernno um we have had conversations and he's told me he doesn't want anything and I'm honestly like fine with that now I've like processed everything went through

Fernall the emotions yeah I was sad cuz I did want something real with him but um he's just not someone I should date so in my is your best friend no barely even

Brian Atlasfriends um but yeah I'm fine honestly now so for you two since you are single but you've been seeing a guy for six months you've been seeing this guy for eight

Brian Atlasmonths you recently haven't been hanging out with him too much but you were hanging out with him there was a really big gap in between that how big three

Brian Atlasfour months oh okay um well in any case you were hanging out with him very fairly frequently three times a week

Brian Atlasyeah and question if these guys were not in the picture do you think that you would be pursuing other

Rileymen not necessarily like if if a guy comes along then yeah but like as I said I deleted Tinder and I'm not like I'm not like

Rileyfeing for a guy in my life cuz for after a year in Santa Barbara and talking to different guys it's been [ __ ] every single one so I'm like I was single

Rileymy whole life and I'm fine doing it until it's the right one so I'm not like on my hands and knees looking for a man to date me what so what's the um question for both of you what is the

Brian Atlasnature of your time spent with these guys so like you said you see this guy three to four times a week not your boyfriend you're single you see him three to four

Brian Atlastimes a week is it like would you consider a booty call sometimes yeah yeah so is it like like je you see him during the day or is it like come over at night let's

Rileyhook up and then that's it it's at night at night yeah at night mostly at night there's times where it's not and there's times where it's not just sex and it'll

Rileybe something else or it won't even be sex at all but then sometimes it will be or at least feeling like straight up a booty call so a little bit of

Brian Atlasboth okay how and when you do hang out what's like the average length of the hangout like 1 Hour 2 hours 3 hours I

Rileywould probably say like an hour for me one hour yeah um I would say like night to sometime in the morning

SPEAKER_00like oh yeah there's like afternoon sleepovers killer of cereal donated $69 how do we all navigate this rise of risk of undisclosed SD in the modern

SPEAKER_00dating realm condoms merely for pregnancy preven but STD can still be caught with condom use how do you approach

Lexieit the rise of risk of undisclosed modern dating realm merely yeah I mean it's to get tested in between every

Lexiepartner and to also perform DCS which is called a dick check um you just want to you know do a quick little general look

Lexiewould you do that even like well yeah honestly like even as a yeah like with any guys like on Tinder you met a guy on Tinder how how do you go

Lexieabout asking well first of all I would ask for a testing if okay condoms you know what I mean but also a dict check is you just want to make sure I'm trying to explain to you you're interrupting me

LexieBrian you're just like looking in the general area just to make sure that there's no like cuts open wounds anything that looks abnormal you know what I mean do you tell him like do you

Brian Atlasput on some gloves all right all right uh bend over like what do you do um how do you go about that just use my hands to just like look but like do you say time for the dick check or is it more

Paytonlike it's like more so like I know what I'm looking for and I'm just like looking has any of the men ever been like like I I'm sorry but if we're going to be intimate I speak before you

Paytoninterrupt though just want to ask a question um has any of the guys that you met just randomly or on Tinder or naturally have they ever been like why like usually I feel like naturally if

Paytonyou're like going to hook up with someone you're making out you're getting into it it I just feel like it would be an Abrupt and kind of you know odd thing to say oh I'm going to do a dick check

Lexieor or start to do that one thing about me is that if I'm being sexual with anybody that I always ask for testing even if we're using a condom I still want to see the tests you know what I

Lexiemean so if I'm going to be sexual with somebody I obviously can have enough Comfort to say hey I want to see this are you tested you know what I mean so I don't think it'd be that awkward would you be

Lexieoffended if guy was like wants to do a [ __ ] check [ __ ] no I could do a you want to do a [ __ ] check on me with both my legs behind my

Lexiehead chill out yeah but yeah like um I mean if we're going to have sex with each other I'm

SPEAKER_00going to want to see J donated $69 how are STDs spreading so much this chick is giving dudes Hogs an ocular

Lexiepack down and thinks it does something we're doomed boys did you guys not here you guys have to get tested between every partner and use condoms that's a

Lexiebig one or just don't engage inage in having sex people that you don't trust maybe as long as you're being [ __ ] check to be honest do you know how many

Brian Atlasguys do I do the [ __ ] check is it to see what size labia they it's to the big laia matter yeah do you know how okay

Brian Atlaswait bisexual women wait are are you by too yeah I'm bisexual bye bye bye bye bye

Lexiebye uh can anybody Brian I have a story I recently went on some dates Li and the amount of guys that

Lexiewant to eat CH without seeing women testing is like crazy because I carry dental dams and dental dams are latex

Lexiethat's [ __ ] disgusting yes like did did do men even know that you can get oral STDs like from eating vagina because a lot of guys will just try to eat my vagina and I'm like whoa like no

