Andrew Wilson HEATED DEBATE With Female Dating Coach?! E-GIRLS! ( ° °) | Dating Talk #175
Date: 2024-07-03
Duration: 7h 10m
Guests
Brian AtlasIdentified Speakers
SPEAKER_00TTS / donation reader(audience)
SPEAKER_01Brian Atlas(host)
SPEAKER_02Adeline(guest)
SPEAKER_03Cross-talk / clip(audience)
SPEAKER_04Cross-talk / crew(audience)
SPEAKER_05Panel guests (mixed)(guest)
SPEAKER_06Jelle (brief)(guest)
SPEAKER_07Nick (crew)(audience)
SPEAKER_08Elsa(guest)
SPEAKER_09Background(audience)
SPEAKER_10TTS / donation reader(audience)
SPEAKER_11Andrew Wilson(guest)
SPEAKER_12Background / crew(audience)
SPEAKER_13Background(audience)
SPEAKER_14Sammy Joe(guest)
Key Moments
00:03:53
IntroAdeline introduces herself: 26yo, OnlyFans model/streamer/media personality, from LA.
“hi I'm Adeline I am an only fans model model streamer media personality I'm 26 and I live in LA”
00:04:08
IntroSammy Joe introduces herself: 28yo, IFBB bikini pro, online health & fitness coach, streamer, San Diego; has competition in ~2.5 weeks.
“hi my name is Samy Joe I am from San Diego I am 28 and I am an ifbb bikini Pro online health and fitness coach streamer and content creator”
00:06:13
IntroAyana introduces herself: 22yo, Santa Barbara, singer.
“I'm Ayana um I'm 22 and from Santa Barbara and I'm a singer”
00:07:27
IntroElsa introduces herself: 32yo, Austin TX, dating coach for men (7.5 years, 600-700 clients). Has bachelor's in marketing and psychology.
“hi I'm Elsa I'm 32 I'm from Austin Texas and I am a dating coach for men”
00:08:21
IntroMorgan introduces herself: 18yo, Bay Area, SBCC first year, studying political science.
“I'm Morgan I'm 18 I'm from the Bay Area and I currently go to Santa Barbara City College”
00:09:12
IntroAndrea introduces herself: 23yo, LA, model/actress/fashion stylist/musician.
“I'm Andrea I am from Los Angeles California I'm 23 years old and um I'm a model I'm an actress I'm a Fashion Stylist”
00:09:51
IntroJelle begins introduction: 23yo, studying for bachelor's in business management — intro cut off by TTS donation.
“hello everyone my name is jelle I'm 23 I am studying to get my bachelor's in degree wait sorry in business and um manage”
00:11:19
IntroMaddie introduces herself: 19yo, San Diego, lives in Santa Barbara, works for Whatever podcast, SBCC student.
“my name is Madison I'm 19 I'm from San Diego and I live in Santa Barbara I work for the whatever podcast”
00:11:39
IntroAndrew Wilson introduced remotely: host of The Crucible, fastest-growing debate channel on YouTube (his claim), political analyst.
“yeah my name is Andrew Wilson I'm the host of The Crucible it's the fastest growing debate Channel on YouTube to my knowledge I'm a political saturnist a political analyst and I like to occasionally engage in a bit of debate”
04:00:32
OtherPanel reacts to street interview clip of a 26yo woman saying she would use a guilt-free pass for professional athletes (Lindy Waters III, Barry Sanders Jr.) in front of her 22yo boyfriend. Brian and panel: instant breakup.
“26 22 how long you've been together 2 years if she gave you a guilt-free pass to sleep with anybody would you take it... I would take it that's crazy”
04:30:00
ControversyAndrew Wilson confronts Andrea over her claim of being a 10: if she is a 10 and everyone is beautiful, can she point to the prettiest girl in the room? Extended back-and-forth on objective vs subjective beauty. Andrea refuses to single out anyone; Andrew argues this is "coping."
“wouldn't a person who was ugly know ugly when they saw it... the thing is is you're not actually engaging with the spirit of the question”
04:43:20
Key MomentAdeline concedes Andrew's wife Rachel is prettier than her when pressed. Adeline says Rachel is "beautiful" and "prettier than me." Andrew uses this to expose inconsistency in others' "everyone is a 10" positions.
“I think she's prettier she's got so much... yes she is beautiful okay great is she prettier than the girl next to you”
06:05:00
ControversyAndrew challenges Elsa's claim that Charisma can be taught. He argues the baseline must exist innately. Elsa defends her coaching methodology by analogy to teaching sales. Both sides partially agree on the role of potential vs actualization.
“wouldn't they need to have some baseline inside of their personality core some kind of Baseline Charisma where they even had the potential”
06:54:50
OtherBrian asks Adeline and Sammy to consider stopping sex work at show close; both decline. Adeline: "you start paying my bills." Sammy frames it as a personal kink/exhibitionism. Andrew asks Sammy if she would do it unpaid; she confirms the kink preceded OF.
“would you both consider stopping sex work entirely... delete your only fans you start paying my bills I'm good”
Topics Discussed
00:00:00
Show intro and guest introductions
Brian opens the show with standard announcements (Streamlabs, Twitch, Discord, Patreon, merch). Guests introduce themselves: Adeline (26, LA, OnlyFans model/streamer), Sammy Joe (28, San Diego, IFBB bikini pro/fitness coach), Ayana (22, Santa Barbara, singer), Elsa (32, Austin TX, men's dating coach), Morgan (18, East Bay/SBCC, political science), Andrea (23, LA, model/actress), Jelle (23, auto shop manager/student), Maddie (19, SBCC/Whatever staff). Andrew Wilson introduced by satellite as host of The Crucible at [11:39].
00:13:00
Relationship status round
Brian asks each guest their current relationship status, length of single time, and longest relationship. Adeline: in a relationship 6 months (BF Zach, both retired from mainstream adult content). Sammy Joe: married 2 years, together 6. Ayana: relay-situationship ~1 year, no title, bisexual. Elsa: engaged since Christmas Eve (4 years together). Morgan: single 2 months, 3-year HS relationship ended (she broke it off — ex stopped planning dates). Andrea: single 3-4 months, broke up by ex (emotionally unavailable businessman, still works with him). Jelle: in a relationship/situationship. Maddie: single. Sidebar: Morgan/ex "we need to talk" text discussion and laundry-on-first-date anecdote.
00:36:00
Age gap debate
Extended discussion on age gaps in relationships: is a 44yo man dating a 20yo woman creepy? Brian presents the question; Elsa finds it "a little creepy" (prefrontal cortex argument). Andrew Wilson argues the motive is purely looks-based. Macron/wife dynamic discussed (she was 40, he was 15 as a student). Ayana argues everyone counts from 18 as "year zero" of adult experience. Andrew debates Elsa on whether it's wrong to set age filters. Sammy Jo: fine if it's mutual preference. Panel divided on whether it's "wrong" vs "weird." Andrew argues it's a looks filter.
01:00:00
Men stopping effort after commitment / relationship dynamics
Brian and Andrew discuss whether men reasonably reduce effort after securing a partner. Comparison made to women letting themselves go in long-term relationships. Elsa argues equivalent failure is women becoming less effort on appearance. Sammy and Ayana discuss how men put in effort early then coast once they "have you." Morgan's ex situation as a case study: he stopped planning dates. Audience TTS chimes in. Andrew questions whether serving partners is a feminist concept.
