Brian GOES OFF! Man vs. Bear HEATED DEBATE?! She's Single BUT STILL Sees Her Ex?! | Dating Talk #157
Date: 2024-05-01
Duration: 7h 03m
Guests
Brian AtlasIdentified Speakers
SPEAKER_02Natalie(guest)
SPEAKER_03Jordan(guest)
SPEAKER_04Adeline Star(guest)
SPEAKER_05Ashley(guest)
SPEAKER_07Brian Atlas(host)
SPEAKER_09Q / Natalie(guest)
SPEAKER_11Jordan / Jade(guest)
SPEAKER_12Rahima(guest)
SPEAKER_14Lauren(guest)
Key Moments
00:00:20
QuoteBrian Atlas opens show with standard intro
“welcome to the whatever dating Talk podcast where we try to make sense of the modern dating hellscape”
00:03:28
OtherAdeline Star intro — kick streamer and OnlyFans model from LA
“hi I'm Adeline star I am 26 I live in LA originally from Texas I am a kick streamer and only fans model”
00:05:05
OtherLauren introduces herself as a courtesan at the Moonlight Bunny Ranch
“my name is Lauren I'm 31 years old and I am a cortisen at the moonlight bunny ranch and a student”
00:06:01
OtherQ / The Quill introduces herself — behavioral scientist and relationship coach from Raleigh NC
“I'm the Quill I'm 31 from Raleigh North Carolina I'm a behavioral scientist certified relationship coach and a YouTuber book author”
00:21:00
OtherAshley reveals she still sees her ex the morning of the show
“in person yesterday uh yeah yesterday this morning”
00:21:07
OtherAshley confirms ex was cheating during their relationship (not just the break)
“he was doing but was but hold on but was it was it open on his end no it was not open okay so he was cheating on you”
01:07:11
ControversyMan vs. Bear debate introduced — would you rather come across a bear or a man in the woods?
“you're alone in the woods would you rather come across a bear or a man you don't know”
01:07:33
OtherAdeline chose 'man' in man vs. bear debate
“know because he might have tools to help and if he's a terrible person then I'll take him out”
01:07:46
OtherRahima chose 'sunbear' (bear) in man vs. bear debate
“assume it's a sunbear and they are very cute so I'm going to choose the bear”
01:11:31
ControversyQ argues bear is statistically more dangerous than a random man in the woods
“the bear is absolutely has a larger probability of hurting you than a man does in the woods and it's that simple”
02:03:41
ControversyBrian rants about no-show guest who sent fake car crash photo — clear skies in Santa Barbara
“she sends us this photo oh my I got into a car crash... you notice the sky you see how overcast it is... it was clear skies all day”
02:05:43
ControversyBrian goes off about weekly guest lies — fake excuses instead of just cancelling
“oh my car broke down some I'm sick blah blah blah it's all lies they always lie they can't just say I'm a piece of I'm just not coming”
02:07:11
QuoteBrian quips that men start podcasts as therapy (vs. women going to actual therapy)
“yeah you know what male therapy is like women go to therapy Men start podcast yeah true”
02:36:18
ControversySelf-ratings round begins — Stiffler's question asks panel to rate looks 1-10
“ask everyone to rate their looks on a scale of 1 to 10 starting with you go ahead”
02:36:28
OtherRahima rates herself a 10
“10 10 I wasn't feeling my scarf but it's good”
02:36:44
OtherAshley rates herself a 7
“I I hate this question but yeah like a seven”
02:36:56
OtherBrian rates himself a 5 for looks
“I give myself a five”
02:39:37
OtherQ argues beauty standards are objective and cross-culturally consistent (Margot Robbie vs. Leslie Jones tweet)
“beauty is objective there's a consensus about what people will consider attractive and it's based on culturally”
02:41:50
OtherAdeline says she agrees everyone should consider themselves a 10 for self-confidence
“I agree because if you look good and you feel good that's what matters and then you're bringing that positivity into the world”
03:56:40
OtherBrian states he would not take a bullet for a girlfriend or wife
“I would not be willing in that scenario to take a bullet for her”
04:06:40
ControversyBrian argues the 'bloodline' framing — dying for a woman is worse for his dynasty than surviving
“would it be more masculine and more Alpha to secure your bloodline and go on and survive and have the other person take the bullet”
04:18:10
OtherQ challenges Brian: if cheating 'doesn't mean anything' to men, why should they care?
“the only reason men shouldn't cheat is because women will interpret it wrong”
04:36:03
ControversyForrest Gump analysis — Brian calls it a catastrophe for men: Jenny rejected Forrest, got AIDS, had a kid, came back when he was rich
“she rejects forced Gump he gets rich off of shrimp she gets AIDS and has a kid and then once he's Rich of course then she her even though she rejected him”
Topics Discussed
00:00:20
Intro and guest introductions
Brian opens with announcements. Guests introduce themselves: Adeline Star (kick streamer/OF), Rahima (social media manager), Jordan (gym co-owner, married), Jade Warrick (film producer, Wales), Lauren (Bunny Ranch courtesan), Ashley (real estate), Natalie (political content creator), Q/The Quill (behavioral scientist). Includes Welsh language demonstration from Jade.
00:12:40
Relationship status round
Each guest shares current relationship status and longest relationship. Ashley's situation stands out: single 1 year but saw her ex (chiropractor, 31) the morning of the show. Ex cheated during a mutual break; she still loves him; he wants to reconcile. Jordan is married (5 years). Jade met boyfriend when he was on a date with someone else. Lauren (Bunny Ranch) is single; longest relationship 3 years. Rahima broke up during COVID in Bali.
01:07:11
Man vs. Bear debate
Viral TikTok hypothetical: would you rather be alone in the woods with a man or a bear? Most panel chose 'bear' or deferred. Q and Jordan chose 'man'. Ashley, Lauren, and Rahima chose 'bear'. Brian argues women's preference for bear is social signaling about male distrust. Q counters that bears are statistically more dangerous. Title topic for the show.
01:36:00
Cheating discussion: male vs. female
Which is worse — male or female cheating? Panel and Q debate consequences vs. morality. Q argues female cheating is worse in terms of outcomes (women cheat emotionally, usually end the relationship; men cheat physically, relationship often survives). Lauren argues both are equally wrong. Q explains men's cheating motivation: greedy/novelty-seeking, not emotional dissatisfaction. Extended argument about why men shouldn't cheat if it doesn't mean anything.
01:58:23
Happy wife happy life / 40-50 year marriages
Q asks panel if they subscribe to 'happy wife happy life.' Panel mostly prefers 'balance' or 'happy spouse happy house.' Brian suggests the better phrasing. Q explains women experience more negative emotions in relationships and are more likely to end them, hence the focus on wife's happiness. Discussion extends to whether 40-50 year marriages are a thing of the past — panel says rare but possible; Brian cites feminism, dating apps, and entitlement as factors.