Lexieyou know what I mean like you can't do that are these like just like regular don't eat my [ __ ] like guys that I've had on regular dates they've literally on the like and I'm like who and then

Brian Atlasyou tell them wa you wait wait I just got hold hold on Lexi hold on wait wait Lexi so just to be clear let me just recap here so you'll you'll be on a date with a guy and instead of him being like

Brian AtlasI don't know where that's been you'll be like you don't know where that stop I'll be like why would you want to e AA you know who coping and seething right now

SPEAKER_00AA stops Rising you looking hot girl shout out to John all right uh thank you for the TTS man appreciate it and I carry dental dams so

Lexiea lot of guys don't know what dental dams are and when I pull it out they're completely mortified it's like a thin sheet of latex that goes right over your [ __ ] and then you can engage in safe

Brian Atlasoral sex so if you don't have a dental dam go to the go to the adult store and get you some dental dam for safe sex Beau that's a great tip Lexi I have an

Ferneven better one uh no terrible advice why would you not do that cuz reasons no head for you wait you I want to say that you can also get

Fernlike an STD if someone has like a cold sore or something so it can like also be transferred that way so so dental dam true you have to be really careful and if you're using a dental dam you can't even be scared to eat [ __ ] cuz there's

Lexiea barrier between it so why are you scared to eat py Bri don't eat P Brian would you never do it even if you were in a relationship like would you do I haven't gone down on a girl since the

Brian Atlasbush just know I feel so bad for your girlfriend Brian you have a girlfriend you don't go down are you single I don't talk about my relationship but uh yes I've had

Brian Atlasmultiple long-term relationships and it's not been an issue girl first off has any of your girlfriends ever cheated on you not to

Brian Atlasmy knowledge it's possible but not possible I mean you do realize you can make a girl come without eating her [ __ ] right but a lot of girls love oral

Brian Atlassex okay cool okay I'm just saying do you know what the sexual boundary is yes ah see now when I throw this term in your face you guys tend to get very quiet so let's talk about sexual

Brian Atlasboundaries and consent so if I don't want to do something sexually I'm allowed to do that and I women have plenty of sexual boundaries and if we were to have flip the flip the roles

Brian Atlashere and we were to try to press you're a woman what you don't suck dick what the [ __ ] I bet all the dudes cheat on you I bet blah blah blah I bet all this oh you don't want to have anal sex as a

Paytonwoman what's wrong with but they do that they do do that no yes they do I I it's not right either way whatever side it comes from it's totally that's totally a valid boundary to have people are allowed to have boundaries and if you

Avastart to disagree with that you can disagree with it but then going after someone for it I don't think is right yeah I'd say it's just it's more of an uncommon thing to hear that is a bound three so I have a question for you then

Rileyon that topic sure go ahead do you expect head do you prefer it or expect it like would you are you like are you like I don't date a girl that doesn't get like if you're about to hook up with a girl

Fernyou're like oh she's going to give me head or you just like or do you ask like hey would you give me head or do you just expect her to do it so there's a couple different questions here uh it's not a deal breaker if a girl doesn't

Brian Atlaswant to give head but it's actually not really been an issue in any of my relationships no I'm just saying they'll give it an

Rileyissue but that's double standard but you didn't the double standard I'm saying if in a world where you would expect head but not give it but if you're saying that you don't and you're like I don't care if she doesn't give head too like

Brian Atlaswe both don't give head then hell yeah well I mean so there's a couple things here if if it's her boundary that she doesn't like to give head that's one thing but if it becomes Tit for Tat you won't do it so I won't do it that's a

Brian Atlasdifferent Dynamic why it's fair yeah but that's more hold let's talk about the fairness of dating in just a moment um do women expect men to

Brian Atlaspay for first AIDS not always no do most women expect men to pay for first AIDS a lot of women do we even do we even let's say it's even 40% of women

Brian Atlasokay do you do okay fine we'll even remove the paying component women don't make the first move women don't initiate women don't go for the first kiss women don't move things forward sexually what I think

Brian Atlasthat's not true it's aund I'm speaking in generalities here it's 100% true in general I don't think so though how many

Brian Atlashow many guys have you approached like asking on a date yeah none how many guys have approached you none you've never have you ever been to

Brian Atlasa party yeah have guys ever approached you yeah but not asking me on a date or you're taking it a bit too literally what about the guy that you're with now okay how many parties do you think you've been to in your whole life too

Brian Atlasmany to count I don't know okay have you how many times do you think you've been HIIT on at a party probably like less than 10 how many times have you gone up to a guy and you actively hit on him none

Rileyokay but some girls do do that that's just me personally what if I just don't see any cute guys at that party like I know girls that'll go up to a guy do you ever get guys who slide into your DMs