02:00:00
Attractiveness, confidence, and approach
Discussion on whether women prefer confident or nervous men approaching them. Panel consensus: confident approach preferred. Andrew argues confidence compounds attractiveness. Brian expands: overconfidence reads differently depending on the man's attractiveness. Elsa and Sammy discuss red hair / emotional expression tangent from audience TTS. Whether confidence can be taught vs is innate debated.
02:40:00
Waiting until marriage / religion and sex
Andrea (possibly Jelle per mixing) — identified as Christian, pro-waiting-until-marriage. Brian and the panel explore her reasoning. Religious denomination not specified (non-denominational). Goes to church. Does not date outside her values. Contrast with Adeline's adult content career. Discussion: does waiting until marriage make sense from a secular standpoint? Brian presents the argument that women who sleep quickly with some men but make others wait is inconsistent. Elsa frames compatibility as the key factor. Andrew and Brian debate the implications for men who wait.
04:00:00
Reacting to street interview clip: guilty-free pass
Nick plays a clip (Desirable Truth or similar) of a 26yo woman saying she would use a "guilt-free pass" to sleep with professional athletes (Lindy Waters III, Barry Sanders Jr.) in front of her 22yo boyfriend. Panel reacts. Brian: instant breakup. Elsa: "typically worrisome." Sammy: she had those answers too ready. Andrew points out the boyfriend should have walked.
04:30:00
Looks ratings round
Audience TTS requests guests rate their looks on a 1-10 scale (no 7s allowed). Sammy: 6 (downgraded from prior 10 due to weight gain and hair dye change). Ayana: 7.5-7.9. Morgan: 8.5. Andrea: 10 (disputed). Elsa: 10 initially. Brian: 5-6. Andrew (remote): 4. Extended debate between Andrew and Andrea on whether Andrea can logically claim to be a 10 while insisting everyone is beautiful. Andrew argues Elsa's wife (Rachel) rates herself a 6 and that is more honest. Adeline says Andrew's wife is prettier than her. Discussion on objective vs subjective beauty standards.
04:56:40
Plastic surgery / aesthetic enhancements discussion
Brian states plastic surgery makes women less attractive in his view (real example: fake breasts detectable under clothing). Sammy and Elsa discuss surgeries beyond implants. Panel discusses whether plastic surgery can elevate a "5 to a 9" vs natural beauty. Brian: maximum potential is capped by natural baseline. Referenced example: celebrity/model photos shown on-screen. "Labiaplasty" mentioned as extreme case at [328:01].
05:50:00
Dating coach legitimacy debate — Elsa vs Andrew Wilson
Andrew Wilson questions Elsa's credentials and value proposition as a men's dating coach. Is it fraudulent for a woman to coach men on dating women? Elsa defends her methodology; 600-700 clients, teaching confidence/social skills/Charisma. Andrew: Charisma cannot be taught; it must be innate. Elsa: Charisma can be taught like sales technique — timing, tonality, listening, storytelling. Andrew: does Charisma potential require an underlying baseline personality trait? Both sides partially concede. Brian mediates. Chat heavily sides with Andrew.
06:53:20
Body count round and closing
Quick body count round at show close. Maddie's answer cut off/redirected. Panel answers (SPEAKER_05 mixed): Sammy/Ayana range mentioned ("single digit," similar to last appearance). Morgan: single digit (plead fifth on roster details). Jelle/Andrea: four. Adeline: misheard by Brian as "800" (she said "gosh"). Brian asks Adeline and Sammy to consider stopping sex work; both decline. Andrew asks Sammy if she would do OnlyFans for free (kink-driven); she eventually says she recorded herself before OF existed, so yes it pre-dates the platform. Show ends with raid announcement and final call to like/subscribe.
Transcript
Page 4 of 8
02:49:47
Brian Atlasanyways uh but anyways so they'll they'll be fine with having a man inside of them but
02:49:58
Sammy Joethey draw the line at a bow I just I don't get it you know right Morgan it could be that there's Mutual beneficial and pleasure in penetration
02:50:10
Sammy Joebut she might not find benefit in about or pleasure in about if she's not a submissive person she doesn't want to bow for you but
02:50:22
Sammy Joepenetrate her there's benefit and pleasure there I don't know I'm just playing devil what if there's a what if there's a condom if I honestly if if if I have if there's a condom involved I'm doing her
02:50:35
Sammy Joea favor with the sex I mean with the sex like it's just like I'd rather just not I know this is going to sound crazy I I've already mentioned this previous shows I'd rather just not even have sex have you ever seen the meme of like it's
02:50:48
Sammy Joelike Kermit the Frog and he's like by the window and the out the window's like wet and it's like rain that's why they call it window pain can we find that name maybe it's like
02:50:59
Panel guests (mixed)one it's to wet but you can't you can't feel it cuz you have a what the [ __ ] you never seen that of woman where like she won't want to bow down but she'll let you like nut inside her whatever is
02:51:10
Panel guests (mixed)maybe because she's like maybe really into that masculine side of her and maybe she has like this wall built up that she doesn't
02:51:20
Panel guests (mixed)feel comfortable or willing to go into that feminine side of like submissive side sounds like she's taking the nut instead of receiving exactly she's a nut
02:51:32
Brian Atlastaker that's a good way that's a good way to look at it not give me that enough you got it is it the
02:51:45
Cross-talk / crewKermit it's facts it's facts facts damn hold on wait keep it up for a sec keep it up it's the funniest I've
02:51:58
Brian Atlasever word um anyways where were we uh let's get to uh we got Elsa here Elsa you said that you're you had you did have a disagreement Elsa you said you're not a huge fan of
02:52:10
Brian Atlasoversimplification and inflammatory language is this directed at me or Andrew or both honestly neither I I I've only seen very short clips of the show
02:52:21
Brian AtlasOkay so this but but in general not a fan of overs oversimplification well was there like a specific clip or something you saw was it something Maddie said Maddie's got some hot takes she's been
02:52:33
Elsacancelled multiple times yeah actually just kidding she's I get I got haters actually I was told that you were Adrian was like my friend Adrian who was on the show she was like mty's super cool look
02:52:44
Brian Atlasfor Maddie so learn you screed your mic that way and left tilt it to the left no no no like push it here okay there you go and then tilt it down a little bit but go
02:53:00
Andrew Wilsonahead um no not directed at MD is this better on the over simplification front earlier when we were talking in generalities isn't that
02:53:10
Andrew Wilsonoversimplification definitely yeah we both got into that both got into generalizing what's wrong with an over like here's an oversimplification men generally prefer to date men who or women prefer generally to date men who
02:53:23
Elsaare taller than them that's an oversimplification right that's true my challenge with oversimplification is it makes for great clickbait but when you actually work with real people it
02:53:34
Elsadoesn't those aren't usually the situations that occur like of course in general most women would prefer to date someone who makes more money than them in general most men prefer to date
02:53:44
Elsasomeone who's younger because she's probably more attractive but those oversimplifications don't hold true when you actually apply Theory to practice so I've actually like I because I've worked
02:53:56
Elsawith so many men over the years those aren't the situations that I see normally people date more or less people who are in their vicinity who are usually a similar age range similar socioeconomic status so that's my
02:54:08
Andrew Wilsonproblem with it but I do think that it makes more for a more spicy and interesting conversation really so even on the micro the men that you're working with you
02:54:19
Elsadon't tell them that women prefer taller men well not if they're not no women do prefer that but a taller man is relative an average woman is 5'2 so a taller man
02:54:31
Andrew Wilsonfor an average woman not relative it would be anything taller than 5'2 right anything taller than her wouldn't be relative so if she was what I mean is what I mean is that
02:54:41
ElsaI'm 57 and for me a taller man is technically a man who's 6 feet although historically man would be somebody who's 5 58 or 5'8 whatever most of the guys I've dated are
02:54:52