02:03:41
Brian rants about no-show guests
Brian reveals three guests no-showed for this episode. Shows a photo sent by one no-show claiming a car crash — but the photo shows overcast skies while it was a clear day in Santa Barbara. Brian 'goes off' about guests lying with fake excuses weekly (car crashes, family emergencies, traffic). The 'Brian GOES OFF' segment from the title.
02:11:40
What do you bring to a relationship + self-improvement flaws
Brian asks: what three things do you bring to a relationship? Each guest answers. Then: what's one thing you've done wrong in relationships and are working to improve? Highlights: Jade working on jealousy (boyfriend has poly background), Jordan working on not assuming during arguments, Rahima working on not trying to change partners, Ashley working on OCD/cleanliness triggers, Q wishes women understood male behavior differently.
02:23:20
Power couple discussion and Forrest Gump tangent
Brian reads Wikipedia definition of 'super couple / power couple.' Discussion includes what counts as a power couple. Brian goes on a Forrest Gump tangent: argues Jenny rejected Forrest, got AIDS, had a kid, then came back to Forrest after he got rich — 'a love story for women and an absolute catastrophe for men.'
02:36:18
Self-ratings round (looks)
Brian asks everyone to rate their looks 1-10. Self-ratings: Rahima 10, Adeline 10, Jordan ~9, Lauren ~8.5, Jade ~7, Ashley 7, Q 6 (Brian pushed her up: 'you're more than a 6'), Natalie (not clearly captured), Brian 5. Extended discussion on whether rating yourself a 10 is delusional vs. empowering. Q argues beauty is objective and cross-culturally consistent.
02:36:36
Bumble swipe study
Brian pulls up Bumble and gives each guest 10 swipes on male profiles to observe selectivity. Panel judges based on first photo only. Discussion of what makes men swipeable, consistency of female standards across cultures, Francisco Lachowski (male model) vs. Luis Guzman comparison as masculine vs. conventionally attractive example.
03:05:00
Attraction peak age / when do women peak in looks
Q asks at what age women peak in attractiveness. Answers: Adeline and Jordan say 25-35; Jade says 25 based on genetics; Lauren and Q say around 35; Ashley says mid-to-late 20s; Brian agrees. Brian asks if each guest would fast-forward their looks 10 years with no health impact — Rahima says yes.
03:53:20
Should a man take a bullet for a woman?
Brian states he would not take a bullet for a girlfriend or wife. Panel debates chivalry, nobility, the bloodline argument (Brian), and sacrifice as the ultimate act of love. Discussion includes trolley problem variant, Genghis Khan dynastic framing, pro-choice vs. pro-life tangent, and whether women's expectation of sacrifice is hypocritical given their own choices. Brian rants about the argument being his 'magic bullet' topic that generates debate with anyone.
Transcript
Page 1 of 8
00:00:20
Brian Atlaswelcome to the whatever dating Talk podcast where we try to make sense of the modern dating hellscape thanks for tuning in tonight you could have been anywhere in the world but you're here with me I appreciate appreciate that we're coming to you live from Santa Barbara California every Sunday and
00:00:33
Brian AtlasTuesday at 5:00 P p.m. Pacific I'm your host Brian Atlas few quick announcements this podcast is viewer supported guys we have liberals trying to cancel me conservatives trying to cancel me Karens
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00:03:06
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00:03:18
Brian Atlaschannel oh my God that computer came out of nowhere okay with that said without further Ado we're going to have the guests introduce themselves so please tell us your name age location and
00:03:28
Adeline Staroccupation go ahead hi I'm Adeline star I am 26 I live in LA originally from Texas I am a kick
00:03:38
Brian Atlasstreamer and only fans model sorry I got there there's a bug do you see anything weird going on in chat
00:03:48
Brian AtlasNick any reports of lag or anything I have a warning on my screen saying there's something wrong with the bit rate is it scuffed I don't see I think it's I think
00:03:59
Brian Atlasit's fine chat just keep us surprised if if uh there's any lag or FPS drops or anything like that uh what's your sorry what's your age again 26 26 all right
00:04:10
Rahimawhat about you uh hi my name is rahima I'm 28 years old I live in Los Angeles and I am a social media manager all right welcome hi I'm Jordan I'm
00:04:22
Jordan / Jade25 I live in Riverside and me and my husband own a gym in Riverside okay welcome hi I'm Jade War I'm 26 I'm from the UK I live in Seattle
00:04:33
Jordan / Jadeand I'm a film producer what part of the UK are you from originally Wales okay do you speak Welsh is it I grew up speaking Welsh can we hear a little demonstration my favorite sentence it doesn't really
00:04:45
Jordan / JadeMak sense but it's um my Babin yessi a Ply Pala a pascin wibbly wobbly and a poty ping absolutely yep I agree I'll
00:04:54
Jordan / Jadetell means later wait so is there what is what is gayc is that it's like um is that a Welsh language it's a Celtic language that came from the Welsh
00:05:05
Laurenlanguage it's in Ireland and Scotland so you don't speak I don't speak gay okay got it Lauren what about you uh my
00:05:15
Laurenname is Lauren I'm 31 years old and I am a cortisen at the moonlight bunny ranch and a student okay and those for those who don't know when you say cortisen what what does that mean so I'm a legal
00:05:28
Laurenuh legal uh girlfriend at um or I would say yeah legal cortis and legal um escort at uh
00:05:40
Ashleythe moonlight bunny ranch and it's yeah 100% legal in Nevada you it's like a carnal knowledge yes caral knowledge okay yeah hi my name is Ashley I'm 25
00:05:52
Laurenyears old and I'm in real estate and I'm studying interior design all right welcome I'm Natalie I'm 32 years old I
00:06:01
Q / Natalielive in LA and I'm a content creator like politics gotcha I'm the qill I'm 31 from Raley North Carolina I'm a behavioral scientist certified
00:06:12
Brian Atlasrelationship coach and a YouTuber book author all right welcome everybody so we're going to go around the table once more what is everybody's current
00:06:22
Brian Atlasrelationship status so are you single talking stage situationship Friends with Benefits married polyu sex cult herum whatever it may be if you're single how
00:06:34
Brian Atlaslong have you been single and what's the longest relationship you've ever been in go ahead I am the audio is muted oh you're F no you're fine go ahead okay I'm in a relationship relation were you in a
00:06:45
Adeline Starrelationship last time I was okay how long have you been in that relationship um about five months now 6 months how did you guys meet we met through a
00:06:56
Brian Atlasmutual friend is he a is he in the industry he is in the industry as well yes he he slangs does he slang he does he slangs yes but only me now so only
00:07:09
Brian Atlasslangs you yes he used to slanging others yes now only slangs you correct okay all right and uh how you said it's been going for five
00:07:19
Rahimato six months yeah okay did you say longest relationship my longest is two years two years all right okay what about you I'm single my longest
00:07:30
Brian Atlasrelationship was 5 years and I've been single for like 4 years single for four years longest 5 years um was the one
00:07:40
Brian Atlasthat ended four years ago your five-year relationship it was why did he dump you um we were stuck in Bali and it was Co
00:07:51
Rahimaand we just were like let's not do this anymore so while you were stuck in Bali yeah there so you were did you break up with him and then you when you we had to live together for eight months and we're