Brian Atlasevery once in a while have you ever slid into a guy's DMS yeah okay more often than the amount of times guys have slid into your DMs probably not okay so and

SPEAKER_00then Bas I mean just using your own eyes when you are at at these parties graffito taged donated $69 sex with a condom is gay that's exactly

SPEAKER_00why STDs are spread you're basically having sex with the latex it's not pleasant and feels nothing this is I'd honestly rather not have sex at all if it's with a condom

Paytonexactly why you're over here spreading probably scds because wear a freaking condom please he go along with what you said earlier and he's gten checked and he's in a serious relationship with a

Paytonwoman and she's gotten checked and that's just how they both feel you were talking about the spread of STDs though no you just brought that up he was specifically talking about what he was just talking about okay of the talking

Lexieabout the topic that made us talk about the condoms and STDs and stuff so not your personal life I don't care also I just want to having sex with no

Brian Atlascondom in your personal life going back to the whole uh head thing so just to be clear like I actually care a lot about my partner's

Brian Atlaspleasure so I want her to come first and if she's capable she's going to come multiple times before I even come so what's

Brian Atlasactually unfair women can have multiple orgasms I can only come once I think that's unfair that is not true also your refractory period is just longer than

Lexieother people some men can come within [ __ ] 5 minutes y you just have a long refractory period yeah no that's definitely not true because I know guys that can come multiple times yeah I've know I've known people that have gone

Avalike 10 rounds and guy I feel like you're you're kind of the exception to the rule when it comes to hookups and coming first usually men get a lot more

Brian Atlasout you think wait just to be clear you guys think hold on you guys think that men can come maintain an erection and

Brian Atlascontinue having sex and come again and continue having sex and come again and you think that's the majority of men well yes no I just think you guys have

Lexieno idea about male anatomy whatsoever I don't know what they're teaching you anything I've met guys that have and then I met others that haven't been able

Brian Atlasto and I but I've definitely met guys that yeah but what percent what percent of men can maintain an erection after

Brian Atlasejaculation theere answer the question what percentage of men maintain an erection after ejaculation I'm just giving you based off my personal based

Fernoff my personal experiences that percentage off the top it's got to be less than 1% but I I mean I thought we were just saying how like I didn't think they would they would say a wck the whole time I was just saying

Brian Atlasthey could probably go rounds take like one minute then they can get out again yeah like do you know I all of us what a refractory period is I would say it's

Avanot 5 minutes for most men probably I mean we're also younger so maybe it's I was young once yeah well then you got a long refractory period and that's just

Rileyyou mhm there's some I know of stories of hookups of a guy that's gone 10 Rounds within probably two hours yeah so if you want to do that math whatever but

Brian Atlasthat's it really just everybody's different yeah okay so not every girl can squirt sure God I don't know that's true but when we're talking about like

Brian Atlasfairness double standards there's all kinds of double standards that exist y just don't like it when the double standards impact you wait what double standard are you referring to so she's

Brian Atlastalking about this double standard of guys receiving head but not giving head yeah okay okay I don't think there's anything wrong with that women have all kinds of

SPEAKER_00expectations on men's behavior without reciproc kill of cereal donated $69 what is the hottest thing you can ever see a man or woman do in the real world in society that would immediately

Brian Atlasturn you on to them 10 Rounds bro that's like a percentage of a percentage they go crazy some people I said he's spitting

Rileyon their back no and half the time and you're probably going to disagree with this because you're going to bring up some statistic but half the time girls don't

Ferncome once during at least half I think all the girls I know have faked it yeah guys don't Fake

Brian Atlasit Well I mean that's on the women that's wrong to fake an orgasm but uh I mean okay

Avacool not sure what the argument there is exactly crickets yeah I forgot so okay yeah Women fake orgasms okay that's not what we were saying I guess you're just

Rileythrowing it out there that um women are less likely to come in you br br up the double standard of women can come a million times but men only come once but

Rileywhat we're saying is most of the time women don't even come once or or half of a come because usually half of a come

Brian Atlasusually the guy is lasting 30 seconds and he comes and he goes to sleep so okay cool but so we were framing this in the context of my own personal anecdotal

Brian Atlasposition on this so when it comes to me I can't speak for how men operate in that realm my experience has been one my goal I'm going to make her come first if

Brian Atlaspossible multiple times I can do that without going down on her that's where the conversation originated and then from

SPEAKER_00there GMD gim donated $69 men stop creating these 304s save it for your future wife like a

SPEAKER_00real man stop acting like hormonal High School boys and then 304s will disappear forever problem solved hey he's a smart man yeah all right Jim thank you man

Brian Atlasappreciate it uh so okay we got a little bit sidetracked I'm trying to remember where we were going to I think I was asking you

Brian Atlasto um I think I asked what the no oh the so you're both single but you've