Elsamy height but um where was I going with this but you would prefer who was taller right honestly before I moved to the states I did not even know this was a
02:55:04
Elsathing cuz I was I didn't grow up here so in Lebanon where I'm from men are not tall the average man is a little bit shorter than I am so that wasn't really
02:55:14
Elsaan option so I didn't really see it as a preference it was a Lebanese woman is much smaller than the average Lebanese Man true true so but when I moved here and I realized that that was like a
02:55:26
Elsacollective preference that's when I started to notice that people even really cared about that I think from my work what I've seen is that women want a man they can feel safe with but he doesn't have to be bigger than her in
02:55:38
Andrew Wilsonheight he can be bigger than her horizontally in stature that's yeah know but I I well I get it that on the micro you can you can do all sorts of self-improvement as a man who is shorter
02:55:49
Elsauh you can be get buffer and you know what they call looks maxing all that but that doesn't change the fact that um most women are still going to prefer if if he's taller than her if they had the
02:56:00
Andrew Wilsonoption definitely yes if all things like over simplification that's just also true well that the rest of that sentence was oversimplification and inflammatory
02:56:11
Elsalanguage so an overs simplication in of itself might not be a problem but when it's married to inflammatory language it can be but I'm not but but at the same time like I when I first started my Tik
02:56:23
ElsaTok the I believe the reason why I went viral so often is because I was extremely inflammatory like I was just extremely condescending and I had a lot of hot takes on a lot of hot topics and
02:56:33
Elsait was fun cuz I was relevant now that now that I'm now that I'm a little more nuanced my engagement has definitely gone down because Nuance is boring for a
02:56:44
Andrew Wilsonlot of people it's not as why can't you be inflammatory with nuance I mean you how how would you do that give me an example of a a Nuance take
02:56:55
Andrew Wilsonwhich is also something which is inflammatory like what say say you say well it can be situational whether age gaps are appropriate or not but uh you think that they're perfectly acceptable right so that's a Nuance take but at the
02:57:08
Andrew Wilsonsame time it's inflammatory that doesn't sound inflammatory to me unless I miss something how how is it not it's one of the things most argued about uh that I've seen in these dating spaces whether
02:57:20
Andrew Wilsonor not age gaps are appropriate or not appropriate you can have the Nuance take of yeah I think situationally they can be but generally I'm against them and here's why it can definitely be inflammatory with a Nuance take well we might just have a different
02:57:32
Andrew Wilsondefinition cuz I actually think that's a Nuance I think that's a Nuance take yeah it's it's Nuance but also inflammatory you're still saying the same thing right you're still saying no I think age gaps
02:57:42
Andrew Wilsonare fine but kind reasoning for that right but the way you're saying it is nuanced so it's kind of like when you said I get it earlier you said is still
02:57:53
Elsainflammatory right earlier you said like older men would prefer a younger woman because she's attractive and that to me that's not that to me is not an example of infl inflammatory language because I actually agree I what is inflammat what
02:58:06
Elsawould be inflammatory then how would you how would you make that inflammatory um it's a good question probably by saying something like women over 35 are completely doomed so they
02:58:16
Andrew Wilsonshould probably just go give give up like that's be inflammatory cuz it lacks Nu the Nu St that's just kind of lying though right but those are but those are
02:58:27
Elsathe kind of clips that get a lot of traction is like the 35-year-old woman is screwed she's got no chance I think the Nuance take is the younger woman
02:58:37
Elsaprobably has a lot more options of men for sure but the non- Nuance is just like let's just write off every woman over 30 cuz well I mean why not that I mean you're just talking about clickbait
02:58:50
Andrew Wilsonthough really yeah that's exactly what I'm talking about oh okay well I mean you can still have the clickbait and then still give the Nuance dat can't you I isn't that what almost everybody does they have the click baity title
02:59:02
Andrew Wilsonthumbnail and then they give the Nuance take after you click on it the click baity hook yes yeah it seems like you could do that can you so I mean just going back
02:59:13
Brian Atlasto your thing here you said not a huge fan of oversimplification inflammatory language what did was there an example that you wanted to talk on or that you
02:59:24
Elsasaw uh there probably was but I don't it might not even been from you guys it might have been from like one of the women on the show I honestly can't remember cuz this was this was probably
02:59:33
Elsalike this was a while back um okay no can't remember but it's not necessarily like you as the host I was just the dynamic of the conversation
02:59:44
Elsathat's probably something I was referring to
02:59:49
Brian Atlasokay uh let's see going over then to uh is it Andrea or Andrea it's Andrea Andrea okay you said that uh so you are
03:00:01
Brian Atlascurrently single if I recall okay you said you're waiting until uh or you you either are you wanted to talk about waiting until marriage is that correct oh yeah I am definitely waiting I'm Pro
03:00:12
Brian Atlaswaiting till marriage you're Pro so are you that and that's what you're doing yes are you religious I am uh Christian Christian what
03:00:22
Panel guests (mixed)denomination oh um I I wouldn't be too specific on that I um I'm just Christian let's just leave
03:00:32
Adelineit at that okay um do you go to church I do what is the denomination of the church you go to
03:00:41
Andrew Wilsonum I'm actually not sure is it non- denominational I'm I'm TR
03:00:48
Brian Atlasby chance St Baptist Church Baptist no okay checking no um okay so you said um you and you said you experienced a
03:01:01
Brian Atlaslot of jealousy and possessiveness from men is that related to the waiting until marriage thing or is that a different topic no I would say um I've just been
03:01:10
Panel guests (mixed)on a lot of dates and um it's very men are very possessive jealous and it could be I don't know but um that that is why I'm waiting till marriage because
03:01:21
Panel guests (mixed)because they're possessive and jealous yeah I I wouldn't you know I I would tell men like oh I I want this for my future and um sometimes they don't
03:01:33
Brian Atlasagree but they're still very like clingy and possessive and and okay so let's bring it back to the whole waiting until
03:01:40
Brian Atlasmarriage thing um so are you a virgin no um
03:01:49
Brian Atlasokay uh but so how how recently did you I guess change up to wanting to wait till marriage um well I did have this
03:01:58
Brian Atlaslong-term relationship where um yes we did have we I wasn't caral knowledge what uh carnal knowledge you had sex
03:02:10
Panel guests (mixed)yeah I guess um yeah I didn't I don't know how to phrase that but um so that did and that's that was you know not the best experience for me so that's why I was like okay well my next relationship
03:02:20
Brian AtlasI definitely want to keep it um well was it was the onee relationship you said your longest relationship if my notes unless I [ __ ] my notes up here you're 20 or No 3 years three years
03:02:34
Andrew Wilsonabout three years oh sorry I got mine okay three years uh I'm I'm just curious very quickly if I can interject I just had one quick question uh Brian can you by chance pull up Ephesians 5:22
03:02:48
Andrew WilsonNick can you pull up Ephesians 5 5:22 well the reason is is um I didn't realize that that you were a Christian earlier in the panel but I can just read
03:02:58
Andrew Wilsonit to you says wives submit to your husband as to the Lord do you bow to the Lord do I bow to the Lord yeah uh of course is it a sign of
03:03:11
Andrew Wilsonsubmission to bow to the Lord yes you know are you supposed to submit to your husband as you do unto the Lord yes I guess so then hang on so then we have
03:03:21
Andrew Wilsonestablished that you should do what with your husband I should bow I oh we should bow okay so we got it right so the bow is happening right we are going to do
03:03:31
Panel guests (mixed)the bow if it's an a Godly marriage then of course that's very different okay then we're going to Bow all right all right oh she you have to be married before the you give the bow yes is that fair Andrew marriage has to come before