00:08:02
Rahimalike yeah know so did you guys like did one of you come back to the states or no we both wanted to stay in Bali but we had like an apartment there and it was Co so so wait were you guys still
00:08:13
Brian Atlascohabitating while like through the breakup yeah cuz Co and then even while you were single you guys were still cohabitating yeah oh [ __ ] okay and
00:08:23
Brian Atlasyou're D for yeah it was great so how long were you cohabitating for you were split like a year we lived together split up but Co so I would not recommend
00:08:36
Brian Atlasit in a normal situation but you were living together prior to co right yeah so then but then it was so do you think
00:08:45
Brian AtlasCo precipitated the breakup probably the inevitable but you're already living together was it just like you were too much could together we couldn't go outside ah so you're stuck yeah we both
00:08:58
Rahimalike to go outside was it strict in Indonesia yeah you couldn't go out yeah couldn't surf couldn't do anything so oh you're a surfer he's a surfer he's Pro
00:09:08
Brian AtlasSurfer he's a surfer yeah wait is it Rizzle um tan junk he's a
00:09:16
Brian Atlassurfer wait you dated the mayor of Bali absolutely that's uh rizle I'm pretty sure I think if I recall Nick could you go go Rizzle tangang he's a
00:09:26
Brian Atlaspro Surfer from Indonesia oh my God quick no yeah yeah you brought up the surfing in info I know about the you know I surf so uh wait find find this
00:09:37
Brian Atlasguy I used to watch his surfing videos all the time wait did you find him rizle r i z- l tan Jung I think it's t n j u n
00:09:49
Brian Atlasg he's got a probably got a Wikipedia bro this guy's the mayor of Bali I love my find his Wikipedia find his Wikipedia
00:09:56
Brian Atlasshe she dated the mayor of Bali whatever exclusive here sure just go go I guess just go along with it at this point you have it Nick
00:10:08
Brian AtlasWikipedia oh my God he doesn't own oh just but usually there's like a Google profile just show the Google results a couple's inst together you got
00:10:18
Brian Atlasit see let's see the spelling on this let's see how Nick does with Indonesian all it was close it was close
00:10:26
Brian Atlasall caps too Rizzle bro what the how you going to put it rizle not that kind of R I meant yeah you didn't hear me say r i
00:10:35
Brian Atlasz a l i I actually had this name last name right uh rizle tanang first Indonesian oh my geez what is going on uh uh pull up his IG pull up his IG
00:10:47
Brian Atlasthere he is rizle so this is your ex-boyfriend look at this look at this Legend scroll down Nick damn bro look at those profile God damn
00:10:58
Brian Atlasbro b had like one of the top uh surf spots in the world so is this your this is your boyfriend that's my husband yeah your
00:11:07
Brian Atlashusband what a legend there he is with is that no that's not Kelly who what is the other one Kelly wait hold on go back up is that Kelly none of these were my
00:11:16
Brian Atlasex-boyfriend but what's that Madison fisher fisher who Fisher you know Surfers that's Fisher from Australia oh
00:11:26
Brian Atlasokay all right all right uh so you weren't dating RZ tangum I mean no okay I just wait um I don't know why I go on these I go on these tangents I waste three minutes okay all right what about
00:11:38
Brian Atlaswhat about you Jordan uh married and this is my longest relationship 5 years five years wait Raheem rahima right coming back to you for just a sec cuz I forgot I forgot
00:11:49
Brian Atlaswhat my followup was going to be so you were cohabitating you said for like eight months n months yeah yeah so were you guys dating other people during this time period while you're still cohabit ating after the breakup yeah so you
00:12:02
Brian Atlaswould bring like you'd bring back some like hot Indo dude he'd bring back some like CHS bring back Rizzle yeah you brought back Rizzle yeah for shizzel
00:12:11
Brian AtlasRizzle for shizzel yeah okay so but you actually like you were dating while still cohabitating with your ex is that correct
00:12:22
Rahimayeah how big was this house like huge you get a huge house in B like nothing couldn't do it even if we was exes M he
00:12:32
Q / Nataliegot you got to stay outside heing your girlfriend yeah having sex yeah that's uh you got to move anyways uh okay so you were both
00:12:44
Rahimabringing people back to the house though I mean it wasn't like it wasn't yeah there were people coming in and going huh okay you would take Wednesdays I take Thursdays
00:12:59
Jordan / Jadeall right uh what about you hi um what was the question again oh current relationship status okay in a relationship it's the longest one so far and it's been three years three years
00:13:11
Jordan / Jadehow did you guys meet um I was working at a bar and he came in and he was on a date with someone else and was hit me what wait he was he was on a date with
00:13:22
Jordan / Jadesomeone else he was and then you were just there I was just working at the bar mate trying to give him drinks and and stuff he was hitting on me and I was like I don't do this thing but like if you're single come back and you know
00:13:35
Jordan / Jadeyou'll get my number and he came back the same time a week later and he was like I broke up with them I was like them that's plural and um yeah and then we've been together ever since I broke up with them so there were he was dating
00:13:48
Jordan / Jademultiple women he he broke up with them the second time like prior to the second time he saw you yes
00:13:59
Brian Atlasthank you is it um wait so just a couple clarifying questions yeah that was a was that the first date that he was on at that point no no they oh he was it dating that girl it was in Seattle and
00:14:12
Jordan / Jadeit was like that Polly situation where they're kind of just seeing a few people at a time and I'm like listen I don't do that but if you want to try the other thing hit me up what's the other thing
00:14:23
Brian Atlasthe monogamous one okay well at the time were you seeing anybody no not even nobody you worked at a bar mhm you had no prospects and you were involved in the night life
00:14:38
Brian Atlasyeah it happens I know okay so uh you he was on a so this girl he was in a engaged in a sexual
00:14:49
Brian Atlasrelationship with her indeed and in front of her he hit on you she was hitting on me too it was that Polly situation like I said you know the
00:14:59
Brian Atlas[ __ ] is going on in Seattle godamn okay flattered but no thank you okay so and he was out your chair straight on with the table
00:15:12
Brian Atlasyou sorry all right so you said he was involved with multiple people yeah I never met do you know how many he was no I I didn't want
00:15:24
Brian Atlasto know does it I mean do you have any concern for your monogamous relationship given this man's
00:15:35
Jordan / Jadeproclivity to be involved with multiple people at the same time um yes I'm very healthc conscious and so when we started seeing each other there was a long time before we were intimate and I made sure
00:15:47
Jordan / Jadethat we were both fully tested before anything happened that could lead to a transmission well I'm not even talking about VD I'm talking more so about potential infidelity because if he's
00:15:58
Brian Atlasinclin to want to be dating multiple people at the same time when you met him he hit on you in front of the girl he
00:16:05
Brian Atlaswas currently [ __ ] it occurs to me that unless he's had a total 180 in his conduct this guy's going to probably I
00:16:16
Jordan / Jadedon't want to throw this guy on the bus but you think he's going to be loyal to you I think so even now huh even right now like would you be in here on this