Brian Atlasboth been seeing these guys for six months 8 months um oh the like the nature of the Hangouts so it's like 1 Hour 2 hour Hangouts basically usually

Rileysleepovers honestly oh sleepovers what about for you yeah probably longer than 1 to two hours I I did have a question about this topic um have you ever contacted them to

SPEAKER_00have a Andrew's lighter donated $69 woman doesn't come during sex it's the guy's fault man doesn't come during sex there's something wrong with the

Paytonman I don't think anyone's saying there's something wrong with the man but is typically like biology that it's easier for menti dysfunction yeah um I was going to ask have you guys ever

Brian Atlascontacted no most men finish once anyone who's actually finished multiple times you know the pain of your blank almost falling off we were all 13 ones what the [ __ ] the marathon jerk session never

Brian Atlasends well okay that's an interesting one appreciate it man thank you thank you uh go ahead with your question have you ever contacted them for a booty call before probably like once yeah out well

Brian Atlasthat's not fair that's a bit of a double standard that the guy he always even though you've been seeing him for 6 months he's always the one that has to plan the date kind of seems like a double standard day she said booty call

Brian Atlas[ __ ] okay when I say date I mean that I don't mean like he takes you to a fancy seafood dinner the way I use date can refer to a hookup okay so she said booty

Rileycall so I thought she meant booty call as in you're calling him up to have sex and dip contacting to hang out yeah I'll ask to hang out it's never never just me

Paytonexpecting him to only ask I'll ask did that do you have a question or no I I understand what you were saying and I I did mean booty call in my

Paytonspecific question but I do understand what he means as in the man initiating to hang out in any type of the sense whether it's hooking up or just planning

Brian Atlaswhatever you do when you are seeing them uh okay so going back to your thing Lexi you said you got to meet halfway

Brian Atlasright when it came to like asking for commitment asking for relationship right right yeah so and I I made the point

Brian Atlasthat I actually think that that should be on the woman's side 100% yeah the woman should be the one seeking the

Brian Atlascommitment why because the burden is on men to do pretty much everything in the beginning and so and

Brian Atlasalso women seem a bit more more focused on the commitment than the men so if it's something that you want you should be the one asking for it like men get

Lexiescared of commitment so it tends to just like run them away he's not that into you then exactly why I was saying like if he wanted to you he would and if you're already meeting him that way and

Brian Atlashe's not that into you then it's I don't know but so here's the differential right so the W for the man is to get you to bed the W for the woman is to get the

Brian Atlasguy into a relationship and commitment because a girl can sleep with any dude really like if you maybe not every single guy but like if you wanted to you could [ __ ] most men grid One Motorsports

SPEAKER_00donated $691 women want to be more than sex to men but then turn around and sell themselves then get angry they are

SPEAKER_00treated like [ __ ] so strange maybe it is time for women to listen more and talk less word damn by the way I'm going

Brian Atlasto boost the uh TTS thank you grid one for for the TTS man appreciate it uh I'm going to boost the TTS we'll just do uh I might keep it for 30 then we'll boost

Brian Atlasit all the way up uh TTS will just be 100 uh so it'll be re 100 TTS 100 whatever

Avaum where was I so uh women initiating commitment usually sleep with whoever they want yeah so

Brian Atlasessentially like y'all can sleep pretty much with like if you want to sleep with a guy there's a good chance you can do it it's not clear to me if each of those men you'll be able to secure for longterm

Lexiecommitment so the W for you is getting commitment the W for the guy is just getting you into bed but why would I continue to try to get commitment from you if you don't

Lexiewant it so I'm not going to try going to go elsewhere if I wanted commitment I'm speaking hypothetically well if you keep trying before you ever sleep with them and you tell them that you want a

Paytonserious relationship with them and you're seeking that then that would be the W for you if you show them that that what you want before you sleep with them but I mean your argument was well

Brian Atlasit should be like kind of 50/50 or no no you didn't I don't even think you said meet halfway and it's the guy's duty to ask I said if I'm showing you

Lexieinterest then you're showing me Interest that's what I'm saying like us putting both in like both effort

Lexieputting effort into yeah like into the commitment of being in a relationship well yeah you should both but I'm not saying it's like his duty that's what

Brian Atlasyou said but it's also not re rewind the tape said it's a man's job I I don't know the exact framing but to the essence of you said it's the man should

Lexiebe the one asking take a man and like demasculate de how do you say the word emasculate demasculate demasculate him right so

Lexieit's like to a point I'm not going to be like do you want to be my boyfriend do you want to marry me like I don't think that I'm going to be the one asking you to marry me mhm you know what I mean but

PaytonI don't think that would be demasculate I think that would be actually showing how much effort you're putting in and TR I'm not proposing first we're talking about like the first talking stages though of like actually securing the

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