03:03:44
Andrew Wilsonthe bow yeah I mean it depend right um I would say yeah probably I would uh I would I would still wait for the mirror but I don't see anything wrong with showing respect not bowing to a
03:03:56
Andrew Wilsonboyfriend bowing but earlier when I asked you I said would you ever do it you said no but it seems like now we have kind of a change in the position here well no you're you're correct we do bow to the Lord and if it's a Godly
03:04:08
Brian Atlasmarriage then of course that's that's very different well you said not bowing to the boyfriend I'm not bowing to a boyfriend but if we are should should a man provide before you're married so
03:04:18
Panel guests (mixed)like First Dates you're down to split the first date no the the man should pay on the first date yes but you're not married I understand but he is still
03:04:30
Brian Atlastrying to prove that he can provide in order to be married so you're not willing to be submissive to him until you're married in the bow yes well I'm assuming
03:04:41
Brian Atlasthere's other ways too but you're expecting him to provide prior to marriage but he doesn't get any benefits he does get the benefit he gets the benefit of my time of it's you get the
03:04:53
Panel guests (mixed)exact same thing from him though yeah right you get his time he gets your time yes but I still don't think a bow is like oh my gosh she bowed I have to marry her I don't think that's the whole like I don't know I don't know but you
03:05:06
Panel guests (mixed)said you're not willing to be submissive until you're married no no no no no because if we are dating we are dating to Mary so that already there's already submission within that but I don't think
03:05:18
Panel guests (mixed)what would be what would be the submission within that well as in we are already um like together building a foundation what does that have to do with being submissive just by virtue of you dating
03:05:32
Panel guests (mixed)each other doesn't mean you're submissive yes it does what I mean in this culture cuz there is women who have a roster who will be dating multiple men so like going back to those
03:05:44
Brian Atlasold traditions and being like okay we decide to be exclusive well a woman could be monogamous a little bit submissive a woman could be monogamous and still not be submissive although if it I suppose
03:05:56
Brian Atlasif it's her will and desire to be dating multiple men but she she then that's not dating to that's not that would be a terrible Dynamic though if a man had to
03:06:08
Brian Atlasget submission from his woman to be monogamous that would be terrible Dynamic but um but you wouldn't be submissive well would it be by being
03:06:18
Brian Atlassubmissive just the bow specifically I mean deferring to his leadership okay I don't want you to go to nightclubs I don't want you to go to bars I don't want you to drink of course I don't want
03:06:28
Brian Atlasyou to party of course mhm I don't want you to post promiscuous photos on Instagram of course okay so you're saying that's it's just interesting you okay well you're kind of relating it all back to the bow but I'm
03:06:41
Brian Atlasstill a you're so stuck on the bow that's why I keep bringing it up right well I mean like you kind don't you want to be submissive in all matters and in
03:06:50
Brian Atlasall ways yes if we're dating to Mary yes okay so I bringing it back I guess to the
03:06:58
Brian Atlaswaiting until marriage thing mhm you said I was confused because you said like your justification for the change up there was you had a bad
03:07:09
Brian Atlasrelationship in said bad relationship you had premarital sex right ero are you saying that because you had premarital sex that's the reason for the bad
03:07:21
Panel guests (mixed)relationship I'm not sure if that's the connection that makes sense um no it wasn't a bad relationship we had great times but I do think oh didn't you well
03:07:30
Brian Atlaswhat I to you said it was like I got the UN understanding or impression that it was negative in some way no well I mean to me it was negative
03:07:42
Panel guests (mixed)because we did do it the ungodly way we did have premarital sex and um but he's not a bad guy or a bad person or we didn't have bad times but um my next relationship I would want it to be Godly
03:07:54
Panel guests (mixed)I would want to wait till marriage for were you religious is you being religious a new thing or were you also Christian prior like No I um I mean I was like baptized
03:08:06
Panel guests (mixed)as a kid and everything but I wasn't like going to church every weekend or I wasn't just um I wasn't so in my faith
03:08:13
Brian Atlasas I am now okay so you've become more religious um okay and so just to be clear you are
03:08:25
Brian Atlasthe next person you're going to date you are going to wait until marriage to have sex not just cuz some girls will say well I want to meet the guy that I want to marry but we can have sex before marriage but it has to be the guy that
03:08:37
Panel guests (mixed)I'm pretty sure we're going to marry I'm going to marry no I'm waiting until marriage okay period and you're going to be steadfast in that uh well what what
03:08:47
Brian Atlasdo you mean like you're holding you're holding to that for sure no definitely definitely but um mistakes happen no no mistakes do not happen well can I ask
03:08:58
Brian Atlasyou a question so uh you broke up with the three-year relationship a year ago you said um no no um I broke up you said you were in a three-year relationship and you've been single for one year yeah so
03:09:12
Panel guests (mixed)I've had okay that was a different relationship that was a different yeah okay so wait that was a different relationship yes so I had a three-year relationship that was like throughout High School throughout college and then we broke up and then I had another
03:09:25
Brian Atlasrelationship and that's the one that ended a yearo a year ago okay did you have premarital sex with that guy I did okay so how long have you been Cate um I would
03:09:37
Brian Atlassay about a couple months what was the nature of the relationship with the guy you were with
03:09:44
Panel guests (mixed)a couple months ago uh we were we were dating and um but it was an exclusive or it didn't get to that point you were
03:09:54
Panel guests (mixed)dating for a couple months you said yes how did you guys meet how did we I met him uh where did I meet him I met him um um at a
03:10:05
Brian Atlasconcert not a dating app no I don't do dating apps okay and so hold on hold on and so uh how soon after you had met him did
03:10:16
Panel guests (mixed)you guys hook up um I would say it was maybe 3 months after we met but you said you only dated him for a couple
03:10:25
Brian Atlasmonths yeah well it was long distance it was that one was confusing so were had you guys been like friends or acquaintances yeah yeah we definitely started off as friends well
03:10:39
Panel guests (mixed)hold on you said you met them at a concert I did so you weren't friends when you met at the concert no I I I met him there and then we became friends we exchanged information
03:10:50
Brian Atlasand so he approached you or how did you guys uh yeah I guess so and you said hi I'd like to be friends with you no well it was more um it wasn't clear to you
03:11:01
Brian Atlasthat he had a romantic or sexual interest no no we just started off as friends you think that was his intention to be friends with you I guess yeah I thought so
03:11:18
Brian Atlasokay um so at what point did he make his romantic interest known um I guess a
03:11:28
Brian Atlaswhile after texting we just um I was like oh I like you and he liked me and so um yeah when you so you said you after 3 months of knowing him that's
03:11:39
Brian Atlaswhen you hooked up how soon after there being a clear we like each other how soon after that did you guys hook
03:11:49
Panel guests (mixed)up um like after we told each other we liked each other mhm uh well so we met and then we were
03:12:00
Brian Atlastexting for about like 3 months and then um I don't when you say you were okay so you met at the concert you were texting for 3 months in that threeyear period did you guys ever hang out in person no
03:12:12
Brian Atlasno okay so it was long distance you live in LA he lives where um he lives in Arizona ion Arizona I hope he's not watching this right now okay so you're
03:12:21
Brian Atlastexting him you guys are texting back and forth how often are are you guys calling texting um it was it was mainly text
03:12:31