00:16:27
Brian Atlastrip yeah okay I think so well I guess they have been dating for three years but but it's like he hit on you I know I guess he was angling for a threesome but
00:16:37
Brian Atlaslike he hit on you in front of the girl yeah he was currently having sex with if he's that's pretty I mean I guess you're angling for threesome so yeah I mean I
00:16:49
Jordan / Jadedo believe that people can change and if he wanted to try the monogamy thing and he ended up preferring it um then that's good for him some people prefer being Polly and that's fine too
00:16:59
Laurentoo it's just not for me okay all right Lauren what about you uh so my longest relationship current relationship status
00:17:09
Brian Atlasno relationship right now so single single yeah all right and then longest relationship three years three
00:17:18
Brian Atlasyears all right and you are a corisan yes how many so those are kind
00:17:27
Laurenof temporary relationships I of a sexual nature so it's interesting yeah like I've known some clients for like 5 to seven years
00:17:39
Laurenand then my own relationships have only lasted like three and um I always find it's because I love to change and I love
00:17:47
Laurento just try new things and do new stuff and then if it's like the same I I don't mind it but I think then it if it starts depleting me then then I'm like all
00:17:59
Laurenright well I'll mention something and then if I mention something and then it doesn't work then that's how it goes okay
00:18:09
Laurenyeah could you ever see yourself dating one of your customers um you know I think that like there is that
00:18:19
Laurenfantasy there I think I'm someone that like I my problem is I only live in the moment and I never think about the future and that's like my biggest issue and so I'm like I don't
00:18:30
Laurenknow what's going to happen like in that next chapter I don't I don't know so maybe okay I know that sounds so weird but I I I just like to do a lot of stuff and
00:18:44
Laurenplan to do a lot of stuff but I don't know like what's going to happen and like but you get like any guys hitting on you at all um for for at the at the
00:18:52
Laurenranch no like for a relationship um I do and then um I do get guys hitting on me but then sometimes I wonder if it's it's
00:19:02
Laurenjust like like a fantasy thing um CU you know the Bunny Ranch and all that and so I'm like wondering if it's just that um
00:19:11
Laurenso I wonder you know is it for real for real um but uh I've yeah I've only had like
00:19:19
Brian Atlasintimate you know relationships I guess years ago so I guess we'll see what happens like there's are there no guys sliding into
00:19:31
Laurenyour DMs there are but sometimes when they slide in I'll you know I will I like that a guy has social media because it shows that like you know he has a image or something to protect even if it's not like he's got like a million
00:19:44
Laurenfollowers or something he he has something he shows up in the world as a way and um I feel like if someone's like no I I don't have anything I get kind of nervous I'm like oh what are you hiding
00:19:54
Laurenum but I have guys reaching out to me but sometimes um
00:20:01
LaurenI I think that might the old me would have loved to date them but I think that the new me would it it's a little tough yeah wait
00:20:13
Laurendo you uh you want to get married one day I mean if it happens that would be cool but like I won't like I never Bank on anything that like I can't control
00:20:23
Laurencuz that's just one way to like avoid unhappiness so I just like if it comes I'm like cool like I guess we're doing it and if it doesn't then I'm like well at least I didn't Bank on it and now I don't feel any shame for doing that so
00:20:36
Laurendo you want kids um that would be really fun I think I think that would be a I think that would be a good time I have some concerns about me having kids but I
00:20:45
Brian Atlasthink it would be fun okay what about you I'm single my longest relationship was four years let relation hold on I have just a question here though uh well
00:20:57
Brian Atlashow long have you been single like a year one year yeah and the one that ended a year ago was that the four-year relationship yeah okay uh a
00:21:08
Brian Atlasquestion though I think in your pre-show notes yeah you did indicate that you're single but still figuring things out with your ex could you clarify on that yeah it's really complicated he's like
00:21:19
Brian Atlasmy best friend so so I've known him for like is that the four year so you're you're single but still figuring out with your ex who you dated for 4 years years and you guys officially broke up one year ago yeah when's the last time you saw
00:21:32
Ashleyhim in person yesterday uh yeah yesterday this morning
00:21:43
Brian Atlasbro what yeah it's complicated um is it complicated it is wait so were you for the four-year period was it were you
00:21:53
Ashleymonogamous yeah I was was it oh you were yeah so he was was it open on his end or was he cheating on you he was [ __ ] around yeah he was doing but was but hold on
00:22:05
Ashleybut was it was it open on his end no it was not open okay so he was cheating on you how many women did he cheat on you with um well we were on a break and we
00:22:16
Ashleyboth agreed that we wouldn't cheat or I'm sorry we wouldn't hook up with anybody but he did so I count that as
00:22:26
Ashleycheating who initiated Break um we it was like Mutual Mutual it was Mutual why what prompted that we
00:22:37
Ashleywere fighting a lot and so we just thought we needed some time apart cuz we didn't want to end it
00:22:47
Q / Nataliecompletely what say it what do you think here what are you thinking here I'm thinking if you were going to work it out y'all should have stayed together you can't can't say he cheated because
00:22:59
Ashleyy'all want to break and he smashed some other well there's like other things to it too there was other stuff you know it's not just that one thing there was like other occasions it was just a lot
00:23:11
Ashleyit was just a lot and he's older than me so I feel like right now I'm 25 and I'm at my Prime how old is he
00:23:21
Ashleyhe's 31 okay is he not at his prime well yeah but like me more so me you're more you're more at your Prime 25 okay wait so how many times cuz you said you were
00:23:34
Ashleyon a break right had that happened multiple times that you guys we were on a break uh on again off again we were on and off and off again yeah oh multiple times multiple times how many times were
00:23:45
Brian Atlasyou would you say you were off and on for the duration of the um probably like three times of those three times who initiated the off I
00:23:57
Brian Atlasguess it was was both of us but like we would take turns I guess yeah well so once you once him two two times him two times I would say like half half you
00:24:08
Ashleysaid it three times H well to the end of it right oh okay my fault you guys fight about oh my gosh um well it was my first
00:24:19
Ashleytime living with a guy so like you know living with someone is like a whole different experience and I have certain OCD Tendencies and um what do you when you say OCD
00:24:32
Brian AtlasTendencies what are we talking about just like the way the kitchen needs to be leave the yeah just like cleansing this like stuff like that well that's not I don't think that's OCD if you prefer a clean well he's a really clean
00:24:44
Ashleyguy like I'm not saying that he wasn't clean oh so he was more clean than you no I was more of the clean one the more OCD one for sure just like stuff like that and it kind of just you know was it his place or yours it was his place were
00:24:57