Brian Atlasokay you guys determined that you like each other and then you meet up in person correct right okay uh how many times did you meet up
03:12:42
Panel guests (mixed)in person total um we only hooked up once and then after that we just um we just kind
03:12:52
Sammy Joeof remained friends you texted for 3 months met in person hooked up when you met in person and then basically remained friends after that yeah it just it didn't work
03:13:04
Panel guests (mixed)out why uh Why didn't it work out I would say it was long distance and um it just I felt wrong about it I felt
03:13:14
Panel guests (mixed)like um like oh it's not it's not a Godly thing I I we hooked up and it was just not the right thing to do so which just accidentally happened yeah yeah how do you
03:13:27
Adelineaccidentally have sex me she acted on Temptation yeah it was very that yeah um okay I was like okay this is not the it's not the right one yeah
03:13:40
Panel guests (mixed)so and this was a couple months ago how recently was this no this was about
03:13:48
Brian Atlasmaybe 9 months 8 months months okay okay um and hold on is there any degree
03:13:59
Brian Atlasof cope here like did he was it like a smash and dash or was it a mutual like I'm just trying to understand this a little better no it
03:14:08
Panel guests (mixed)was Mutual but um but it was you who said you felt uncomfortable with afterwards I did I did I very much did and she dashed no he he didn't want to
03:14:20
Panel guests (mixed)continue seeing you and dash no we we've seen each other recently but just as friends and I think we both agree that it wasn't the right thing to do it we very much were just acting on Temptation so it wasn't
03:14:31
Panel guests (mixed)good you didn't get satisfaction no that's not what I'm saying I'm just saying that it wasn't the right way to go about it and it was yeah exactly what she said it was Temptation it was we were drinking and
03:14:43
Panel guests (mixed)got and that was it I can I ask a question go ahead um from the time from the three-year relationship to the current situationship friendship
03:14:53
Panel guests (mixed)whatever it was when did you decide that like oh no I would rather wait till marriage because I mean everyone is human we mistakes we can have my my
03:15:05
Brian Atlasunderstanding here is you had the standard of you wanted to wait until marriage prior to meeting the concert
03:15:14
Brian AtlasArizona guy it was yeah I definitely um I wanted well how did you falter everybody has those days alcohol and Temptation okay look at it like
03:15:26
Brian Atlaslet's say she meets a hold on let's say she meets a Christian guy at her church and she's like I'm waiting till marriage and then she tells him this
03:15:35
Panel guests (mixed)story you're going to be like really no if they're a Godly Man then they understand that they'll give fores we
03:15:45
Sammy Joeall make mistakes and can backtrack and still God is going to what does it it mean to like okay you chase sit on this podcast and be a born again virgin and
03:15:55
Brian Atlasnow she made the decision and Chase got push back but he push back got he got Absol hold on I I told him I was disappointed in him I literally said that and he got tons of push back online
03:16:08
Sammy Joefor it trust me but who's to say she's seeking a super Christian man it could just be someone who's okay it's not even my world view so for Chase to have slipped
03:16:20
Brian Atlasup like to have premarital sex that's not really my objection I suppose the objection here is you're stating X but you're not actually right I I right in
03:16:32
Andrew Wilsonany let us point out a a quick distinction here which is that chase felt bad and I think that most of these women who are like oh well gee uh you know this happened and now I'm a born
03:16:45
Panel guests (mixed)again they don't seem like they feel bad about it they don't seem like they give a [ __ ] I mean she also never said born again virgin but no definitely I think that's no she didn't I'm not going to lie and be like oh yeah I'm Christian and I'm a ver no I think that's a very
03:16:57
Panel guests (mixed)terrible thing to do I'm completely honest about all of that because and I think like how she stated I think a godly man would understand and if and vice versa if he also had past relations
03:17:09
Brian Atlasthen I would understand as well because nobody's perfect Temptation okay but then what does it actually mean to believe waiting until marriage if every couple
03:17:20
Adelinemonths you have a slip up what does it mean well who's to say I'm going have another slip up I think the biggest thing is like you know uh women want I don't mean to speak for all but like we
03:17:32
Adelinewant relationships to work and there so many like I think it's kind of been ingrained is anytime you involve sex it complic it complicates it or it you know
03:17:42
Adelineme it messes things up a little bit and so us as women we're always told told to preserve ourselves we're always told to wait we're this and that so we're like okay if we want a relationship to work we need to preserve ourselves and make
03:17:54
Adelinesure that we like whoever it is that we're dating for who they are and not involve the sex until after everything after that then everything matches up what that was true cuz once I got I got picked up and I was like just so you
03:18:07
Andrew Wilsonknow I'm not going to [ __ ] and he said all right well you can go home then yeah yeah that awesome I mean that's terrible right wait I respect
03:18:18
Panel guests (mixed)that could you close the door um but but her as a relig like bringing a religion like okay if she like makes a mistake do you want her to walk around town with the girl with the belt calling shame
03:18:30
Andrew Wilsonshame for making nobody asking for the scarlet no nobody's asking for The Scarlet Letter but it has become pretty apparent to me
03:18:39
Andrew Wilsonthat often what happens is women will seek uh Christianity and the idea of being reborn into Christianity in order
03:18:49
Andrew Wilsonto mask their promiscuous past uh rather than as a form of repenting from it and this is why I think there's a delineation point and why this is being brought up by Brian and it's a very good
03:19:01
Andrew Wilsonpoint many times women will use that as a mask and say now I'm above criticism uh for you know my overly promiscuous past uh that's what I think they're moving towards that for rather than okay I'm in a state of deep repentance
03:19:15
Brian Atlasbecause I actually feel miserable about the the things that I've done by the way Andrew I sent you a text message um I guess it's just okay this whole like waiting till marriage Christian waiting
03:19:27
Brian Atlastill marriage but has mistakes and slip ups having sex is a conscious choice so it's like a vegan who eats meat once a
03:19:37
Brian Atlasweek are you still a vegan no no you know what I mean I don't know look I don't know I'm not against premarital sex I guess I'm just confused my my
03:19:47
Brian Atlasbigger thing is like more so from like a secular point of view these girls who will have had one night stands or hooked up relatively quickly say the last three boyfriends they had
03:19:59
Brian Atlasthey slept with them on the first second third date then they're like look you can change up at any time however you want to move that's your call but I think you're allowed to feel like you're
03:20:10
Brian Atlasgetting a raw deal as a guy if like the girl you hooked up relatively quickly
03:20:19
Brian Atlaswithout anything and now you're a week ago and then now you meet me and now you want to make me wait three months that's your call but I'mma feel raw about I'm
03:20:30
Brian Atlaslike hold on this isn't your actual Val like this isn't your values it's not your values it's just some like arbitrary thing that you you're like um playing a game essentially you're
03:20:42
Brian Atlasplaying a game like you're trying to leverage sex to get something out of me whether that's commitment or whatever and so uh I don't know it feels like a raw deal it's like how much did your
03:20:52
Brian Atlasmindset change in seven days to now that that you're now so passionate about this yeah I mean some girls I mean you'll hear stories of a girl who's currently sleeping with a dude who has a
03:21:05
Brian Atlasfriends with benefits and then but she's like dating a guy who she's potentially eyeing as a boyfriend long term and she's making him wait while [ __ ] another dude that's crazy to me I mean
03:21:16
Brian Atlasyou can do it you can do it it feels like a raw deal it's kind of like hey uh I'm trying to think of a perfect example uh here it's like
03:21:26
Brian Atlasuh you go to a car dealership and uh uh you you buy a car for for $20,000 you as the woman you buy a car
03:21:40
Brian Atlasfor $20,000 and then you find out your girlfriend got the same car brand new car for $10,000 you're like that's not hold on that's not
03:21:50
Adelinefair why'd they get a better deal than me you know dealership says I just felt like it no reason you know so I don't know I think there should be a waiting
03:22:03
Adelineperiod between that and so there shouldn't be like okay I'm I'm I had sex 7 days ago and now I'm going to wait till marriage but I'm going to go on a date on Friday you shouldn't do that you
03:22:14
Adelineshould wait there should be a waiting period before you start to date again would that make you feel better or would you still be mad if it's been 6 months to a year I mean I mean usually
03:22:26
TTS / donation readerthat's part of repentance Ulus is the Pagan donated $200 girl in the yellow trust me this guy in my opinion was playing up that he agrees that it shouldn't have happened
03:22:37
TTS / donation readerthe intention all long was to smash eventually he'll stop being your friend and ghost but I'm just confused like so you guys said you liked each other
03:22:51
Brian Atlasyeah I feel like we're not I do actually want to dig in a little bit more on this you said you liked each other you guys had sex why not continue to date like just because you had sex doesn't mean you
03:23:03
Panel guests (mixed)have to no longer that's where I'm confused long distance it yeah that was the biggest point for me it was long distance and but then why did y'all smash why does it matter if it's long distance if you guys aren't doing that
03:23:15
Panel guests (mixed)because that's just preference I wasn't comfortable with long distance me either I was just asking yeah and um and then again I I
03:23:27
Panel guests (mixed)saw it through after a while and I was like wow that's not what I want for the relationship that's not what I want for my marriage to be and um you don't want your marriage to be what I wouldn't want
03:23:37
Panel guests (mixed)to have premarital wait so so we already had um you know sex before before marriage so um and it was Mutual I'm not like but um
03:23:50
Panel guests (mixed)but that's just not how I would want my marriage to be so it like I kind of counted that out what if he what if he asked you to marry him
03:23:59
Panel guests (mixed)afterwards um like after like after what was what happened if he were like actually I I consider it he's a great guy it's just
03:24:10
Panel guests (mixed)that it was long distance and you know we fell into temptation but um but I I don't know it just wouldn't that be more motivation to stay together though now
03:24:22
Brian Atlasthat you cuz you're it seems like you're justifying part of the reason of not wanting to continue seeing him aside from the longdistance thing some of the
03:24:31
Brian Atlaspretext there is you did have premarital sex mhm so now he's ruled that's like a negative a negative Mark against him no
03:24:41
Panel guests (mixed)it's not negative um not negative in any way like I I see him as a great person and we still get along but it's just the fact that it's premarital that I I feel
03:24:52
Elsabad about it and that's just not the way I would want my marriage to go but you already wait but but but if he asked you to marry him afterwards would you be opposed to that since y'all already had
03:25:03
Panel guests (mixed)been slept together um I I'm not sure I'd really have to think about it like say like a guy did come to you and you really thought he
03:25:15
Panel guests (mixed)was husband been material you really wanted to marry him but you like accidentally had premarital sex with him like would you just automatically be like oh I can't because I don't want to do that but what if you did want to
03:25:27
Panel guests (mixed)marry him like would you automatically disqualify him because you had that premarital sex with him even though it was a mutual agreement mm yeah
03:25:36
Panel guests (mixed)um yeah i' still think it's wrong i' still yeah I guess it's like I just like question like how committed to you are this like would it be better for you to
03:25:49
Panel guests (mixed)say you're just waiting for the right person or are you actually waiting for marriage no definitely waiting till marriage because I think the right person will wait for marriage but but
03:26:00
Sammy Joebut intercourse is two people so if you're also agreeing to premarital sex it's because you also said yes so if you
03:26:11
Sammy Joemeet Joe and you and Joe fall into temptation uh-huh even if you fell into it right you fell into temptation and you fell into each other right and you had
03:26:24
Sammy Joepremarital sex now he's not a candidate for marriage anymore yeah even though you also agreed to it and you thought Joe was the one he was going to be your husband you thought
03:26:35
Sammy Joehe was going to propose in two months and you were like you know what he's the right one this feels right let's do it now that you guys have done it you were so passionate about about marrying him but because you had premarital sex now
03:26:48
Sammy Joehe's off the table and not a candidate for marriage anymore how fair is that to him when it was a mutual decision for you guys to have premarital sex that now he's not a candidate anymore because you
03:27:01
Panel guests (mixed)two mutually agreed on something no we definitely yeah no I see that um I don't think I mean I guess it is
03:27:11
Panel guests (mixed)unfair to him but that's just me and my choice and I just I wouldn't be okay with that I'd feel feel like it's not the right thing
03:27:21
Sammy Joeto do so he bought the ring in March you guys had premarital sex in April oh that's different that's but how do you know he bought the ring you've already told but you do you get what I'm saying
03:27:34
Sammy Joeyou don't know when your significant other buys you the ring to get ready to propose to you so he buys you the ring in March you two mutually decide to have premarital sex in April and then at the end of April you're like you know what I can't I'm not I'm not capable of
03:27:46
Sammy Joemarrying you anymore and he's like well I already bought the ring I was going to propose to you next week but now you're like oh well I'm sorry we had we both decided to have premarital sex and now you're not a candidate anymore oh then that's different if he already had the
03:27:58
Panel guests (mixed)ring and we had that discussion then that's different what if you didn't know but you didn't know he bought the ring you guys that's what we're saying so it's like so he bought the ring we had the premar the premarital sorry the
03:28:10
Panel guests (mixed)premarital sex and then I after was like nope he's not a candidate for me anymore and then after we have have the discussion of like well I bought the ring and but you've already broken his heart because you told him you don't want to marry
03:28:22
Sammy Joehim do you get what I'm saying like he's not going to be like oh well I already bought you a ring and now you're like oh okay well never mind then let's get married you're like oh you bought the ring already that's okay now now it's
03:28:33
Panel guests (mixed)okay that we had premarital sex because now I know you had the intention to marry me also good question you say you want to wait for marriage what makes you
03:28:44
Panel guests (mixed)be like oh let's just have sex with this person even though I don't want to marry him but yet you're waiting for marriage where does that like line fall in
03:28:54
Panel guests (mixed)between we like I'll give this guy a pass like him specifically no just in general so you're saying like I gave this guy a pass but after that I'm like
03:29:05
Panel guests (mixed)okay now I'm waiting till marriage yeah like if you already knew you were going to sorry if you already if you already knew you were going to wait till marriage like why even try to
03:29:16
Brian Atlassue him right didn't you say that the reason you didn't want to continue seeing him was of because of long distance yes so why did you even bother
03:29:26
Brian Atlascarrying on this friendship and then allowing it to proceed into a romantic relationship and then allowing sex to occur if you already had the
03:29:38
Adelinepredetermination that long distance is a deal breaker like not it wasn't a deal breaker can I sum something up yes so I think that whenever you guys met there was the interest there you both knew
03:29:51