Brian Atlasyou paying rent no okay so you were starting fights with him at his place where he paid rent about the nature of his apartment did
00:25:08
Brian Atlasyou have your own place at this time no okay so you were uh how soon into the relationship did you start living with him probably a year a year in okay yeah but I had known him since I was
00:25:20
Brian Atlas15 and we started dating wait hold on we started dating when I was 21 was he like a family friend or something family friend is that a little
00:25:31
Brian Atlasbit of impropriety there I'm not sure why it depends because he you're 25 he's 31 so that's a six-year age Gap yeah but we didn't start we didn't start no I'm
00:25:41
TTSnot saying you guys start dating then but there's perhaps a slight impropriety I I don't know if the panel concurs on that but grid One
00:25:53
TTSMotorsports donated $200 how are you still working shite out year after another woman has sucked his rager have some self-respect move the
00:26:03
TTSFon also the old hooker has a high likelihood of being the cat lady do you want to respond to the cat lady allegations um well I have a British short hair with my sister
00:26:15
Laurenso yeah I guess it's kind of like starting a little bit picted that yeah his name is sweet boy sweet boy and my boy is with an eye sweet boy really quick let me just pull this one up uh
00:26:27
Jordan / Jadewhatever fan well I haven't the slightest clue what the fellow British lady just said bloody hell it's like their favorite thing for me to say because it's from like Harry Potter or
00:26:37
Brian Atlassomething bloody L Harry bloody L they love that all right should should the whole panel just try to do a British accent for the rest of the show you guys down can you guys do British accents we'll just we could try we're going to
00:26:50
Brian Atlaspretend we're in Wales don't know if I'm particularly good at that that was a good one all right there you go okay uh so wait so to
00:27:00
Brian Atlasbring it back though to this uh so okay it's been it's been on and off multiple times um you said you've been
00:27:10
Brian Atlassingle for a year seeing yesterday but you are you still cohabitating with him no no
00:27:22
Brian Atlasyou're so okay when you guys broke up a year ago did you move out yeah okay so then how often cuz you saw him yesterday
00:27:33
Brian Atlasso yeah we're like how often do you see them really good friends yeah more than friends definitely more uh okay let me ask you a question did you have Cardinal knowledge yesterday no no you guys
00:27:46
Ashleydidn't you guys didn't have sex no why would you guys see each I'm just a little confused because why such a long it's been such a long relationship
00:27:55
Ashleybesides us dating you know and like he's like my best friend in a way and I understand it sounds super unhealthy and like that's why I'm saying like I'm trying to figure it out it's not like
00:28:07
Ashleythe most ideal situation and I wouldn't recommend it to like any of my friends sorry do you want to be with him um I do and I I do and I don't I do
00:28:18
Ashleybecause I love him so much but I don't because like I deserve more than that so she's still attached is good for you attached is he good for me now I think
00:28:27
Ashleyhe really is yeah like a good husband yeah he would be Vegas just get married yeah so if that's [ __ ] terrible
00:28:38
Adeline Staradvice that's terrible advice can I coming from Bali I'll be quick can I ask you a question so is the inability to commit on his behalf or your behalf good
00:28:49
Brian Atlasquestion uh definitely mine now okay yours also it switched yeah it's switched okay wait so question though so okay you guys broke up a year ago have
00:29:00
Brian Atlasyou guys you said you didn't hook up yesterday or this morning whatever you guys haven't hooked up at all since you broke up a year ago mhm that does that didn't sound very
00:29:13
Ashleyconvincing didn't look confident I don't really want to talk about my sex life per se I'm I'm open to talking about like my dating experience but not so much isn't it intertwined a little bit we don't need the details you don't need
00:29:26
Jordanhe hid it from the back like we don't right I'll need that I'll need those details it's been a long time it's been a long time so like cleaniness is like kind of a nagging thing it's not necessarily like a fundamental argument
00:29:38
Ashleywhat was like the big issues it was just a lot of the times it was that like living together and then also just you know like him with like I would find [ __ ] on his
00:29:48
Ashleyphone oh just like constant girl stuff that would like trigger me a lot yeah so move to and we also like sorry we also
00:29:58
AshleyAl like it would go out a lot um and I think that also triggered a lot of stuff so so why is the inab uh inability to commit on your end right now why are you
00:30:10
Ashleybecause he obviously wants to get back together with me but it's a little bit more difficult for me how come cuz I still hold on to the past
00:30:21
Laurenyour trust is broken yeah mhm are you sure you trust him like you said he's marage material but yeah that's another thing is I think about if I were to have babies with this man like it's not just
00:30:33
Ashleyme now it's like these kids that we would have and I don't know if that like that's what scares me you know I can't I'm not just like taking care of myself
00:30:43
Ashleyanymore it's like the future so so you don't trust him I don't know I feel like I do trust him but I don't know how long I'm going to trust him on the grid One Motorsports donated
00:30:55
TTS$200 [ __ ] you are the most groomed woman I have ever seen on the show seriously get help get away from the cheater and find yourself a heater the
00:31:06
Brian Atlaspatriarchy stands ready to help get better yo grid one thank you man good to see you in the chat grid one the legend He's a brave and a decent man he's a pioneer he's a Pioneer um do you want to
00:31:18
Brian Atlasrespond to grid One Motorsports that was like so insulting but also like a compliment and then yeah the get help part was what was the compliment part a
00:31:28
Brian Atlas[ __ ] he yeah he he did I think it was like an in an endearing way though like he's looking out for you well then thanks but also talking M [ __ ] just the wrong vocab but the message was there
00:31:41
Jordanappreciate it I'm working on it disregard uh you know they're just it was just for dramatic effects it was for dramatic effects dram do you feel like you're holding on to like do you think maybe you're holding on to what could be
00:31:52
Ashleyyou're holding on to maybe this story but it's not for sure because like I envisioned my entire life with him You Know M do it you invested a long time yeah exactly mhm yeah I'm I'm just oh go
00:32:05
Ashleyahead go ahead no it's been like a total of six years mhm that before like we officially got together four years ago but it I was also like dealing with him for two years prior to that so it's just
00:32:16
Adeline Stara long time that I have another question I didn't mean to interrupt so is he your technically first love I think so yeah okay wait what do you mean you think so well because I've had high school really
00:32:27
Ashleyrelationships and you say y I love you but he was he's definitely like the first how tall is he uh
00:32:37
Ashley5'9 is he Rich yeah he has money what's he do for work he's a chiropractor oh okay he doesn't have enough money to be cheating on you no
00:32:49
Ashleythere's no amount of money you can have to cheat's but there that's really like shocking um huh you saw him yesterday when you say you hold on just
00:33:02
Brian Atlasto be clear did you spend the night at his place or did he spend the night at yours no you said you saw him this morning yeah how would you have seen him this
00:33:12
Brian Atlasyou guys just I saw him this morning so I went to get breakfast no I just went over before I you didn't spend the night no you didn't sleep over
00:33:25
Ashleyno so you just that is that normal for like most people no it's not normal I'm not saying this is normal like I said I would not tell my girlfriends to do it
00:33:34
Brian Atlasbut like I can't help it you love him I love just a connection yeah but I'm working on it wait you still you love
00:33:43
Brian Atlashim still of course you mean after just to be clear you've been single for a year single for a
00:33:52
Brian Atlasyear he cheated on you and you still love him couple other clar F questions uh have you dated any other guys in this
00:34:02
Ashleyoneyear period yeah I tried but it was an unsuccessful why uh I don't know I guess I just
00:34:13
Ashleywasn't ready when I started dating again I wasn't ready and it just felt weird I would compare like everybody to him I just said No One Compares so I just like
00:34:23
Adeline Stargave it its time you know his hold on her is too strong wow that's all it is I would think she and me but especially when that's like all you know yeah that's why I think it's your
00:34:35
Ashleyfirst love because that she she said she had those are the worst heartbreaks but that's high school yeah I feel like high school was okay um have were you
00:34:46
Ashleyintimate with any of these other men or no um I'd rather not
00:34:54
Brian Atlassay I'm just going to take that for a yes then I mean refusal I'm just going to take it for yes I mean
00:35:05
Ashleyum are you on are you trying to date at all are you on any dating apps I don't really like dating apps I've never been on one but like no and I'm kind of just
00:35:14
Brian Atlasopen to whatever but um how did you meet these other guys you said you went on some other dates and stuff Instagram they would DM you or something
00:35:26
Brian Atlasokay when's the most what's the most recent time you've been on a date with a different guy a couple months ago a couple months ago okay
00:35:42
Brian Atlasuh I feel like you're not telling us all the details with with all of this but um I'm I'm giving as much as I can does this guy know you're going on these
00:35:53
Laurenstates he did yeah and does it make him jealous yeah and does does that make you feel like he loves you when he gets jealous no not really given his sexual
00:36:04
Brian Atlasinvolvement with other women during the relationship is there any doubt that he's currently sexually involved with at least one woman I don't think so I don't I really don't think so but hold on wait
00:36:16
Brian Atlashold on just to be clear while you were in a monogamous relationship with him I get what you're saying hold on hold on hold on while you were dating him in a monogamous relationship he was sexually involved with multiple other women but
00:36:28
Brian Atlasnow that you guys are broken up now he's celibate I find that dubious at best he's probably I assume he's sexually involved with at least one other woman women possibly
00:36:39
Brian Atlasmultiple you do you have no evidence for this no does he I don't go you saw him did you talk to him about yeah I mean he tells me he's not doing anything so that's probably what he told you when
00:36:52
Ashleyyou were together with him right what would he say when you would find stuff on his phone when you guys were together uh you confront him right yeah
00:37:01
Laurenthat he was just like drunk or oh gosh upset oh or something what was he doing talking or looking at people's pictures sliding into people's DM sliding into
00:37:12
Ashleythe DMS type stuff oh my gosh wait did you go through his phone yeah without his permission yeah she has good instincts well I just felt something was
00:37:23
TTShappening ma grid One Motorsports donated $200 just be honest the groomer interfered in every date you even thought of having you need fukin help dude is on his couch
00:37:35
Brian Atlaswith a chick on his lap right now watching you s I'm not evening um so you don't want to get back with him or is that cope and you actually like you're still madly in love with him and you want back no I don't
00:37:48
Brian Atlaswant to get back with him so why why are you still hanging out with him you saw him this morning what was the nature of your hangout this morning to to talk yeah he's like my he's like a best friend for me it's familiarity and
00:38:01
Jordancomfortability but can you guys be friends without entertaining the possibility of being together maybe we'll see no if you could you would have by now I don't I don't know that's possible with your guys's
00:38:12
Jordanhistory and I think um I think that's the problem with taking breaks because regardless of whether taking a break is considered being single for that short
00:38:24
Jordanperiod of time you're going to hold on to whatever that person did while they were on the break and you're going to remember that it's going to replay in your head over and over and over again doesn't go away so you have to make a
00:38:36
Jordandecision in my opinion this is what I would do if I were you cuz I had EG like this and it was like constant but what I would say is either
00:38:45
Laurendecide to not talk anymore or work it out yeah but he was cheating on her even when they weren't on a break cuz he was dming girls right yeah so he I mean he's
00:38:55
Brian Atlasnot loyal he's not a loyal guy she doesn't give a [ __ ] I think you're not being fully hold on hold on I I think there's more to the story that you're letting on you're still hanging out with
00:39:07
Brian Atlashim you saw him yesterday did you see him yesterday too you hung out with him yesterday no I saw him yesterday sorry I saw him yesterday how often do you see him wait you saw him yesterday and this morning and this
00:39:22
Brian Atlasmorning Q do you just like like to hang out with girls just to like chitchat go to
00:39:29
Adeline Starbrunch n hang out with girls that I'm [ __ ] right I mean okay can I just say something and I don't want to turn this on to like we're
00:39:41
Adeline Starharping on you or beating you down or we're trying to it's coming from like a place of like best interest and it hurts to kind of hear that so I just want to like share something and I hope that it resonates you but every minute you spend
00:39:53
Adeline Starwith him is taking away from time and opportunity of spending it with someone who actually going to Value you and love you and who's going to give you what you really need because it sounds like he doesn't value you and that you he just
00:40:05
Adeline Starhas you sitting and like like I have chills right now cuz it sounds like he just he knows that you're going to be there you know and going to take a while so um I don't know I feel like I also
00:40:16
Ashleyjust recently realized like I've turned him into the perfect guy and now now someone else can like um someone else can like reap those reward you're in love with the potential you're in love
00:40:27
Brian Atlaswith ex hold on hold on hold on hold on you turn how did you turn him into the perfect guy what do you mean cuz he's so great now you know but after you met him
00:40:38
Brian AtlasI think just exit get married have your babies cuz you know he's going to do this wait hold on just to be clear God he's the perfect guy but he was [ __ ] multiple other women now now he is I'm
00:40:50
Ashleysaying when's the last time you've gone through his phone I haven't I don't even care to go through his phone wait hold on just to be clear you were you were in a sexual relationship
00:41:03