Adelineunderlyingly that you were interested that's why you continue to talk all those months you finally met up you acted on the Temptation you're like hey this isn't really in alignment with my beliefs I feel shame surrounding what
03:30:02
Adelinehappened and he's like oh yeah okay whatever he that men don't care like that that you're religious they don't care and so he essentially are you associating shame with him and that's why you no longer want to pursue him no
03:30:14
Adelineshame is no I would or not necessarily shame is a strong word but it's just you acted and that was not in alignment with your belief so you do not want to continue going down that road him because he also partook in something
03:30:27
Brian Atlasthat was not in alignment with your beliefs exactly but like okay wait hold on but I didn't hold on hold on hold on hold on hold on I didn't even get an answer to my question so my question is
03:30:38
Brian Atlaswhy knowing like the justification you provided for why you didn't actually after having had sex you didn't want to pursue it is because it was long
03:30:48
Brian Atlasdistance you knew prior to this rendevu that it was long distance he lived in Arizona you live in Los Angeles so one why did you even pursue
03:30:59
Brian Atlasit and then two why did you have sex with him knowing its long distance if you're I mean perhaps it's um it's post ha talk
03:31:09
Adelinejustification but you knew he was in Arizona she admitted that she knew what she was doing did you hold on why don't we let her explain it go ahead well the reason why I kept pursuing it and kept talking to
03:31:21
Brian Atlashim was because I really liked him he was funny just great person but um he's still he's still funny right yeah of course still a great person of course okay so then it's not because he lives
03:31:32
Brian Atlasin Arizona then I that is a factor I mean but then why okay but hold on what changed because he was always in Arizona you guys met up and you had sex what are
03:31:44
Brian Atlasthe variables what are the factors here that led to you now being you were friends then it was elevated to romantic
03:31:53
Panel guests (mixed)Prospect you had sex now it's back to friends we're not dating we are not dating no but we we are good friends not like we're best friends and we talk every day but we still we can get along
03:32:05
Brian Atlasand we hold on hold on wait wait you're single I am and are you are you you talking to any guys right now I'm a Christian man I come into the picture I find out you're good friends
03:32:18
Brian Atlasand talking to a guy who you [ __ ] that's crazy that's another topic though that's another topic though you said you talk all the time and your friends I didn't say we talk all the time I say we get along like we are you
03:32:30
Brian Atlasknow we're we're hum we're still we're fine we don't have any bad terms or anything regardless of what happened in the P okay so you're not talking to him then it's just amicable maybe I misunderstood you family so we how time did you talk to him the last time I
03:32:42
Brian Atlastalked to him was probably I would say a month or two no like back month all right I perhaps misunderstood in any case I'm still confused I haven't really gotten an answer you knew he lived in
03:32:52
Brian AtlasArizona yes okay why did you pursue him if long distance was an issue well it wasn't like a great issue or anything
03:33:03
Panel guests (mixed)but go ahead do you think it was an actual like fall into temptation or a lack of discipline of your decision and
03:33:12
Brian Atlasfaith I would say both hold on I got a I got a question for the ladies if you're you meet a guy you've been talking to him for months you both have
03:33:23
Brian Atlastold each other you like each other like don't like y'all know kind of if you're like I'm ready to [ __ ] this guy right
03:33:33
Elsawell and if you and if you add alcohol to the mix if you add alcohol to the mix then you're setting yourself up to fall into on the Al I'm not wait I'm not I'm
03:33:43
Elsanot I'm not disagreeing you I'm not you I actually I actually think that if you're going to say that this is my belief then you have to set yourself up for success to honor that belief well
03:33:56
Elsathat and I'm not saying that to to shame you by the way it's just like if if like you're she's training for a fitness competition right so she's dedicated she's committed she's setting herself up for success by packing protein snacks by
03:34:07
Elsahydrating by training so if if you are going to have the belief and share that belief of I'm a Christian and I'm waiting until marriage then you have to set yourself up for success by not drinking with someone that you're
03:34:19
Panel guests (mixed)attracted to that you don't want to does that make sense no it's true but that belief became stronger after him so I didn't Express those things with him I wasn't already like well I'm Christian I'm waiting till marriage and I think
03:34:31
Sammy Joethat's why I was so easily to fall into temptation because I didn't have those strong values as I do okay that's where we had after that it made it sound like after past long relationships you made
03:34:44
Panel guests (mixed)that decision you didn't make that decision until 2 months ago after it was definitely after Arizona the we're going to call him Arizona um that I was like okay I definitely need to be stronger in
03:34:55
Panel guests (mixed)my discipline my beliefs and because I just don't want to do that anymore yeah okay I'm sorry no you're fine but this sounds like this sounds like to me it
03:35:05
Panel guests (mixed)seems like like yeah you made a mistake but it might almost be better to pursue a man in to be your husband if you made the mistake with like I don't know if that makes sense
03:35:17
Panel guests (mixed)instead of push it away so now you just added a body and you also don't want to marry this person yeah I don't know if we're getting the whole story here what's
03:35:27
Panel guests (mixed)missing okay so you guys H you went you went to Arizona or he came here no he came to La he came to La how long was he in La for um he was only here for a couple days he was like on some break
03:35:39
Panel guests (mixed)from school okay so you guys hook up and then it was like about 3 days do you guys hang out after you hook up or okay and everything's good or yeah you only hook up once or a couple times it was
03:35:49
Brian Atlasonly once on first day or on the last no between in only second very detailed wait you only hooked wait so
03:35:59
Brian Atlasyou hooked up once or multiple times no it was only once one time okay and so how did I mean you guys both told each other you liked each other right right what did he tell you in terms of
03:36:12
Panel guests (mixed)what he was looking for he wanted to keep seeing you uh um well no like we definitely did keep talking but it was I think we were both mutually like oh it felt kind of
03:36:24
Brian Atlasuncomfortable I don't know like wait it felt uncomfortable mutually uncomfortable but didn't you say that you didn't Express this whole waiting until marriage thing and that you're a Christian right is he a
03:36:36
Panel guests (mixed)Christian um well his family is I'm not sure if he is specifically so how I mean I assume like
03:36:45
Brian Atlashe you guys had sex why would he also be uncomfortable that you guys had sex this seems to be he was uncomfortable cuz she
03:36:56
Panel guests (mixed)was uncomfortable well sure that's fair mhm but I don't think because I we we had like a discussion about it and I told him like you know what I I feel wrong about this I do feel yeah uncomfortable about it and I just we
03:37:08
Panel guests (mixed)kind of agreed to stop talking after that and um so you stopped talking because you had the sex yeah then why did because but then we all but then after some time we did talk
03:37:21
Panel guests (mixed)about it again and we you know we were on good terms well were you ever on bad terms I guess in that period where I told him like I I don't want to talk anymore and and we stopped
03:37:34
Panel guests (mixed)talking was that before he left back to Arizona or after no that was after so that brings me back was it in the beginning or was it in the end how was your interaction
03:37:45
Panel guests (mixed)after you did it while you were still together so the interaction after we had sex yes were you still together for like two days in person yeah yeah like we so it's the beginning okay and then how did you
03:37:58
Panel guests (mixed)interact you didn't tell him about that then after you guys did it you waited until he got home to tell him that he was uncomfortable how did you guys interact in person was it something else was his personality and being together what made you also uncomfortable like