Ashleywith him when he wasn't perfect now that he's perfect you have no interest in it just feels a little too late but I don't know that yet for sure so that's
00:41:14
Laurenwhat I'm trying to figure out like is it too late or can I still figure this out with him I think as long as happiness is there just like we only live one time you know so like as long as it's there
00:41:25
Brian Atlaslike get married enjoy it this is terrible advice this is like I don't like I don't know if people at the table or the
00:41:34
Brian Atlasviewers are hearing this like what I'm hearing but she's going to do what she's going to do so but like can I say bloody H imagine I feel the Situation's
00:41:46
Brian Atlasabsolutely [ __ ] I feel [ __ ] terrible for the next guy oh wow I feel terrible for the next guy I'm actually I'm not like that I wouldn't I wouldn't
00:41:59
Brian Atlasdrag what I've been through into the next relationship you've been single for a year and you're still you're hung you hung out with your ex this morning yeah but if I were to start talking to a guy
00:42:10
Ashleyand meeting guy and that was his boundary as to like hey I don't want you talking to this guy if I if he shows me that like he's worth that then I would I
00:42:20
Q / Nataliewould stop talking to him if if he show yeah if he shows you who initiated who initiates the hangout do y'all talk every day do y'all text do y'all no not every day every day does he think you
00:42:32
Q / Natalieguys are well he knows that we're trying to figure it out so does he think you're his girlfriend no he doesn't he knows I'm not his girlfriend so what does it mean when you say another guy would have
00:42:43
Laurento prove that he wor not that he needs to prove but I would just have to feel an in like a connection with that guy how are you going to feel a connection with the new guy if you have this thing
00:42:55
Ashleyopen with this old guy because call you go run it that's a valid point I don't know yet guys I'm figuring it out but these are these are good these are good things I'm go home
00:43:07
Brian Atlasand going to be okay with that no you need you this isn't hold on let me this is a [ __ ] intervention this is an intervention [ __ ] that I'm going to go home and figure it out and have him come
00:43:20
TTSover tomorrow and we're going to talk about it this is what honestly you need hold on I I'll get to it after donated $200 thank you Nickelodeon it's a miracle we finally found the who fixed
00:43:31
TTSthe man she's obsessed with move on marry a good man that loves you only so you can leave you cuz you fantasize about your ex's peen what does that even
00:43:41
Brian Atlasmean Nickelodeon Shakespearean he speaks in poetry thank you Nickelodeon appreciate it man he's saying if you date somebody new you I'll always be
00:43:51
TTSthinking about my ex I don't think so grid One Motorsports donated to $200 perfect guys do not cheat on their
00:44:01
TTSgirlfriends dude is not perfect you are not a fol can doormat move on you cannot fix this dude course he knows for a fact
00:44:10
Brian Atlashe can [ __ ] around and you will take it okay thank you good one Motorsports well put appreciate the uh message good to see you in the chat okay intervention
00:44:22
Brian Atlasall right [ __ ] this I'm going to go home and I'm going to think about it I'm going to meditate I'm going to meditate on what I heard from the whatever podcast I'm going to consult with him and we might cut a little we're going to cud a little
00:44:34
Brian Atlasbit and he's we're probably going to have carnal knowledge and intercourse whatever um honestly you're you're potentially like I think it was you who said this you're going to [ __ ] it up for like that next
00:44:47
Brian Atlasguy that comes around because if I was that next guy and if I was that perfect next guy and I heard that you're still like involved with your ex and you just hung out with him that's a deal breaker
00:44:59
TTSkiller of cereal donated $200 he's had it once he's going to want it again you say it's just talk but you're old news ever since he moved on
00:45:10
Brian Atlasin more than one way he's trying to see what he can get out of you move on well put well put KB serial here's the intervention you need to block him right now we'll give you your phone back you
00:45:22
Brian Atlasneed to block him right now you need to make a commitment you're never going to see this guy again if if you want to send them a text be like Hey listen this isn't healthy um I wish you the best but
00:45:33
Brian AtlasI don't think I can continue seeing you seeing you anymore uh I think you should do that right now here on the podcast because I mean I don't know if there's a
00:45:42
Brian Atlasconsensus here if y'all concur this ain't going to work it has to end now half of them are telling her to marry him just Gerald donated
00:45:52
TTS$200 complete separation is your only recourse r off the Band-Aid break your own heart and allow yourself to be whole again you're too young so much potential
00:46:05
Ashleythere's there's a guy out there that will be loyal to you like you I agree I agree I agree I'm not saying that like MH I'm not going to I'm not trying or
00:46:16
AshleyI'm I'm just like not considering any other guys I'm just saying right now that's my situation but that's why I can't get back with him because I also agree like the right I think I'll meet a guy who's also learned the same lessons
00:46:28
Ashleymaybe that I've learned or he's already done the [ __ ] [ __ ] and then you know I will be valued for like who who I
00:46:37
Adeline Staram cuz I'm a very loyal person I never all the times I never did anything to um to kind of get back at him or anything like that and you can hold on to that you can hold on to your loyalty but your
00:46:49
Ashleybeautiful years of in your 20s and for I said I'm in my Prime and and you're 20 and you're wasting them on this guy trying to that's why I'm not getting back with him but you have him on
00:47:01
Brian Atlasthe you're still hanging it wait what did you catch she just said she's not getting back with him well so what are you doing then ex you just say I was
00:47:11
Brian Atlastrying to figure things out I guess I'm slowly ripping off the band slowly slowly ripping off the bandid that's an oxymoron no he's on the back burner
00:47:23
Ashleyshe's got him on the back burner Bur he's on the back burner it's complicated could I ask a question but he's also so intertwined in my family life my friend my God wait hold okay anyways I don't want to talk about this
00:47:36
Ashleyanymore you love him unconditionally there's an unconditional love yeah definitely that doesn't exist there's no un I just recently learned that that like unconditional love is not real isn't it like
00:47:48
Laurenunrequited love isn't that the only unconditional love that exists that's like a that's like a a poem or something yeah there's a poem says the only real conditional love is love unrequited and that i' heard it
00:48:00
Jordan / Jadeonline what were you saying go ahead I was just going to say that even if it's unconditional whatever word you want to use you can do that from a distance you can love him from afar but you have to let it go and you have to move on you
00:48:12
Jordan / Jadehave to heal yourself direct that love to yourself Jade thank you Jade is that not good I disag I disagree being silly I
00:48:23
Brian Atlasdisagree here's what you got to do all right check [ __ ] out right I gave you the advice you've got to [ __ ] listen listen this is what you're going to do right you got we're going to give you
00:48:34
Brian Atlasback the your phone all right we're going to give you back the phone oh my God I'm losing no okay but hold on hold on my terms you're going to do it on your terms that look look you you don't
00:48:46