03:38:11
Panel guests (mixed)wow I shouldn't have done that because this guy doesn't do the same things that I feel for him over the phone as in comparison to in person or like can we
03:38:20
Panel guests (mixed)go deeper The Epiphany was definitely like after um no he flew back home and we would still talk but then after after like a while I was like okay this it wasn't the right thing to do it sunk in
03:38:32
Panel guests (mixed)and I was like I I I it's not that I regret it he's a great person or but um it just it wasn't the right thing to do because I I truly want to get married and have kids someday and I just don't
03:38:44
Panel guests (mixed)want I don't want that when you woke up that morning you were like H why did I do that no it wasn't like I woke up that morning like the following day it wasn't like um I don't know what they call it
03:38:54
Panel guests (mixed)like Epiphany post not clar yeah yeah that that it definitely wasn't that like we still got along we we still went out the following day and and we yeah but um
03:39:06
Panel guests (mixed)but somewhere along like after like a month I was like okay um I do have I do want to get married someday I do want to have kids and I just don't want it to be yeah essentially yeah it's okay you know
03:39:19
Panel guests (mixed)we all make mistakes that's why God gave you free will is and then sometimes maybe that's a reason why so you can learn from those mistakes and realize what you do and what you don't want it's
03:39:30
Elsabut it seems like what the girls on this side are trying to clarify is was the deal breaker that you guys hooked up like is it was a deal breaker that he agreed to partake in premarital sex or
03:39:42
Panel guests (mixed)was it something else I guess there were a lot of deal breakers it was the premarital sex it was long distance is difficult um and then also around that time that was like um yeah that was like
03:39:52
Panel guests (mixed)a year ago and I was still you know we were both he's still in school and I'm still you know working and stuff so it was just it just didn't feel right to me and it sounded like what Brian was
03:40:03
Elsaasking was you knew all those things beforehand cuz nothing actually changed about those variables of him of him being far away or whatever like whatever the variables are that you just listed so it sounded like what he was was
03:40:15
Sammy Joeasking is if you knew all that going in why did you still like show up and hang out well I just and put yourself and put yourself in the position to have premarital sex right no I just I just
03:40:27
Elsareally like the guy and sometimes when you have feelings it just kind of stirs it just kind of goes about a way and again that was before my strong before you made the decision but it sounds like now you would not follow how you feel because you're determined to follow your
03:40:40
Elsabeliefs right and to to exercise discipline to what what this is a long conversation about the same thing what the [ __ ] wait is injur
03:40:51
Panel guests (mixed)eating oh my God we're not getting we're not getting anywhere but to the same point over and over I think we all understand like next agre there's so many questions to ask no more premarital
03:41:03
Sammy Joesex she's not getting enough attention it's not about my attention we can talk about need to be pampered need a little pampering I did put that in my bio is that we a lot of the times one topic is
03:41:15
Sammy Joelike we just asked her the same question all of every single one of us asked her the same and with the same answer and then we like maybe we can simpy a little bit
03:41:26
Sammy Joedon't get it you don't have to get it she's not asking you to not have premarital sex with her she's not asking you to wait until marriage to have sex
03:41:36
Sammy Joewith her so it doesn't it doesn't matter whether you L my Face's a l there's a lot of cope there's a lot of cope going on there's a lot of I don't believe this going on in my brain right now what part
03:41:50
Brian Atlasdon't you believe it's just you just said I really really liked the guy and then we [ __ ] and now I don't really really like the
03:42:01
Brian Atlasguy he didn't put it down he's amazing he's an amazing person but I don't want to date him but iuck [ __ ] him against my vales like she I don't want to I think everybody here amazing I don't want to
03:42:13
Panel guests (mixed)marry everybody he's so I he's such a great guy he's so amazing we [ __ ] even though it's against my Val you're telling me you've never been with somebody you felt like
03:42:25
Panel guests (mixed)oh I really want to be with this person then you did it and then it you didn't want to do it no more something magically changed no it just wasn't it now let's move on you talking about the sex cuz yes I'm
03:42:38
Brian Atlastalking about the sex if you see Itty Bitty Piggy in the market are youing [ __ ] car with her I'm out of here are you saying that's what the case is with her I'm not saying that cuz that's not
03:42:48
Panel guests (mixed)what she said she didn't say that but in my opinion what I got from all these questions is that's what my opinion is is something about that fell off if if it doesn't feel good if it doesn't feel
03:43:01
Panel guests (mixed)good in your soul to have sex with somebody then you want to move on then something about that is what's wrong because you liked him before and you don't like a after so you're you're saying for her it was cuz the sex was trash I can't speak
03:43:14
Panel guests (mixed)for her but but in my experience if that's how I felt then that's what it was I don't think it was that I don't think it was that so what do you think it was you don't understand what it was but as a woman that's what I
03:43:26
Adelineunderstood wait I was under the assumption that you had this strong strong of Faith prior to him now to
03:43:33
Adelineclear it up you had this this a strong faith after him exactly and no but that's not but she's saying that's what
03:43:44
Adelinehappened under the presum so she can have her faith and then she can have it as he was [ __ ] hering didn't want to do it I don't like
03:43:55
Panel guests (mixed)is that how you do it Bri like oh I need to really focus on God right now this is not it doing like this yeah see I don't know bro like she she didn't she didn't
03:44:07
Brian Atlaswant to wait till marriage and literally as he's inside of her that's when she was like oh wait marriage what make that it was after a couple month after the the sex if that's what we're calling it
03:44:19
Panel guests (mixed)no no no no but you stopped dating him immediately no I didn't she said a month after she yeah he flew in we hung up the first dat no but you said you felt bad about having the sex like I didn't say
03:44:31
Panel guests (mixed)immediately she said not she did she literally answered my question when I asked her was it the next day you're not listening you're not paying the next day she said the next day was after thought you had this standard like after your first relationship and we were just
03:44:43
Panel guests (mixed)saying practice what you preach I have a question I have a question so if he would have stayed there in town after y'all would have done it would you still have felt shame about it if he was still
03:44:54
TTS / donation readeraround you complaining that we're talking about this and she's like I mean we're still continuing it what can I do bro okay that was a valid question I do actually here sort of Shifting Gears a
03:45:06
Brian Atlaslittle bit but it's related to this so you were like well oh what if you're as a guy you hit and the pussy's not good is that what you're saying bro hold on first first off [ __ ] is like pizza it
03:45:17
Panel guests (mixed)it's hard to mess up pizza right no cuz what you put too much tomato sauce there's a different I what kind of [ __ ] you had Desmond what the [ __ ] look
03:45:29
Brian AtlasI'm just saying most [ __ ] good [ __ ] right it's hard to mess up huh J nearly all [ __ ] is good [ __ ] I'm just saying Enter space yeah ear muffs Andrew ear
03:45:40
Sammy Joemuffs but you disagree there many I'm bisexual oh yeah so what kind ofst are you talking about but like it's it's also what's
03:45:51
Sammy Joeattached to it so it's like the she yeah yeah yeah of course you know like she could be a dead fish she could be not you know like that's okay for you she could be a screecher like she just like
03:46:03
Brian Atlasif she she just lays there like that and you enjoy it even if first off that's so rare wait there's other way you that's