Brian Atlaswant to get back with him right that's what she said like 100% you never are going to have sex with him again you're never going to date this guy again correct she can't look don't even say it
00:48:58
Brian Atlaslisten listen listen she's not you're not being you're not being like full full on with us go she watching right now I'm humiliating myself right now no you're not you can't imagine your life
00:49:10
Q / Nataliewithout him hold on guys go ahead K you you can't imagine your life without him he has a rolling in life he's been a priority in life mm for as long as you've been romantically involved with
00:49:21
Q / Nataliehim maybe even prior and the only way the only way that you can get rid of that feeling is to go without talking to him the fact every time you talk to him
00:49:32
Q / Nataliethe same circuit of your brain that light up that's attached or relit you put yourself right back in the same situation you are clinging to something you clinging to Hope even even even if you sitting here
00:49:43
Q / Nataliesaying you won't get back with him your actions show that you're still hopeful that you guys can work something out and be together down the line you have to cut off all ties you have to go cold
00:49:55
Brian Atlasturkey that is the only way and and just to add to what Q is saying and I think other a few other people here have mentioned this this isn't radical advice we're giving you I think the the norm when it comes to the end of a
00:50:06
Brian Atlasrelationship you can't keep hanging out with the person you just broke up with it has to be like a a uh like cold turkey hard stop you can't you've been broken up you s you claim to be single
00:50:18
Ashleyfor a year but you're it's a lot harder to do it cuz like I know if I was my own friend and I was she was telling what she was going going through I would also be like you just have to not but it is a
00:50:29
Ashleylot harder it's not hard do it it hard you no no no you well okay but sometimes the process of might be difficult I'm I'm more of like a an emotional person and then you're more I could tell you're
00:50:40
Jordanmore of a logical person so it's easier for you to like just well that's but sometimes you have to um when it comes to making those decisions because your emotions are so
00:50:52
Jordaninvolved you actually need to think about this objectively you need to put yourself in a position of seeing this objectively and what is the best decision like make a list of pros and cons right is this person making me
00:51:05
Jordanhappy are they fulfilling me are they challenging me do they love me are they loyal to me sounds like a lot of those are no I would say your best bet this is
00:51:14
Jordanthis is for your happiness in the long run is to literally walk away it's going to hurt it's going to suck you're going to cry you're going to need your friends you're going to need all your friends
00:51:24
Jordan / Jaderight now and everything positive but you have to go through that suck yeah you know what I mean you have to go through that and you'll be so proud of yourself years like wow I was so strong
00:51:35
Ashleythat day maybe less than two years don't worry it'll be okay M the future I thought we weren't doing therapy okay okay thank you guys I appreciate it I
00:51:47
Brian Atlasappreciate the advice from all you you appreciate the advice I but I do want to hopefully get a confirmation from you right here right now show I'll let you know no no no no no no hold on hold on
00:51:59
Brian Atlasyou've just been like advised she's married she's given you good advice uh you're in a relationship for well we'll come back to your
00:52:07
Brian Atlassituation uh um Q's a dating coach I it just do you I here's what I
00:52:18
Brian Atlasthink we need right are you can you make a commitment here on the whatever podcast that this this is over you're really trying to
00:52:27
Brian Atlassave me well don't save you from yourself you don't want to be saved like like I said I and I'm telling you I think the best thing like if you
00:52:40
Brian Atlaswant to take Massive Action do massive change right cuz you you like you said you could like slowly rip off the Band-Aid which again doesn't really make sense you could do something step out of
00:52:52
Brian Atlasyour comfort zone right here right now we'll give you your phone you can send them a text be like like hey this isn't going to work anymore and block him you don't owe you don't owe this guy anything he was cheating on you during
00:53:05
Q / Nataliethe relationship now look I get it maybe you want to do I don't know in person I don't know no could she can't do it and the reason she can't do it is because she's not giving us all the details of
00:53:16
Q / Nataliethe state of their relationship he apparently has done things that she cherishes that she values appreciates respects and cl he's not a complete monster but we're not saying that but that's what she's clinging to that's why
00:53:28
Rahimashe can't block you so how heavily intertwined is it is like he has he has um does he pay your rent or something yeah is there like Financial intertwining happening you guys were like friends for years right and you're
00:53:42
Adeline Stara family friends so you're worried about losing a friendship yeah it's difficult it's like they're asking you to go cold turkey she's saying wean yourself off and you're just trying to figure out where you need to be but I just want you
00:53:55
Adeline Starto think about every every minute you're spending with him you are taking away from time that you can be finding yourself even more and establishing your own independence and growing into your
00:54:05
Jordanown and that's that's I just thank you that's such a good point I'm just curious like she needs to be ready though like you can't make that decision for her she can just unblock
00:54:18
Laurenthem after the show you know what I mean at some point I think it's going to come down to just accepting like what you know is true if you really felt like he wasn't ever going to cheat on you again you saw that he was different somehow I
00:54:31
Laurendon't know what that would take but then you wouldn't hesitate you know it's true like you know it's just getting to the point where you accept it and do whatever it takes to move on can I ask you a straightup question do you want to
00:54:44
Brian Atlasget back with him I don't know she is back with him I'm not back with him emot but what do you mean you don't know I that's what
00:54:55
AshleyI'm in like I don't think I do I don't think I do but I am still attached to like the Friendship part of it are you okay if he's like dating someone else I've thought about that and I'm kind of
00:55:08
Ashleygetting close to that point where I would wish him the best okay you're getting close to the yeah like obviously I don't know maybe it would make me upset upset cuz
00:55:19
Q / Natalielike I say that now you're not dating it's not your call who he dates if he was dating someone else would you keep hanging out with him as friends no you don't what if he is he probably is dating I don't think so wait wait
00:55:32
Brian Atlaswait are you waiting for him to move on first to give you conf I'm not okay no I'm not I have a question let's say you meet a guy who you like and he likes you what do you think that guy is going to
00:55:43
Brian Atlasthink of this situation that you currently have going on with your ex that it's a complicated sticky situation any guy worth his salt worth
00:55:54
Brian Atlaslike who's worth anything you tell and I hope you would disclose this because this would this is a potential major conflict for a future relationship that you're going to have with another guy grid One Motorsports